Rhododendron.

Nothing makes me feel more like a grown-up than having a garden.? Except maybe knowing things about gardening.? Gardening knowledge is some serious grown-up stuff in my book!??

Finally, in my midlife, I have shed my black thumb and replaced it with some super charged knowledge about flora and fauna.? In my ultimate pride, I can now walk down the street and call the rhododendrons by name.? I can tell the forsythia from the hydrangeas and the rosemary from the lavender.? I feel so adult-like when I look at the plants around me and know which need more shade, less water, or better pruning.??

I want to scream, ? “Look at me and my plant knowledge!? Total grown-up over here!”??

Naturally, I have been testing out my new found plant skills by expanding my gardens at home.? It has been fun but, like all fun things, there is a catch.? A big one.??The. Work. Never. Ends.??

Just as I finish weeding the section at the top of the house, the weeds at the bottom of the house are already back! ? After I finish dead-heading all the annuals, the next day there will be a hot sun and dozens of little blooms will shrivel up and need to be removed.? Once I put that “last” bush in the ground, I will notice another little section that could also use a few new bushes next season.? And so on.??

I am still waiting for the day that I wake up and think, “The garden looks perfect!? I am done now.”

Recently, I was sharing with (complaining to) my mom about my never ending weeds and the workload of my garden.??

She tried to suppress a little laugh and replied,? “Well honey, I think that’s what gardening is.”

Bingo.? Her offhand comment hit me hard.? Never ending work.? That is exactly what gardening is. That is exactly what life is.?

Never ending work to produce growth.?

You plant the seeds and see what grows, and what doesn’t.? You prune back what becomes unruly.? You move things around until you find the environment that best suits.? You remove the weeds and cross your figures.? Then you do it all again.? With consistency and practice it gets easier and the results better.? Hopefully.? But the work is never done.??

Such is life.??

We try things and we see what works for us, and what doesn’t.? We try on different personalities, locations, and friendships.? We keep trying and in the process learn what suits us and what does not.? We prune things back and we grow.? Problems pop up.? We deal with them and cross our fingers. ? We grow a beautiful life and then a storm comes and makes us start over.? We do it again and again.? Over time we learn and, hopefully, the results get better and the burdens lighter.? But the work is never done.????

There is no day coming when I wake up and say, “That’s it!? Life is perfect now! I am done!”??

The core purpose of a garden is to grow; to become bigger than yesterday.? The core purpose of a human is the same.?

It is a blessing to not be finished, to not be perfect.??

Life is infinitely more exciting when purpose and accomplishments are not only behind us, but also ahead!? Indeed, growth is the whole point.

When I get frustrated that things are not where I want them to be yet (still working on what I want to be when I grow up?), or that today is feeling too much like yesterday (laundry again?), I try to remember the garden.??

The garden is not perfect but it is beautiful.? Even on the ugliest of days, at the very least, my garden is full of potential.??

So maybe the real measure of being a grown-up is simply realizing that we never actually arrive?? That our life is the practice?? Well, maybe that and being able to spell rhododendron.