Rolodex Gratitude Ex. #1: Coach to Coach

If this is already looking too long to you, please divert yourself with this micro-soundtrack in a different tab until the reading is over. Making playlists is my almost-analog love language, so I hope you enjoy:

Allow me to share some of the many thoughts I’ve been consumed with lately on the role of coaches in my life.

Amongst quite a few other goings on (I swear!), I've spent the last year contemplating how to be a better mentee to the overwhelmingly generous serving of mentors that the universe has heaped upon me in my 31 years. First and foremost, I’m very certain that engaging with them more often would be a good start.?

That, in part, is why I’m going to spend the next month publishing daily short posts and a few longform articles here on LinkedIn with updates and questions about what I’ve been learning on the subjects of:

Career & artistic fulfillment        

Partnership & executive functioning        

Communication & "organic” network-building        

Personal & product development        

My best-case fantasy for this personal challenge is that I’ll renew and establish connections, foster productive dialogue, and develop material for my eventual chart-topping, world-changing journalistic and memoir publications. I might call the project something like:

#OccupyLinkedIn: 30 Days of Creative Play in our Permanent Workplace        

The worst-case scenario is that we’ll all cringe and I’ll learn some important stuff pretty fast… wouldn’t be the first time in my life!

Would this sort of writing be better suited to Substack? Probably, but we’re all here on LinkedIn already – seemingly FOR LIFE – so this is the plan. Time will tell if a formatting pivot to slide carousels riddled with emoji bullets will be necessary for this to be tolerable. Please, let’s all say a prayer that I don’t end up on r/LinkedInLunatics.

Though, that could be good for virality…

How did it come to this?

It is not because I met coach of coaches Geeta Nadkarni on January 20th that I had the idea to build a regular practice of creative expression. I’ve always had it and haven’t done a damn thing with it.

But my moving forward now – with the goal to build such a practice in public – is certainly a direct result of our having crossed paths, entirely accidentally, at a library in Montreal. It was a total stroke of kismet that only The Artist’s Way could bring about. I’m enormously grateful for it.

Geeta’s life’s work is “making clarity contagious.” I caught her realization that practicing a skill in public is valuable to both oneself and one’s audience.

As I learn a new thing, it won’t cost me anything extra to put my half-baked attempts out there, to source data points I hadn’t considered and to collect real-time objections to the iterations of my thought process. If I’m to be a writer, the skills I need to develop – and fast! – are distillation and clarity.

And for others on a path like mine, my taking a conscious risk to demonstrate authenticity and give a reminder that we all share a right to make mistakes while at play could be influential.

I’ve been violently opposed to participating in sports my entire life, so, up till now and with the exceptions of a few studio art classes and patient-doctor relationships with my childhood allergist, Bernard Feigenbaum, M.D. , and The World’s Greatest Psychiatrist, Jennifer Payne MD, FRCP , pretty much all of the coaching I’ve received has been in professional contexts, so away we go on LinkedIn.

A good coach makes you feel like anything is possible, if only you would just give your best effort. They see you for the human you are, devoid of any pretense, and nurture your unique gifts. They lend you their eyes to see the future.

The first I had was Mrs. Carter-Nicolas, pictured, a special education advocate in Fairfield, Connecticut, who raised me when my mom couldn’t in her K-5 afterschool program. She then gave me my first job throughout high school. For eight pivotal years, she drilled me daily in taking learning and my responsibilities seriously, quite often by way of controversial, Dum-Dum’s-assisted ABA methods.

She passed away in 2009 just before I graduated and left home, but I’m tickled imagining what she’d think about LinkedIn.

Then came:

?? Eileen Carty, MBA , who not only assured me that I could be entrusted with the care of a family unit (hers), but gave me my first notions as to the power of marketing by providing behind-the-scenes glimpses into what drove its early internet-media heyday.?

?? Sarah F. Cates (an exception from academia who, bless her, has no need for LinkedIn), who brought out my voice and pushed me to be rigorously critical about the world around me, while letting me hide from pep rallies in her classroom. Her decision to change career paths so that she could pursue her purpose in a way that didn’t make her miserable was seared into my brain, and, by assigning our wildly-privileged English class Ehrenreich’s Nickel and Dimed, she shaped my values forever.

?? Suzanne Wiseman , who made me see how my college talent for crashing parties could help me make my way in the world and gently coaxed me into exploration.

?? Keith Ryan, MBA , who always believed in me and made it known; who fought for me in (far too many, really) tough spots and showed me how much essential value a Director can provide in a corporate environment.

?? Dawn Horvath , who unfailingly prioritized our practicing together the skills of team leadership, persuasion, and how to be relentless while still being sincerely friendly.

?? Kristen Smith , who is a powerful testament to the growth that finding role models you love, who are just a few steps ahead of you in life, can induce.

?? Rose Raimondo, PCC , who introduced me to her world of Conversations that Count and allowed me to test entirely new skills on her most cherished possessions.

?? Theresa Cox , who made everything possible by inviting me into her court (you might know her as The Queen of eBay) and powering my ambitions with insatiable curiosity and complete faith in my intentions.

?? Diane Lassonde , who has brought me along on her journey to include her far-reaching and deeply-loving community in the most raw chapter of her life, no matter how painful the reality is.

?? Liz O'Kane , who encourages me to always play the entire field and never let politics get in the way of exploring what’s possible when people truly collaborate.

?? Brooke Bains , who constantly models for me that higher-self wisdom can be manifested in the real world to grow harmony and wealth for everyone.

?? Amos Schwartzfarb , who thoroughly dispelled any skepticism I might have had that one individual could be so radically authentic and genuine in offering to help thousands of vulnerable people, all at once and with everything he’s got, while still maintaining healthy boundaries.

?? Clara Albornoz , who exposed me to The Art of War and insists I harness my experiences and aggression to forge new paths.

?? Kwame Boler , who waters the seeds in my brain about building equitable opportunity for others by being an example of 100% mission-driven entrepreneurship.

?? Trish Glenn , who consoles me with her guarantees that “unmitigated disasters” are fruitful opportunities and that it’s ok to be cute.

?? Jake Huber , who agreed to guide me in the trenches of a marketplace launch, even when I flat-out refused his elegant and totally practical accountability frameworks.

?? Noah Spirakus , who knew I needed a deadline in order to make one of my hardest decisions ever.

?? Heidi Hubbeling Leach , who shocked me with her ability to operate with profound generosity and compassion while in a position of power.

?? Kimberly Dorneval , who graciously taught me the importance of stable foundations when accepting new responsibilities.?

?? Swati Khanna , who validated my emotions and artfully demonstrated how to hold fleeting team structures together with a hug.

It’s a pleasure to introduce you all to one another and to the rest of my personal, professional internet.

If only you could all meet Delma! I’m counting on my life's coaches, as per usual, to share wisdom with me as I continue to develop whatever the hell it is I'm doing, to offer feedback on my work and answers to my questions whenever possible, and to come visit with me in Montreal (or on Voxer or on a Google Meet) any time. Clearly, I’ve got a fair bit of time at the moment.

I can sincerely promise my posting will get a LOT shorter as we go. My wildest dream is that you will be inspired to build your own creativity where we can all benefit from it, too.