Risk and Reward in the Arctic

ANWR (https://www.protectthearctic.org/history-of-the-arctic-national-wildlife-refuge)

-????????Matthew Putnam August 7, 2022

no talk of bucket lists. we already have, a full share, and making some list, would reveal, past good fortune,?and make the next trip, more indulgence, than deserved adventure

nonetheless, we persisted, found time, found permits, found a guide, and a year’s planning led, to in-person meet up, staging packs, splitting food, tents and boats, and paddles

and bear spray, which is, supposedly more effective, than bullets, and there are stories?about shot grizzlies, still killing, the shooter... so bears remain an uncertainty. as much as the flight up canyon, and over the divide, that first proves impossible, separating us from our plan, placing us off the map, after a separate pass led, over the divide to a defunct gravel bar, collapsing, with the melting permafrost

on the ground, now five alone, utterly silent, once the helio, disappeared into clouds

hiking without trails towards a pass, another valley, days away, within minutes of leaving?our first stream crossing, remembering the warning ... “your boots will be soaked”

and thinking myself smart, for tall boots, and tall gaiters, but only smart for awhile, because the streams, are cold, and fast, and deep, and more than slightly, dangerous?

and this is within minutes?

then camp, and tents, and mosquitos, and rain, and snow, and realizing we’ve camped on, melting tundra, so we build a boardwalk, to stand on, round the cooking fire, and eat cheese noodles, camp food

dreams, weird memories, of work's trifles

snow again

planning the hike, over the pass, our path is not on the map, the obvious route, a dead end, a new route, hard

we are slow, older than our guide, he humors us, his skills lighten our packs, from 60 to 50, pounds

he never says, you were warned, we know

and we thought, we were ready, but variably so, and none of us, could have stepped?up, to guide but we were, ready enough, to move forward, slowly

so we did, thru insects, weather, brush, following caribou trails, past their sheds, past grizzly scat, and fresh prints, in the snow, and the mud, across rushing streams, across Aufeis, getting knocked over, and wet ... miraculously avoiding a motion stopping injury

and then we’d gone, as far, as hiking allowed, and we needed, the boats

rivulets, to streams, to rivers, braided, some named, now moving fast. in real rapids, fall out, catch a boot underwater ... same effect as a grizzly – dead

the beauty is all around now, the river running, where glaciers ran before, overseen by unnamed peaks, a mile above

when we see, the grizzly, up close, it is stunning. Downstream, maybe 200 yards, the river too big, for us to cross, the grizzly, swims and bounds to the opposite bank, in five seconds, leaving no doubt, as to who, is on top ... but today, we are not, on the menu

later we catch, and eat, a Dolly Varden, and again see, caribou, up close, and on this night, share our camp, with an arctic hare, who ignores us, while eating, the greens, along the river’s bed

we have to leave, we are not in a place where, 48er’s can live, we’d need native blood, and skills ... we have neither

so we leave, hoping to return ... memento’s in our pocket, pictures captured, memories of, mountains unending, water gathering, wolves calling, working together, following a path, unknowable, uncertain,

yet ... perfect?

Some travel can change your life. Maybe there is such a thing as the risk-reward ratio being important in travel. One friend on this trip and I uncovered the SAR years ago - satisfaction/aggravation ratio. The idea being to keep it above 1. Of course it helps to set expectations in advance and for this trip we all knew we'd be sleeping on the ground, without facilities, without comfort, with cold feet, with many biting insects, needing to keep our personal canister of bear spray with us at ALL times, and carrying a darn heavy pack. Despite all of that this trip qualifies - in my book - as fun ... and life changing. You meet wilderness head on and experience what real explorers experience - for a time.

A great book on the region is Arctic Dreams by Barry Lopez (https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16878.Arctic_Dreams). All of the book is worth reading and many passages stand out. This is one: "A Chipewyn guide named Saltha once asked a French priest what lay beyond the present life, "you have told me heaven is very beautiful," he said. "Now tell me one more thing. Is it more beautiful than the country of the muskoxen in the summer, when sometimes the mist blows over the lakes, and sometimes the water is blue, and the loons cry very often? That is beautiful. If heaven is still more beautiful, I will be glad. I will be content to rest there until I am very old.""