Self-Deprecating Humor Can Be An Opening For Business Bullies

Many of us that were tortured as a youngster by a bully, quickly realized that humor could be used to forgo a beating or teasing. Self-deprecating humor was sometimes an even better weapon in our anti-beating arsenal. Yet, we also quickly learned that too much of that type of humor could also backfire on us and end up getting teased even more. The bully saw another opening and attacked another weakness not known until then.

In business, I have often used humor as part of my delivery. I have had those moments when I should have kept my mouth shut instead of adding the quip that wasn’t needed at the time. Many times, a self-deprecating joke could disarm a tense situation during a disagreement in a meeting. The observation I made earlier on exposing another weakness can come back to haunt you with certain people. My mother in dealing with my bullying instances often said, “they are jealous of what you have and who you are.” This was hard to contemplate while de-wedging my underwear

We have always had those in management that could use a stern talking to by HR in the way they handle their staff. The old saying of “the beatings will continue until morale improves” is one we laugh at to cover over a bigger problem. There are managers that I would classify as the “I know you are, but what am I” people that don’t have the ability to interact with their employees as human beings. Some believe in the bully mentality that self-deprecating humor is an opening for them to “join the club” or “be part of the pack” in laughing at others.

Mental health is at the forefront of our current social discourse. Be it an Olympic Athlete, a Prince, or your next-door neighbor, the stress of our lives can lead to horrible things occurring in our minds. The self-deprecation can be a stress reliever in certain situations to help the mind dismiss the main issue causing the stress in the first place.

What we all must be aware of is that self-deprecation may be a tool for stress relief. For those idiots that don’t have the social skills or Emotional Intelligence to identify self-deprecating humor sometimes as a sign of stress de-escalation, we have to guard against our own self doubt being used against us.?