Secrets For Happy Relationship! Valentines Day Bonus Special.

CAN WE BE TRULY HAPPY IN RELATIONSHIPS?

Can we feel, give and receive the unconditional love, and have the honeymoon period for decades and not just the first few months?

Yes, we can!

We can truly thrive, be happy, and feel so much love and fulfilment in our relationships every day! We can achieve the true relationship bliss if we debunk certain myths and misconceptions, acquire new habits and apply the correct formula. If you have the desire to improve your relationship, you will find the ideas and tools in this article that you could consider implementing.

Secrets For Happy Relationships!

The lure of romance is sweet, and many of us are longing to experience the kind of soulful, earth-shaking unconditional love that would transform our lives. To experience this, we have to go inwards; it is our own responsibility and our own journey of internal transformation.

The secrets, ideas, rituals, and habits presented in this article, and my Book: Are We All F*cked?, (Can We Thrive in Life? Can We Be Happy in Relationships?) have been fruitful for millions of people who have implemented them, and for me in my relationship with my wife.

But before I tell you what they are, let me discuss some of the challenges people face in their relationships and how to overcome them.

Most couples, after they have been in a serious, committed relationship or marriage, become complacent, think and feel that now that we are together, I can let myself go.

I don't have to do anything anymore, and I don't need to look after my mind, or body, physical appearance, mental and physical health, or spiritual growth.

I don't need to make any more effort to woo him or her, having a regular date night, finding things to do together spontaneously. After a while, people take each other for granted and become strangers or roommates at best.

People and families live under the same roof as strangers, and no one truly knows much about the other; they are mostly disconnected and plugged in a virtual world through their smartphones or other digital devices.

We are told when we are children to work hard at school to get good grades to get into university, so we can get a good job, and continue to grow and improve at our job or business to contribute more and do better.

Even after we get the job or open the business if we wish to be successful, we continue to learn, go to courses, seminars, workshops, read books, find a coach or a mentor.

We continue to improve and grow so we could contribute more, do better, and produce desired results. If we don't continue to grow and improve every quarter, six months, or every year and do better, we would eventually lose that job or business.

Everyone I have coached told me that; they desire to be in and have a deep, meaningful relationship, full of happiness, and profound love and fulfilment.

Why is it then that a lot of couples stop learning, growing, and improving soon after they are in a serious, committed relationship or marriage?

Logic will tell you that you have to continue to learn, grow, and positively contribute if you desire happy and successful relationships, full of love, joy, fulfilment, and as I call it "The Relationship Bliss".

At the beginning of the relationship, we put our best foot forward, really make an effort, which, if you think about it, feels 'effortless,' and we do our best to woo our ideal, compatible partner.

We make an effort to greet each other with a smile, kiss (or in my case kisses and a long hug), and a hug. We make an effort to get up from the couch and greet our partner at the door as soon as we hear the keys, even if we are watching football or our favourite TV show. Our newly found (ideal partner) is our priority, and everything we do comes from our hearts, love, kindness and compassion.

We are effortlessly conscious in the present moment!

We are effortlessly; courteous, kind, loving, caring, compassionate, understanding, and supportive.

We feel that we are falling in love; our heart is so open and feels deeply happy to feel vulnerable. We might think that the other person is responsible for the way we feel, but the other person was just a catalyst.

These feelings of effortless profound love, overflowing from within us, have always been there, but to feel this kind of love all the time, first, we need to debunk a few myths and misconceptions.

Just as you need to breathe to survive, your love needs a breath of fresh air to flourish and requires constant growth and learning on how to contribute more as a couple to achieve a pure relationship bliss and a magical relationship. Giving your relationship what it needs to thrive is a truly loving gesture.

Myth one: The honeymoon period only lasts for the first few months of the relationship.

What if I told you that millions of couples all around the world are head over heels in love with each other. And continue to be so every day for years? They continue to be so deeply in love even after 10, 20, 30, 40, or even 50 years of relationship or marriage. They live in a relationship full of joy, fulfilment, and the feeling of profound and effortless, unconditional love. How do they do it?

