The secret to building career confidence

The agony of inaction

What’s the number one obstacle to unlocking more in your career and life? If you’re struggling to step out of your comfort zone, chances are you’re lacking confidence.

How do I know this? It’s an observation from the clients I’ve worked with over the years so in this article, I delve into what confidence means in this context and what happens when it’s depleted. I wouldn’t be much of a coach if I didn’t offer any guidance on how to climb out of this dark place, so I finish by offering some practical advice on how to turn things around and get your mojo back.

When growth halts

All humans are designed to grow, in fact, every living thing in the world around us is. Think about it, everything is designed to move into the more – higher, stronger, wiser.

What happens when something fails to grow? It gradually perishes.?

It’s the same with us, if we’re not growing, we’re receding. Like walking up a down escalator, the moment we stop walking, we start making our way back to the bottom again. This is when our confidence takes a hit and if we’re not careful, a downward spiral can begin.

Why confidence matters

What do I mean by confidence? It’s the feeling or solid belief in people or plans for the future – the surety that you can rely on someone or something and you can trust that things will turn out for the best.

With a strong sense of confidence in yourself you’ll be able to:

• Step forward boldly.
• Take risks, knowing that no matter what, things will work out.
• Try things out.
• Find a way through, even if it’s tough.

When you’re secure in yourself, you’re able to make creative leaps, brave decisions and live a life aligned with your purpose and principles.

A lack of confidence can lead to:

• Overplanning and what I call analysis paralysis.
• Perfectionism to protect yourself.
• Taking the safe route and staying in our comfort zone.

When we have to keep ourselves in this place of avoidance, we become numb. We can become controlling, shut ourselves away and even become a naysayer of other people’s dreams. It didn’t work out for us, so why should it work out for them?

What does this do to our relationships?

What can you do?

If fear is banging in your ears and you’re not sure which way to go next, you can:

1) Do nothing

This works until it gets so painful and miserable that you have no choice but to give up. It took me seven months to recover when this happened to me, so I don’t recommend this option.

2) Self-build your confidence

It starts with being curious about how unique and amazing you are. A fish doesn’t realise it’s a good swimmer, it just gets on in the ocean doing its thing and we’re the same. Your strengths, skills, experience and physical and emotional makeup are particular to you. Have you allowed them to shine or have you kept them hidden until now? They are your superpowers.

Learn to trust your inner voice. I know that if I’d done this, I wouldn’t have spent seven months of my life recovering from burnout. I’ve found that the most powerful leaders are the ones who trust themselves.

3) Be brave and ask the bigger questions

By asking ‘Why am I here?’ and ‘What have I come here to do?’ we get to the bottom of our wider purpose. This becomes an anchor point that’s much bigger than our insecurities and doubts.

This can be God, the universe or our own intellect – whatever paradigm speaks to us and secures our sense of self and belonging.

Every hero has a guide

Where would Skywalker have been without Obi-wan Kenobi and Yoda? Baggins without Gandalf? Simba without Pumbaa and Timon? The fact that each had someone to direct and lift them did not take away from their inner strength or individuality.?

A guide is someone who champions you and pulls out the gold – they’re in it just to see you succeed. Gather as many of them as you like and ride off their confidence. Allow them to build you up.

This can be a slow burn process or something that happens rapidly but the important thing is that they have the unique qualities you need to reignite your confidence.

Rekindle your flame

Find out how I overcame my recent confidence issues in the latest episode of my podcast, Unlock More. I talk about what was stopping me from getting a project underway last month and what it felt like when my body said ‘no more’ in my late 20s. I couldn’t have gotten over either without listening to my inner voice, asking the bigger questions or finding the right guide for me.

I might be the right guide for you. If you’ve a nagging feeling that you need to unlock more in your life, then get in touch and we’ll arrange a time to chat.