Saying how you feel will never ruin a real connection

It depends what your definition and ideas of love is. If you think love is about the intense feeling and emotions, the giddiness and excited, well that's only the first stages of love, in can even be called infatuation. This is the stage where ‘love is blind'. You can't go enough of the other person because you're so “in love”. But sooner or later, that feeling will fade. It fades with mostly everyone. Then that's when real love starts. When you choose to act lovingly with real intentions.

And you're not letting the emotions dictate your actions, but your actions are acting in love no matter what your emotions are. That's true and genuine love. Real love is usually built over time, and you may not feel it immediately. And the feeling of love is usually a result of acting out of love. Are you personally waiting and desiring for those intense emotions for you to experience “real love”?

You could quite possibly have some attachment issues like I do. I know nothing about you, but maybe you’ve been abandoned by someone you never expected, or maybe you’ve been hurt really bad before, either physically or emotionally. People who have attachment issues tend to either express love or attachment at weird and inappropriate times to people, or random people. They can also have difficulties receiving love and like you are experiencing “love not feeling real” to you.

Alternatively, I could be making this way to complicated and you just might be in love in these relationships you talk about. Because you really aren't in love with them. You will know for sure when it happens. Its a whole different feeling. Your mind body and soul will know. For now don't try and force it. Love will come when you least expect it. That is why its so exciting and intense.

But if you are in love with a guy facing depression? Guys are useless at the emotional stuff, they are never taught about it anywhere and always forced to be physically strong. A normal life ensures something like a stereotypical guy portraying himself as strong, beating around others, and just showing his “strength”. When that guy falls in love, he loses all his aforementioned “strength” because now the real power kicks in… “The Power of Emotions”. Most of the times he has no idea what to do, unless he is lucky to have good supporting people to guide him.

Now if this guy is under depression over anything, such as failure in life, loss of loved ones, no love, constant emotional trauma, or all of them, it is really hard to decipher what that person will be like. A couple of times they just become sarcastic, and turn to either social work, poetry/writing, or just into drugs and alcohol. Basically once he loses his internal strength, he does anything to distract himself from all this.

One thing I have noticed about depression is that depressed people have a greater range of emotional face-off. But once that is reached, they may tend to be “spaced out”, i.e., they will immediately forget what they were talking or thinking about. In the long term, this is not good for their retention power and mental health. One more thing is that such people freak out at the slightest touch of love.

This freaking out is basically an emotional breakdown that breaks the wall of emotional self-defense. For people who have never felt feelings, this is a tough one to crack, and you will need to do a lot of work to get past it. However, if your guy has been in love before, be it with a thing or person, this wall might break down sooner than you think. Cheers!