Selena Kim's Secret Sauce for Success

1. Who are you? What's your story?

I am a Canadian child of Korean immigrants, raised in Scarborough and Richmond Hill, and schooled in Ontario and British Columbia. My strengths were always in life sciences and writing, which ended up steering me to a career as a patent lawyer.?I have practiced at the same big law firm, Gowling WLG, in Toronto for twenty years.

I am married and have two children aged 8 and 10, who have some challenges as both are on the autism spectrum.?My life is pretty busy, but satisfying.?In my spare time (which is generally 9-10 pm when kids and dog and husband have gone to bed) I like to watch K-dramas to try to improve my Korean.

2. What's your definition of success?

Weekends off, and being able to mostly do what I want.?

3. How did you achieve success?

My life was fairly linear and things went generally smoothly until I was several years into my career.?I was always a good student and a star associate who was a team player, worked hard and was in demand.?I was then promoted to partner, and also got pregnant with my first child, and my career ground to a halt soon after.?Having a child didn’t change my levels of motivation or drive, but I think it changed how others saw me.?Being a partner in a large firm also meant that work would start being delegated to younger associates at lower billing rates rather than to me at my newly increased rate.?I also hadn’t appreciated that as a partner, I would suddenly be responsible for generating all my own work.?All my skills and years of hard work didn’t matter anymore if I had nothing to work on.?I eventually returned to success by not giving up, gaining more skills, networking, and changing around the mix of my practice to not be solely dependent on litigation.?I also give credit to my firm, who was willing to wait out those tough years.?

4. What's your secret sauce for success?

Realizing that what got me to various stages of my life and career won’t get me through the next stages.?Continual self-development is a must.

I have also learned to say no more often.?Women are raised to be people pleasers but as a result, we get asked a lot more often than men, to do things that do not advance us in any way.?I have become better about saying no without apologizing or justifying.

5. How do you prioritize peace?

In the mornings, I have coffee and get a workout in before anything else, so that I ensure I prioritize some time to myself before giving in to demands from family and work.?I refrain from thinking about work or checking emails until I’m at my desk ready to start working.

In the evenings, I walk my dog and chat with others in my neighbourhood.

I am also trying to learn to be grateful for, then let go of, past people and practices who don’t fit as well into my life as it has evolved.

6. Anything else you would like to share?

It’s so important to keep yourself developing, growing, and changing.?I have changed so much in the last 2 years due to increased introspection brought on by the pandemic.?In many ways I am unrecognizable from who I was before.?It is important to live as broad a life as possible and not get stuck in narrow routines.