Rest without anxiety: why do we blame ourselves when we go on holiday

The vast majority of people nowadays talk about how important it is to be productive, but the importance of rest has somehow been relegated to the background. Which, of course, is wrong, because you need to rest just to stay productive.

What is a real rest like??

Before we start talking about why we blame ourselves for holidays and how to learn how to spend them without anxiety, let's understand what we mean by a holiday in general. Many people mistakenly think that the time in which we do not work is the holiday. But that's not really true.

Real rest is the time that is aimed at restoring internal resources. And, of course, it does not begin immediately after you finish work. In our life rest is actually given quite little space and time: from work you still need to get home, cook dinner, help your child with lessons and walk the dog. And all this is also activities, but quality rest can be, for example, sports, reading, watching films, travelling, walking. In general, anything that you do for yourself and get pleasure, inspiration and energy.

But why don't we know how to rest?

Apart from the fact that for some reason we have suddenly started to blame ourselves for resting, there is a whole trend among professionals to combine work and holidays. Some people don't just finish their tasks, but stay in touch all the time, answering work emails and participating in calls. The only question is, why have we suddenly lost the ability to rest and how are we badly affected by the lack of rest and holidays?

?This kind of workaholism is due to several factors. Firstly, the pandemic and remote working have had their impact. When you stay at home and communicate with colleagues only online, the boundaries between work time and rest time become blurred.

Secondly, being constantly connected at work is a kind of grounding and a sense of ground under your feet. Some people fear losing that stability and contact with their team over the holiday period. Although, of course, even over a few weeks' holiday this is unlikely to happen.

Thirdly, the reason for the trend of "under-vacation" was the shortage of staff on the labourmarket. Due to a shortage of workers, some employees have taken on several roles at once, and, consequently, their tasks have become much more numerous. In such conditions, it is very difficult to afford a proper holiday, because too many work processes depend on employees.?

Okay, where does the guilt come from? Most often it is connected with unrealistic expectations and attitudes, such as that rest is about laziness, and it is incompatible with productivity. Today, our image of a successful person does not correlate with rest in any way: the propaganda of "successful success" is to blame. Influencers earn millions, sleep two hours a night, exercise, eat right, and still work. Immediately you get the idea: "The more you rest, the further you are from your success".

And, of course, there's the separate story that rest must be earned. This attitude dates back far into our national past. It is because of it that we think that you can rest only after you have achieved something. Otherwise, you will be considered a slacker.

How to rest without feeling guilty

?You should definitely go on holiday, because lack of rest directly affects your productivity, emotional and physical state. Scientists, by the way, have even found out that those who often go on holiday are much less prone to depression. So how can you learn how to rest without feeling anxious and with benefits for yourself?

1. Set boundaries. To reduce the degree of pre-vacation anxiety, start planning it as early as possible. Firstly, warn your colleagues and boss that you will only be in touch for urgent matters. Second, find those who can pick up some of your tasks and replace you if there are questions about projects. It's best to make a checklist of the cases you'll be delegating. And also don't forget to switch off notifications in your work chats and set a chop in your emails so you definitely don't get distracted.

2. Start keeping an 'anxiety' diary. Fighting anxiety won't bring visible results if you work with the effect rather than the cause. To monitor your condition, try to record everything that makes you uncomfortable. You can do this at the end of each day: think of everything that happened and what emotions this or that situation provoked.

3. Use proven tools. If someone advises you to exercise, meditate or take a hot bath, don't roll your eyes. All of these things, of course, are talked about so often that they begin to seem disconnected from reality. They work great in practice, though. In fact, sport helps fight stress hormones, and deep breathing is a great calming influence.

4. Work with your anxiety. One of the reasons why anxiety prevents us from resting is that we have a habit of fearing it. This only increases stress. And, if we treat anxiety as something that can ruin our holiday, we unwittingly give it even more power over us. If you realise that it's difficult to cope with it on your own, don't hesitate to seek professional help.

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