Reunion with your inner child

What is an inner child?

Let us imagine that your inner child is the young you. Think of your inner child as the kid you were in the past. Your inner child can be the young you from the age of 1 to 13 years for instance. It is up to you to choose what time you want to go back to. Your inner child is the childlike aspect of your inner Self. It is deep in your brain and continually reminds you of suppressed feelings or neglected needs from your childhood.?

Our inner child is that box in our psyche that stores all of our emotional experiences from our childhood; it is like the wounded parts of yourself. Your past experiences, unmet needs, and all of our suppressed emotions that live in our mind. It is the lens through which we experience our current reality.

One important thing to know is that we all have an inner child, even if you are 70 or 80 years old. Each and every one of us is unique in their own type of way but we are all similar. We are human beings that have basic needs to be met. One of those needs is called love.

When a mother gives birth to a beautiful baby, that baby doesn’t know the ego yet. It knows we are all one and that nothing is separated. That baby comes full of love with a sponge brain. Anything the baby sees or hears will just be absorbed as it is, no filters. Here you can start seeing how important it is to know what you saw when you were so young. What could you have possibly heard or seen??

As children, we are so pure and so innocent. We don’t ask for much. What we want is unconditional love from those around us and mostly our parents. Sometimes we get that love in the form of attention, physical touch like hugs and kisses, food, safety, and/or playfulness. At times, we get none of that. Who is at blame? No one is. Everything is meant to be and there is no coincidence.?

It is no one’s fault if we experienced that childhood. Some of you might have had an absent parent whether physically or emotionally. Both have big effects on your inner child. There is not much of a difference when your dad was 20 hours in his office or if he died when you were very young. In both cases most probably he wasn’t there for you, maybe to hug you, kiss you or to see you do your thing. This small example can show you how unmet needs are created.

?If we go on through life without healing our inner child, we will sometimes find ourselves in extremely toxic relationships whether at work or with your partner. It is due to fact that you didn’t fill those needs before getting into a relationship. As many wise people have said, it all starts within. So how come some of us still think happiness is found outside? We search for happiness in cars, clothes, houses, money, fame, status and much more. All of which are external factors that can give you short term happiness. In the long run you will find yourself wanting more and more. Nothing will ever be enough for you if you don’t go within. What I mean by going within is to heal your inner child. To face your fears, your insecurities, your limiting beliefs and to make your unconscious become conscious. Just like Carl Jung said: “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”?

Now that you know what an inner child is, you might be thinking to yourself: “And what now?” It is time to start connecting with your inner child.

You can start connecting with your inner child by practicing the exercise below:

1-?????For the people born in the 1990s and below, you can search for old pictures of yourself when you were a kid. Search in old albums in your house, in your grandparents’ houses or maybe your friends’ houses. For the people born after the 2000s, you can search in your old phones or old laptops or wherever you had them stored. For you to have a better experience, it would be great if you can find pictures where you are looking at the camera. That way you can look right into your eyes.

2-?????Now that you have found some pictures, choose one that you feel it reminds you of hard moments from your past. An era where you felt you lacked love, a time where you felt like you were bullied or made fun of. Choose a picture that takes you back to those times were you felt lonely, insecure, broken. I know it might be scary to do so but for us to heal we need to face our fears. You don’t have to relive the experience, it is about letting go of the emotion associated with the experience.

3-?????After you have chosen the picture, find a quite place where there are no disturbances. A place where you can fully be yourself.

4-?????Hold the picture in your hand and look into your inner child’s eyes. Stare at him/her with love and just smile at him/her. You can see the innocence in his/her eyes. Look at your inner child’s purity. He/she is just a child that wanted to be seen, heard and loved.

5-?????Tell your inner child: "I see you, I hear you and I unconditionally love you." Repeat this for 10 times.

6-?????Hug the picture as if you are hugging a child you love.

7-?????Last but not least, tell your inner child that he/she is safe and that it is not his/her fault if certain things happened in the past. A child is an innocent creature that wants to be safe and secure. Talk to your inner child about anything you want and let your inner child know that this time you won’t forget about him/her and that you will always be there for him/her.

Remember that you can practice this exercise as much as you want. Also note that you can use different pictures from time to time. This way you can cover all of your childhood and teenage years.

God bless you all and I send you a big hug from my side.

#innerchild #compassion #emotionalintelligence #unconscious #ego #mentalhealth #selflove #love