I tell my clients that they have to work on their relationship, that it might feel challenging at first, but like with any new habit, after a while, it becomes effortless. You know all the right things to do and contribute daily from your heart, and it becomes effortless. The only way to create a deep, meaningful relationships, full of deep love, fulfilment, and genuine relationship bliss, is by contributing positively daily and consistently.

Before you give up on your relationship, before you give up on yourself, try and implement the ideas and recommendations listed below for ninety days consecutively.

I promise you that your life and your relationship will improve beyond your wildest dreams.

Remember that the relationship you have with yourself sets the tone of the relationship you have with everyone else. If you want to work and improve your relationship, always start by working on improving yourself first.

At the beginning of the relationship, your heart was so open (that's what happens when we fall in love), and each day you feel more comfortable to open your heart fully and be profoundly vulnerable.

You love your partner very much, but after a while, you begin to argue. When you fight, you might feel insulted or personally attacked, so you retaliate, you begin to close your heart, and mind more, each time you fight.

Creating a magical relationship cannot survive on its own. It requires that both people work daily and contribute positively. It requires the care and nurturing of two adults, giving and contributing to each other in a way that creates a mutually beneficial bond, trust, love, respect, admiration, and appreciation. To create this kind of relationship, magical, sincere, and loving, there needs to be a daily positive contribution:

• Communication, Listening, Honesty, Trust.

Instead of doing some of the trivial activities, like looking at your phone, or watching your favourite show, try to schedule at least 30 min each day (longer if required) for a deep, meaningful conversation. Without regular and daily communication, your relationship will not survive, especially if you have unresolved issues, unexpressed thoughts, and feelings. The more you communicate, the closer you will be, and the stronger the bond and love you will develop. Listening is perhaps more important than talking, try to find out what is going on in your partner's life, how they feel, what are they thinking, what they find challenging, how you could help. Take turns in listening and let the other talk for as long as they need uninterrupted.

Best not to give any advice, just listen and let your partner get things off of their chest. Before you begin, ask if they require any advice at the end of the conversation, or they'd just need you to listen. In most cases they will need you to listen without interrupting.

Good listening requires practice and patience.

Honest communication and good listening allows the person to be vulnerable and creates the strongest bond, trust and love for each other.

Be open and undefended, and willing to be vulnerable. As a result, you will be approachable and receptive to feedback without being overly sensitive about any topic. Their openness also enables you to be forthright in expressing feelings, thoughts, dreams and desires.

Honesty builds trust between people.

Dishonesty confuses the other person, destroying their trust along with their sense of reality.

Nothing has a more destructive impact on a close relationship between two people than dishonesty and deception. When a couple understands each other, they become aware of the commonalities that exist between them and also recognise and appreciate the differences. When both partners are empathic and are capable of communicating with feelings and with respect for the other person's wants, attitudes, and values, each partner feels understood and validated.

Myth two: After the so-called (honeymoon period) people say; I am just too busy, I don't have the time or the energy to do what is required to achieve a fantastic relationship.

• The willingness to work through difficulties and disagreements.

Throwing in the towel, even if you don't walk out the door, is not the path to happiness. You must face the discomfort that comes with differing opinions and ideas. Many difficulties and disagreements commence when we are not able to listen objectively. When a partner is expressing how they feel and we listen subjectively, we will feel personally attacked and we probably retaliate and say something hurtful to the to our partner.

Our partner has the right to have different opinions, thoughts and feelings and express those without being judged or insulted.

We all have the need to feel safe in the relationship to express freely our opinions, thoughts and feelings.

If something is bothering you, and before the difficulties escalate, say the following to your partner: I would like to have 10 minutes of your time to express how I feel, uninterrupted for the benefit of our relationship. If the partner can't do or doesn't feel to do it immediately, schedule the time later that day. At the beginning of the 10 minutes (longer if required) meeting say the following: 'I would appreciate it if you could do me a favour and just listen for ten minutes (or longer) without interruption, you can make comments after I have finished. I have a need to express how I feel and get things off my chest for the benefit of our relationship.

