The Return of Body Language

Over the last few weeks, I had the pleasure of interacting with talented students at Washington and Lee University and Vanderbilt University , and with new Financial Analysts in the Wells Fargo Middle Market Banking 2022 class.?The intellect, ambition and curiosity was impressive, and representative of this generation of rising stars.

One development opportunity for this generation (and all of us), is to focus on the “lost” art of body language. which was slightly diminished during the virtual WFH period caused by the global pandemic.?

After all, experts estimate that 65% of our communication comes from body language, so improving our self-awareness and ability to read others will enhance the quality and success rate in a variety of interpersonal engagements.?

For example, improvements in this art will…

• help product experts to better calibrate the appropriateness and timing of pitching non-traditional ideas to clients by sensing their current emotional state.?
• help relationship managers to better determine when to talk business, or when to just have a friendly chat.?
• help deal makers to better understand what has triggered anxiety/obstacles during a complex negotiation.
• help managers to identify unique wellness and productivity challenges.
• help leaders to determine the impact of changing culture and policy decisions.

I’m currently listening to an intriguing book called?“What Every Body Is Saying”?by Joe Navarro , a legendary FBI agent who has written 12 books on the subject of nonverbal cues.? It's an excellent book if you want to improve in this area. “...we evolved as a species to communicate non-verbally…a text message can’t supplant a nice smile, hug or head tilt…”

In the book, Mr. Navarro points out many cues/insights that he used to determine what people were “really saying and feeling” during some of his professional interrogations.

Here are a few simple examples of how we may be “heard” without saying a word:

• Head tilt = Receptivity.?
• Hand Steeple = Confidence.
• Pursed Lips = Thinking of alternatives / in disagreement with whatever was just said.
• Hand moved to cover neck = Feeling vulnerable, threatened or uncomfortable.?Evolutionary response to large feline hunting tactics!
• Foot patting, nail biting, hand-wringing = Anxiety, and a “calming down” mechanism”.
• Covering eyes in any gesture = Something is causing discomfort/bothering person.
• Arched eyebrow = Genuine enthusiasm.
• Open hand, instead of the index finger, to point at a person = Communicates “we”, versus “you”.

Can you imagine the enhanced effectiveness if you observed and adjusted for these cues in the midst of a face-to-face negotiation, performance review, consulting or social engagement?

Another simple recommendation that I make to junior professionals entering the workplace is to immediately start to develop their "presence" in new business and social situations; Executive gravitas, or "bearing" as we called it in the military. It was always intriguing to watch a General or Admiral enter into the room.... So, without any words, do you want to immediately improve your ability to project an executive presence…and have the charisma to walk into a crowded room and own it?

Start by improving 3 simple behaviors:

1. Give ~2 seconds of warm & deliberate eye contact with each person as you move into the room.
2. Share a genuine smile (not a “crazy like a clown” or beauty pageant smile, but more an “Easy like Sunday morning”, George Clooney “smirk”).
3. Project an open, expansive body posture.

Why should every professional, regardless of seniority, re-invest in this type of self-development??

It will elevate the quality of our interactions, and we will better inspire trust and connectivity with clients, team members, family and friends!?