Secrets of Language - The Code of Human Connection

At a training last week, I received a question that really piqued my interest. I was asked specifically about my use of analogies. I was told I'm pretty good at it. (Which is astute of that person, because I AM good at them.) The question was: can I teach people to do what I do with analogies.

That's a bit more difficult.

Level One Analogies are Like a Crowbar

Yes, this subtitle is an analogy. A clunky one. The reason I called it level one is that it's too obvious. Too forgettable. And the reason I say a crowbar is that there's not as much finesse applied. The way our brains want to appreciate an analogy is when it ties specifically to us, for instance. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Why do people want analogies? It's because our brains do a lot of pattern recognition. If I can understand how this new thing is like this old thing, I can derive useful information faster. A crowbar can pry open a door. A rough clunky analogy can give you understanding fast, but without any grace.

What We Really Want is a Nale?niki

A nale?niki is a Polish crepe, pretty much similar to a French crepe, and many other thinner, often sweet (but not always) variety of pancakes made all over the world. And what I mean is that we love a tasty nostalgic food that reminds us of good times, family, warmth. To me, the best analogies warm our bellies, such as it were. They connect with us where we are, not just through some clunky attempt to simplify learning.

Understanding a good analogy is like a nale?niki. It's a subtle thing. It uses basic ingredients, like consideration, but we sweeten it up to make sure people understand the information received is special.

Humans Love Pattern Recognition

Our ability to see when something is like something else, as well as to understand when something doesn't match a pattern is one of our primary and best used forms of learning and understanding. It's also primal. One reason we all can see the face of Elvis in a storm drain is paradolia, the act of taking random information and giving it a face.

This stems from a need for us to recognize humans (friend or foe) and even before that the need to know if the tall grass hid a saber-tooth tiger.

As such, analogy is in the same family of learnings. We use them to better understand information faster. Once we understand "this is like that," we can flesh out our understanding beyond the remedial.

Fast Track to Understanding

I explained why analogy is useful. I explained that a nice warm subtle related-to-the-people-you're-addressing analogy is far better. And then I explained why humans love to recognize patterns. There's one little raspberry I forgot to put on the plate.

Shared experience. Once we all hear and experience an analogy to explain something, we can then all use that analogy as the shorthand for information exchange. If you were to practice analogies with someone, you could give the person feedback by judging their analogy on a scale of "crowbar to nale?niki."

And THAT, by the way, explains why memes are so interesting. Yes, those kinds of memes.

Once you know the context, you can exchange information with such a minimal amount of words. Kind of like language, only with more layers. But then, this leads us to our last important detail.

Idioms and Language Barriers

Alicia Vikander explained on the Graham Norton show the challenge with how certain expressions don't always translate especially well. This video is just over 1 minute long.

In it, she explains a Swedish idiom about "sliding in on a shrimp sandwich." You'll have to watch to get it.

But for our purposes, this points out the challenge with using analogies across borders. My company, for instance, often has mixed groups with people from Poland, Spain, India, Germany and beyond, all in one room. It's sometimes hard to throw an analogy at a group of people who don't have common language.

Like our nale?niki example. If I say "crepe," someone will get it. If I say pancake, others will, etc. And don't get me started on a good stroopwafel. That's a whole other thing.

My point: analogies aren't always a slam dunk way to convey information until the group derives the meaning of the analogy together. That goes back to the "shared experiences" point.

Wrapping Up All This Crepe

To finish this off, the only extra magic I try often to employ with my use of analogies is to give you something you didn't quite expect. I love a turn of phrase that you've never heard before because it didn't exist.

Our brains love "new." It's why marketers use the word so often. We want novelty. It triggers a dopamine release. Knowing something is new is like a free drug.

Thus, in using an analogy, don't say the phrase or concept everyone knows. Say something slightly different, or wildly different. And let the other person experience the joy of understanding the analogy.

Helping people feel clever while receiving information can be quite rewarding. It's like getting the perfect jalebi at a market. Still sizzling, sweet but not overwhelming. Perfect.

Like that tasty Indian treat , a great analogy gives us a little spark of happiness mixed into our learning process.

Just like this letter to you. Right?

Chris...