Say "Yes"

It is easier for people to say “Yes” if saying “Yes” is part of the overall culture for the team/company. For example during a brainstorming session participants focus on re-framing their comments in order to expand, not explode other people’s ideas. This proves challenging at first, then quickly everyone gets on board with building, not blocking. As the day progresses people start to have fun and laugh and the ideas flow. Part of this is because we have created a bubble of support. The feelings created by saying “Yes” in a brainstorming session energize collaboration, connection, inclusion and support. Why would we want to relegate these traits to a bubble?

There are times when we need to say “No”. When a life is on the line or someone is putting people in danger, those are definite times to say “No”, but as a culture we say “No” too much and too quickly. We say “No” when we’re busy, we say “No” when it’s a larger conversation than we want to have right now we say “No” when we are scared of change. We say “No” when were mired in the way we’ve always done it. We use “No” to protect the status quo and our own safety. The more comfortable you get in our position and our job and what we do the more we are likely we are to say “No”. “No” stagnates us. “No” eliminates creativity. “No” kills collaboration. Think about the times that you’ve gotten a “No” when they could have said “Yes” just as easily. We’ve already talked about how “Yes” can help us to improve relationships, enhance collaboration and build more trusting teams, but think of all the times you’ve protected status quo and did not need to throw up a road block. A “Yes,&” culture makes the word “No” easier to hear and more intentional.

Once we create a culture of “Yes”, and eventually “Yes. &”, we affirm that we are giving power to collaboration and creativity and a future that is unknown. If we create this culture when we do need to say “No” then it is more thought out and purposeful rather than just a knee-jerk reaction. We also then need to understand why we are saying “No” and explain it to the people we are saying "No" to. Just as important is that we shouldn’t give a thoughtless “Yes” either. We can’t truly say “Yes”, until we know what we are saying “Yes” to and that requires understanding.