Only start the sentence with "I feel," and never "You make me."

For example, Girlfriend/Wife is upset because she feels boyfriend/husband doesn't give her enough attention and watches sports/football/favourite shows and says the following: When you watch TV for hours I feel sad, I feel that I am not receiving enough attention, I feel upset, I feel neglected, I feel ignored.

Write your own examples and begin with 'I feel' and never 'you made me.' When we have a need to express how we feel, we want to be heard and understood; if we start every sentence with you make me, you made me, the other will feel attacked and will not have heard or understood anything we were trying to express.

For example: I feel upset. I feel unappreciated. I feel sad; when I made an effort to cook for us and made a lovely dinner, you were two hours late because you decided to go to a pub with your friends.

Refrain from sending insulting, angry text messages or screaming and shouting at your partner when they come home. Express how you feel in person only, and always start the sentence with I feel.

Note; giving someone your peace of mind is NOT the same as expressing how you feel. The goal is to express how we feel and not to hurt the other. Insulting Words and Verbal abuse often hurts more and leaves scars for a long time.

Practice communicating respectfully and compassionately, and from a place of love.

Expressing how you feel appropriately as per above improves and strengthens your relationship, love and bond.

Myth three: He/she is my other half? The idea that another person has to come into our lives and fill in our 50% emptiness somehow. Many bought into the idea; that someone out there had the capacity to fill the heart-shaped hole inside of them and to make them complete. No wonder the Cinderella story is so popular.

I believe, and in my 15 years of Relationship Coaching Experience that two individuals are already complete, whole beings, and not two halves who come together to share their life journeys. Each individual is whole on their unique, individual life journey with their personal goals, dreams, and desires striving to grow and improve. Two compatible, whole, individuals meet, fall in love, and besides having their unique individual journeys, they also have a joint journey, with mutual goals, dreams, and desires.

Deep, meaningful relationships are always 100/100. One hundred percent contribution and commitment to the best of their abilities from both people. 50/50 is a transaction.

If both partners are contributing 100% without concern of being paid back, they will have a successful relationship. If we want a successful relationship, then we have to choose love over possession. True love is never 50/50; it is always 100/100.

Myth four: It is my partner's responsibility to make me happy. Make me happy, made me feel this, that or the other. No-one can make you feel anything; your feelings are inside of you. The figure of speech is incorrect in itself. Instead of thinking or saying you made me if you wish to express how you feel, start the sentence with 'I feel.'

You alone are responsible for making yourself feel happy and feel better about yourself by doing the deep internal work. It is not your partner's responsibility, they might be able to assist you and help you on your journey when they are not working on themselves.

Myth five: As soon as you have children, romance begins to die. This cannot be further from the truth. Your partner is your lover first and foremost, and always will be, and just because you had children, they don't suddenly stop being your lover. When you have children, it does become a bit more challenging to find the time and to feel romantic, but it is possible if you make it a priority and contribute unconditionally from love with your open heart.?

Myth six: My partner is responsible to make me happy.Whether we are in a relationship or single, a relationship is usually only as good as our own relationship with our number one: our very own self.?If we don't like ourselves much and are unhappy or are lacking self-love, self-confidence, no amount of love and positive contribution from our partner will help us.

Myth seven: Being miserable in the relationship and arguing all the time, it's normal. Many so-called relationships experts and many books out there talk about how people are arguing and that it is normal and acceptable in a healthy relationship - but I have to disagree strongly.

They present various strategies and steps on how to fight fair. I completely disagree with these views.

The reality is that millions of couples are extremely happy in their relationships and experience unconditional love for decades because they follow the right formula.

There is nothing healthy about fighting in any relationship and should not be accepted or tolerated.

