For Sale: A home so exquisite, it’s practically a trophy for your perseverance.
- 4 bedrooms, each with its own ensuite bathroom and spacious closet Because nothing says “I’ve arrived” like giving guests (or judgmental family members) their own private space. No more hearing, “Where’s the bathroom?” from Aunt Susan while she side-eyes your life choices. Now, the answer is, “Right in your room, like everything else in this house of dreams.”
- 6.5 bathrooms Why so many bathrooms? Because the old you who once shared a single bathroom with three roommates is long gone. This is for the you that doesn’t just have space—you have options. Upstairs? Downstairs? Poolside? Go wherever your triumph takes you.
- 3100 square feet of open-format living Enough room to host a dinner party for everyone who ever doubted you—or just enough space to twirl around screaming “I DID IT!” without hitting a single wall.
- Sun-filled living room with a skylight The perfect spot for basking in natural light and the radiant glow of your own success. Don’t forget the fireplace—it’s where your insecurities go to burn.
- Sophisticated dining room Perfect for reenacting those family dinners where they asked, “What’s your plan?”—except this time, your plan is “to serve you gourmet meals in my luxury dining room, where I own everything.”
- Gourmet kitchen with top-of-the-line appliances You don’t even have to cook (because you’re successful enough to DoorDash if you want to), but this kitchen exists to remind you that you could. It’s a chef’s dream—just like you’re the dream success story of everyone who ever underestimated you.
- Finished basement The ultimate flex space: Make it a game room, a home theater, or just a storage area for all the participation trophies you no longer need because this house is the only trophy that matters.
- Heated pool with elegant bluestone patio and mahogany decking Because swimming in your own pool is cooler than drowning in self-doubt. Host a pool party and let the mahogany decking whisper, “Yes, this is real wood—just like my accomplishments.”
- Half-acre of park-like property Enough space to relax, reflect, and—let’s be honest—practice your humblebragging. Imagine Instagramming, “Just another day in paradise,” as you sip rosé and watch the squirrels scamper across your lawn.
- Two blocks from Round Pond and walking distance to Sag Harbor Village Ideal for strolls to remind yourself that you’ve made it to one of the most desirable neighborhoods in the Hamptons. Feel free to loudly mention this to anyone within earshot.
- Low annual taxes ($5,500) Proof that even in the Hamptons, your success doesn’t have to come with exorbitant costs. (Unlike those life lessons you learned along the way.)
- Developer will pay the buyer's broker Because even the builder knows this house is a win-win for everyone involved.
This isn’t just a house—it’s a standing ovation to your journey. For under $3 million, this Sag Harbor sanctuary is ready to be yours. So go ahead, invite the doubters, the skeptics, and the nay-sayers. Let them take it all in. You’ve earned it.
