The Role of Humility in Leadership

A reminder that, most often, effective leadership is bought, not sold.

Like many of you, I am fiercely loyal to?my university alma mater, Boston College, particularly its sports teams. For a number of years in the mid 2010s, it pained me to see its (American) football team grossly under achieving on the field.

During that time, it became clear to fans that our head coach, though he possessed a big personality and talent for excessive bluster and?coach speak, was quite inept at managing strategy on the field once the game started.

Then, after continued poor performance on the field and diminishing interest from students and alumni, a change in leadership was mercifully made. And after a nationwide search, a new head coach, Jeff Hafley, was selected. While he came highly regarded and has held key assistant positions in both the professional ranks as well as college, this was his first time leading an entire team.

With some more than mild interest, I watched the short?press conference?introducing our new, ambitious young coach.

Within no more than five minutes of his introduction, I was a buyer. Not only did I come away energized about the future of the program, I also learned a surprisingly valuable lesson in what makes a strong leader.

In what was, no doubt, one of the biggest and most high profile moments of his professional career, the new coach showed something I did not expect:?genuine humility.

He was humble in talking about each success he had along his journey. He took time to thank each mentor (by name) that helped him as he navigated his career path. He got emotional when describing his gratitude towards his parents, siblings, wife and young daughters (who were present) for believing in him when he had his own doubts.

And then he invited players, students, alumni and fans to join him to help make big things happen.

“Get in” is what he said.

This is how we were introduced to this man (who, interestingly, is now likely the highest paid employee at the school).

It would have been easy in these moments for him to spout cliches or thump his chest or make promises and tell everyone the things they wanted to hear. Instead, he chose to show strength by making himself vulnerable and accessible – and asking for our help.

And those who watched and were vested in the success of the program all had the same reaction:?I am in.

Too often our leaders feel that they need to sell (and sometimes oversell) themselves and their accomplishments to show strength and get people follow them.?

But doing so really serves one main purpose – to make the leader feel good and more confident about themselves. It has little to do with the followers.

Showing humility as a leader can have a much more profound effect – it invites those that choose to follow to be invested as stakeholders in the leader’s (and, ultimately, the team’s) success. It also proves that people don’t need to be sold on someone’s ability to lead – they will feel inspired to buy in on their own if the message is delivered genuinely. I think this is important for everyone who is tasked to lead people at one time or another to understand.

A few years now have passed. COVID made Coach Hafley's first season more challenging than expected, and the program and its culture continues to rebuild and improve. There are no certainties that this will end up any better than it did with the other guy. But there continues to be positive signs and a hopeful vibe. I am pretty confident that he is going to do everything possible to figure out how make success happen. For that, I am willing to continue to?get in?and get onboard….Hell, might even buy season tickets this year…

XOXO

Dave

This was adopted from the December 21, 2019 intro to my weekly "Friends of Dave" newsletter, which is accompanied by interesting links I curate each week. If you would like to see past full issues, please click here?>>>?https://www.getrevue.co/profile/davidafrankel