Seek not balance but asymmetry

“…THE CHALLENGE OF WORK-LIFE BALANCE IS WITHOUT QUESTION

ONE OF THE MOST SIGNIFICANT STRUGGLES FACED BY MODERN MAN….”

- STEVEN COVEY

Perhaps the solution isn’t to endlessly seek balance.

Perhaps it is to not be a modern man.

BALANCE.

It’s the stock in trade mantra of every self help guru, book, blog, podcast, lapel badge and bumper sticker.

We are all meant to be seeking this holy grail of work-life balance, some zen like equilibrium with everything from my exploding Gmail inbox (replete with it’s ‘reminder nudges’, Nigerian Financial ministers and endless ‘last minute opportunities’ ) to my stunningly defiant four year old whose favourite new sport is ‘boundary testing’. I’m meant to be getting fit and seeking fulfilment in the great outdoors - whilst simultaneously making sure I track every variable on my fancy new watch so I can upload the digital representation of my calorie incinerating outdoor exploits up to a digital cloud all so I can post it on ‘the socials’ as soon as I get inside.

Balance, equilibrium, symmetry, harmony, parity.

In researching for this piece I was googling quotes on the topic of balance. Lurking in the pages was every life-affirming, mantra-inspiring, incense burning modern day zen feel good guru you could imagine. For me however, far more important was who was not there. Who was absent from this epic roll-call of advisors and pontificators of peace and harmony within our troubled lives?

The poets.

The conquerers.

Henry.

THE POETS - THOREAU, WHITMAN, YEATS, FROST.

Men and Women who didn’t seek equilibrium, they wanted love, passion, wildness, reckless abandon and even destruction, all in volumes that would make a Costco buyer go weak at the knees.

“…Oh while I live, to be the ruler of life, not a slave, to meet life as a powerful conqueror, and nothing exterior to me will ever take command of me…” - Whitman

“…Disobedience is the true foundation of liberty. The obedient must be slaves…” - Thoreau

“…I would have written of me on my stone: I had a lover's quarrel with the world… - Frost

THE CONQUERORS - KHAN, ALEXANDER, COPERNICUS, JOBS.

They saw the world through a different lens. Saw possibility, truth, evidence and brought it into the light regardless of cost. There was no parity here - no concessions, no quarter. They shaped everything from the shape of nations, our understanding of our place amongst the stars, even the fabric of social society.

HENRY.

“…Don't do anything by half. If you love someone, love them with all your soul. When you go to work, work your ass off. When you hate someone, hate them until it hurts…” - Henry Rollins

Enough said.

THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD IS WHERE THE WHITE LINE IS - IT’S ALSO THE WORST PLACE TO DRIVE.

So what’s my point? Am I advocating that we cancel our yoga membership, shelve the saffron robes, ‘beat your ploughshares into swords’ and wage war? Give up sleep, take up whiskey and start smoking Gauloise as a tortured soul pouring forth stories of unrequited love on a dusty old typewriter?

Far from it.

Instead simply consider the option of counter-trading the common wisdom.

Remember who and where you are. Behind you stretches a long line of men and women who put you where you are exactly because they sought out discomfort, adventure and imbalance. They crossed oceans, waged war, sought to pry apart the universe. Progress was made not through balance but imbalance. A competitive edge, asymmetrical knowledge. A certain savagery pitted against the world.

But Nature is all about balance is it not? It seeks homeostasis within us, abhors a vacuum, seeks to fill gaps. Look behind the curtain and see that Nature is a seething furnace of evolution. Wanton destruction of the unnecessary, less fortunate, poorly prepared. It is brutal test and measure, winners move forward, losers do not. It’s simply the second law of thermodynamics. Chaos wins.

Seek not balance but asymmetry.

Don’t be a ‘modern man’ - reach back to draw from your ancestors, refute the trappings of the modern and become something more. Be a hidden savage in civilised times and reap the edge.

MOVE TO THE FRONT FOOT.

Rather than working to tip the scale back to centre, fight to push it back well past - in your favour. Imagine not having work/life balance but getting the needle well over in the family side (or work side if that’s your passion). Instead of just getting out of ‘unhealthy’ fight to become better than average, better than ‘acceptable’.

This doesn’t mean you now have to be the king of ‘hustle-town’. I’m not a fan of this unhealthy obsession with ‘he who can hustle the hardest’ like working a 100 hour week somewhere makes you great. Be the person that delivers the goods in fewer hours than anyone else - that makes you exceptional. I’ve done the dance of working into oblivion - unless that is your passion and sole purpose, it rarely ends well.

Leverage, risk/return ratio, asymmetrical knowledge - the business world never seeks balance, it wants the advantage, to leverage speed, knowledge, position, the full court press. Why should you be any different. Be in the business of you and yours and start pressing the advantage.

THE MIND IS PRIMARY

Now you are imbued with a mindset not seeking moderate but excellent. You are on the attack. That’s where the passion lies, the drive, the indomitable spirit. Don’t be mediocre, don’t settle, don’t seek the white line in the middle. Be uncompromising, unrelenting, push back and march forward. And if you are only partially successful, you’ll still be in the place where everyone else is striving to be.