I don't want to have a relationship where I am unhappy, and we argue all the time! I want to be thriving, be profoundly happy, and fulfilled. I want to have an effortless relationship with my wife. I want to have a relationship where I fall in love with my wife deeper and deeper every single day. I want to have a honeymoon period for the rest of my life every single day.

Today, I love my wife more than yesterday, and she feels the same, and we both express this every day.

The kind of relationship where we are both thriving. The sort of relationship where we have such a strong bond and feel loved, appreciated, respected, and understood. A relationship where we truly feel comfortable to open our hearts deeply and fully and feel courageous to experience vulnerability all the time.

I pinch myself every day and ask myself; how could I be so lucky, and I express gratitude to my wife daily, and she does the same. We communicate this every day and have feedback.

This is the kind of relationship we have for the last 8 years and I am confident that we will have for the rest of our lives together.

Love should be unconditional and saying; Thank you for being so amazing confirms to your partner that they don't have to do anything for you in order for you to love them unconditionally and appreciate them. You are acknowledging how amazing they are just for being, for existing in this physical presence, and just for being alive.

Praising each other and giving emotional support has to be worked on to become a daily ritual and a positive habit. We are conditioned to complain, blame, nag, and focus on the negative, to focus on what's wrong and what's missing.

The good news is that these negative habits and rituals are learned and browed from the people who don't have a clue about how to have a thriving magical relationship, and can be changed and improved.

If you are having difficulties in your relationship, and wish to be coached by one of the best Relationships Coaches in the world, yours truly (Eldin Hasa) , DM me on Linkedin, email me at [email protected], visit my website eldinhasa.com or order my book: Are We All F*cked?, (Can We Thrive in Life? Can We Be Happy in Relationships?)

If you keep taking steps in a single direction, you’ll arrive at success faster than you think.

__________________________________________

Ready To Level-Up?

If you want to become extraordinary and become 10x more effective than you were before, check our Formula EQ Academy courses, workshops and events.

The team at?FormulaEQ.com ?lead by by Eldin Hasa & Preston Weekes are experts on Change, Neuroscience, Positive Transformation and Peak Performance.

Let the Formula EQ Genius Academy be your success partner.

Join The Formula EQ Academy

??... Improve your Health, Mindset, Methodology, Motivation and Emotional Intelligence.

Let the Formula EQ Genius Academy Be Your Success Partner!

Join us this Friday LIVE at 4pm UK time, 8am PST, 9am MST, 11am EDT, 9:30pm IST As a guest at the Formula EQ Genius Academy, 1 time FREE guest link:?https://lnkd.in/eEetH8gc

Formula EQ Genius Academy ???? ...www.formulaeq.com ?Teaches the Tools to Thrive in Life & Business and Provides Workshops For Companies, Business Owners, Entrepreneurs, Universities, Schools & Workshops For Children & Parents

___________________________________

? ..Eldin is the Best Coach in London, England, exclusively working with peak performers, high achievers, and high net-worth individuals from the field of business, music, film, and sport. He has clients in 20 countries, delivering unprecedented results for over 15 years, with the Mission to Inspire Humanity to Achieve Greatness by Reprogramming Their Subconscious Mind, and by Overcoming Fear, Self-Doubt, Self-Limiting Beliefs and Adversity.

Having studied Neuroscience for over 30 years, and having expertise in Relationship Coaching, Mental Health, Emotional Resilience and Peak Performance, unless we do the deep internal work to address the root cause of our fears, traumas, anger, worry, resentment, guilt, shame, lack of self esteem, lack of self love we will not be able to heal and build mental or emotional resilience.

If you are having difficulties in your relationship, and wish to be coached by one of the best Relationships Coaches in the world, yours truly (Eldin Hasa) , DM me on Linkedin, email me at [email protected], visit my website eldinhasa.com or order my book: Are We All F*cked?, (Can We Thrive in Life? Can We Be Happy in Relationships?)

I dedicate this article to my amazing wife Nadia Pascal

??.. Much Love

Eldin Hasa