The Role Human Design Played in Getting 'ME' Back.

January 31st, 2022 is a day I will never forget. It was the day I made the top 20% in my network marketing business and burned everything to the ground. You see, on paper, I had it all; the house, the marriage, the job, the business, the baby. From the outside you'd never think anything was less than perfect but on the inside, I was praying for a way out.

Let me take you back to the beginning...

I have a 16-year career in commercial real estate. When I got started in the industry I was 21 years old, fresh out of college, and had no idea what the "real world" was like. I learned quickly what it would take to be successful as a woman in a male-dominated industry:

• Long hours - Even though I was done with all my tasks I was expected to stay in the office until my boss was done with her day (I used to take my sister's ADD medication to stay awake on the almost all-nighters).
• Time away from family - I was told that if I wanted to succeed & climb the ladder, I would need to hire a nanny to care for my kids so I could do whatever it takes. I was 23 when I was told this.
• Suppress my emotions - "Never let them see you cry". The expectation was to always be happy, always play nice, and be the "good girl".
• Put your head down, work hard, and they'll notice - I worked myself to the ground and was never appreciated or recognized for the hard work I was doing.
• Always be available - PTO? Oh no, honey. That doesn't exist when climbing the ladder! Grind, hustle, never stop.

16 years of that shaped me as a woman in business and created a deep-rooted belief system of what success meant, which led me to every breakdown, panic attack, and burnout episode.

The craziest part was that all the breakdowns, trips to the ER, and burnout episodes felt normal to me. I just thought it was part of the success and growth process. I truly did not think anything was wrong until the world shut down in 2020.

Maybe you felt like this too but it was the first time in so many years that I felt like I was able to breathe. It was the first time I had time to be still, reflect, and slow down. It was extremely uncomfortable at first since I was addicted to the hustle and grind. I embraced it though, because I was pregnant with my first child so the slowdown was much appreciated.

I'll spare you the details and give you the cliff notes version - The slowdown didn't last long and after my son was born I continued to hustle and grind as soon as I got back from maternity leave. This time, things felt different. I felt myself pushing back against my belief system that to be successful I had to do all those things I mentioned above. I was looking for a way out, a way to get more out of life because truth be told, I was NOT happy. That's when I started my network marketing business. Thinking that was the ticket out, I poured everything I had into it, and guess what? I repeated the same. old. patterns.

January 31st, 2022 was the day I said, " If this is what success feels like, I don't want it!" I'd had enough and at that point, I was unwilling to repeat old patterns. I was on the verge of quitting my job, a career that I loved because I was so burnt out and unhappy. Luckily, I met someone through the network marketing world who introduced me to Human Design. That was the first day of the rest of my life.

One of the first things I learned about myself through Human Design was that as a Manifesting Generator (my energy type) I am designed to be able to multi-task and have many things on my plate without burning out, as long as I enjoy doing those things. That meant, saying no more often to things that did not light me up inside.

For a woman who has been doing the most to receive approval, validation, and potential promotions, this was a hard pill to swallow. I had no idea how I was going to change this behavior but I knew I had to. So I just decided to lean in because burning out and being miserable was no longer an option.

Here are the BIG baby steps I took to turn my life around:

• I made a list of things I am good at and love. I then called a meeting with my bosses and let them know I wanted things to change and I wanted to focus more on certain things that would not only bring more value to the company but would take more off their plate while providing me the fulfillment I needed to continue being an asset.
• I started practicing saying no to my friends and family. As a manifesting generator, the way I best make decisions (this is different for everyone) is by listening to what my gut is saying and feeling. So if my friends asked me to do something, I would tune into my first gut reaction. If I was excited, I'd say yes, if it felt like a burden or obligation, I said no. This gave me back my power, energy, and time. I was so much happier the more I practiced this because, with time, the guilt I felt melted away as I saw my mental and emotional health improve.
• I had conversations with my husband about my needs based on my design. I needed to prioritize things that made me truly happy and brought me joy so that I could be my best for him and my son. That meant, resting when my body craved it, being more spontaneous as a family & couple, and asking for help instead of doing everything on my own.
• I created boundaries around my energy. One of the most profound things I learned about myself (that wasn't a surprise) is that I take on other people's emotions and feelings and not only amplify them but wear them as if they were my own. This was a huge realization for me that helped me protect my energy at work, especially around other people's drama. I was very choosy as to who I was listening to and what conversations I was having.
• I learned my purpose, which is to strip away tension in my mind & body to create success more quickly & easily(all in my human design chart). So, I started to work on values and goals directly in line with my purpose. Do I want the big corner office? Do I want more flexibility and freedom in my career? What is the most important thing to me in this life? What is it that I value more than anything? What does my dream life look like and what steps can I take to make it a reality?

It has been two years since I started implementing and embodying my human design. Since then I have:

• Negotiated a higher-paying job (40% income increase) with more freedom & flexibility than I ever thought was possible.
• Started my coaching business to help other women with similar stories find peace and freedom.
• Filed for divorce & started to plan life as a single mom of one amazing little toddler.
• Reconciled with my husband & prioritized our healing & marriage.
• Prioritized my family while still making time for myself and my social life.
• Coped with my mom having cancer & my sister almost going into kidney failure due to Lupus complications.

All of that and more has happened in the last two years and I didn't burn out. I was able to feel the feels, process all the emotions, and move forward in confidence knowing that I no longer operate out of fear or expectation; I operate from a deep inner knowing of who I am and what I stand for.

Human Design helped me regain my time and energy so I can truly have it all, on my terms, in my way.

This is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to Human Design AND it is a great indicator of what is possible for you.

If you are ready to get to know yourself at soul level and take the big baby steps to create the life you've always dreamed of - where you CAN have it all and it feels good too - sign up for a free Human Design work/life audit here.

Next week we will continue diving into Human Design by getting into the five different energy types and how they affect leadership. You won't want to miss it! I'll be sharing my biggest leadership tips :)

xoxo- Alex