Safe and sound

“Be smart.” “Be aware.” “Text when you arrive.”?

As a young woman, new to living on my own, I quickly learned the parlance of alertness.??

It was baked into my daily life. I planned my transit and walking routes to keep me away from dark corners and alleys. I made sure to cross the street to create a buffer, however small, from isolated pockets. My brain kicked into high gear on foot in and out of underground garages, where I found myself most nervous, especially at nighttime.??

It was my way of trying to avoid harassment, or worse, an attack. It was part of the risk calculus of being a woman alone in public. Actually, not was, it is.?

Gender-based violence has been called an epidemic by advocates, abuse survivors, and governments alike, especially since global rates increased in the last five years. The abuse that tends to happen behind closed doors between people in close relationships is being unveiled and challenged in ways I’ve never seen before in Canada.?

What remains less addressed is the gender-based violence that happens in plain sight: harassment, assault, and targeting that women, girls, and Two Spirit, trans, and nonbinary people face in public and digital spaces every day.?

And what remains nearly unspoken is the ubiquitous gendered vigilance that comes from fear of this harm.?

In a recent national poll, the Canadian Women’s Foundation found that, while many people in Canada are indeed conscious of their surroundings in public, the numbers are especially high for women and 2SLGBTQIA+ people. Nine out of ten women and 2SLGBTQIA+ people take precautions in public to be safe.??

No wonder: 46 per cent of women and gender-diverse people have experienced some form of unwanted sexual behavior in public. That’s nearly double the number of men reporting the same.?

Women are more likely to feel unsafe travelling to and from commonly visited places, walking and running on trails and in parks, going on public transit, and using rideshare apps.??

Fifty-one per cent of men say they feel safe at night in public. Only twenty-three per cent of women and twenty-five per cent of 2SLGBTQIA+ people feel safe at night.??

Women and 2SLGBTQIA+ people are also more likely to adopt risk mitigation strategies in public: checking in and around their car before getting in, keeping keys between their fingers, going out with a buddy or dog, and using only one earbud to hear what’s going on around them.?

These behaviours are considered “being smart”. I learned them from an early age. I know many parents who teach them to their children now. Being smart is a generally a good thing. The problem is that some of us feel we have to be smarter in public because we’re more unsafe due to our gender.??

There’s a fine line between feeling we have to be smarter and being told we have to be smarter, like it’s our sole responsibility and our own fault.??

There’s a fine line between such functional victim-blaming and presuming that unsafety is an unchangeable part of being who we are.?

How do we interrupt this seemingly immovable dynamic? We spotlight the shadowy corners where it lurks.?

AwarePod was launched in November as the first earbud “designed exclusively” for women and gender-diverse people. It’s a lone earbud marketed in place of the pair we’re supposed to use, reflecting that one-in, one-out approach to listening to music and podcasts many women and gender-diverse people do in public.?

Rather than a real product on the market, AwarePod sparks dialogue on the under-spoken ways we guard against gender-based violence in public. It’s the Canadian Women’s Foundation’s way of underscoring and pushing back on the neighbourhood safety “pink tax”.?

My hope is that AwarePod is prompting us to not only notice what goes unnoticed, but also encouraging women, girls, and gender-diverse people to share how they change their behaviour on transit and in campuses, parks, streets, and recreational spaces.

My hope is that it will de-normalize the gendered ways we suppress our enjoyment, participation, and quality of life simply to feel a little bit safer where we live, work, and play.?

We've heard powerful stories from Fallon Farinacci, Kairyn Potts, Ariana Joy Christie, and more. We've received powerful comments from many of you sharing the reality of this you face each day:

• "I always feel like I need a backup plan for my backup plans when I go out at night or even early in the morning in case anything goes wrong."
• "I am aware of my clenched teeth, my held breath, my quicker strides but force myself to adopt a more purposeful demeanor. I walk a tight balance, not trying to be too visible but also to be memorable enough that if something happens, someone will pay attention and intervene for me or be a good witness."
• "Will I ever be able to walk around at night by myself without fear of what lies in the bushes or in the darkness?"
• You can share you story here

Especially at a time when women’s safety, rights, voices, and choices are being so publicly undermined, my hope is that it will move us to change the unchangeable. We all have the right to be safe and sound.