Scared of Change
Jean Marie Beyinda
Frontend Developer | Graphic Designer | Flutter Dev | NextJS Dev | Marketing Expert | YouTuber | Developer | Writer | Teacher
I do have a hard time writing some of these articles because I try to share my thoughts and experiences about specific events from which I gained a life lesson but these lessons might as well be understood or applied differently depending on the circumstances and so my conclusions won't apply to everyone in the same way.
Looking at the topic of today, change is very circumstantially, so what I'll say isn't something definitive but rather part of a wider scope of things or conclusions which could be arrived at. I haven't studied change in dept to be able to bringing a conclusive point of view which you could consider as law, but what I try to do is rather share a little experience I have in hopes it could provide at least a glimpse of the bigger picture. Now with this disclaimer said, lets dive into the subject of today.
I think I speak for everybody when I say we all strive to establish some stability in our lives which subsequently gives us more control as well, except that this sometimes plays against us in the end.
In simple terms the less things change, the more predictable they become and the more control you have over them except for the fact that it also prevents things from getting better and protects things from getting worse.
Change you can't control
Whether you like it or not, time makes things change.
The environment all around you is going to evolve, some people will come and others will go and you will eventually get old. There is some change you definitely can't control but that doesn't stop you from preparing for it. A random event might change your life forever, whether it's a bad decision, a wrong turn or a lucky break. There is very little we often can do to prepare for such changes, and when they do occur, we tend to just deal with it the best we can.
Change you can control
Would you say you are where you need to be right now? Or everything is like you want it to be? Probably not. There are definitely things you can do to make the whole situation better or probably worst. The reason you don't even try is because we are all scared of change to a certain degree.
It pulls us out of our comfort zone and places us in uncharted territory, where we never know when things might go wrong. Maybe you aren't happy where you are right now or maybe you just want things to be different and yet you will rarely take the necessary steps to make that happen.
One event which marked me personally is seeing how a person could put up with a shitty job just because they are scared of looking for something better because they might lose already what they have. Sure there is the possibility of losing what you already have, but there is also the possibility of finding something much better, now it comes down to knowing if the risk is worth it.
When should you change?
When and why should you change. Ideally you want to be in an environment where you don't necessarily feel comfortable but rather one in which you have the most potential for growth. Change should be for the better or leading to the better
The determinant factor should be what leads you to a better future.
Is your neighborhood prosperous? Are your friends valuable? Is your job progressing? etc Things might not be the most comfortable at the moment but you should definitely be aiming for things which help you move forward and for which you do have a plan to eventually become happy and comfortable.
The danger of not changing
The fear of change comes from the fact that we seek comfort in our hearts, mind and environment way too early. In a bid to find stability, we are ready to put up with even the most mediocre living conditions just to ensure we have control. In a bid to protect what we already have, we make decisions without considering the future. There are so many factors which influence our hesitation and resistance to change, ultimately the only deciding factor should be the potential for growth.
Conclusion
I can't tell or convince you about the importance of change, neither can I possibly give a generalized advice for when or how it should be done, but one thing I can tell you is that, it's easy to know if you are making progress or not, just reflect on what has changed from the previous year and if nothing has then maybe you need a change.