Response-ability includes no response sometimes

Following up on last week’s discussion on the ability to respond (You can find that here: https://www.dhirubhai.net/pulse/your-response-ability-responsibility-john-dallas-j4xze), there is another way we can respond that I think resonates with a lot of people, and that is no response at all. ?There are times that we either can not or should not respond. ?For example, in the case of road rage, it is best to not respond. ?And that goes for both sides. ?If you feel it, please take a deep breath and realize that the asshole who cut the line of politely waiting cars is not worth the stress or time to think about them any more. ?Another time is all those unsolicited emails you get in a day. ?Some are legitimate sales people, but that doesn’t mean you should respond to all of them. ?And, the ones that look like spam or scams are better off just reported to your IT department and deleted. ?

There are other times when it is not productive to respond. ?When faced with unproductive arguments, the ones that aren’t going anywhere and both sides are camped on their positions, employing strategic tactics to refrain from responding can be key to maintaining composure and focusing on constructive communication. One effective tactic is to practice the art of silence, allowing a pause for reflection rather than engaging impulsively. Additionally, choosing not to escalate the situation by avoiding personal attacks and emotional reactions can de-escalate tension. There is a quote by Victor Frankl that comes to mind “Between stimulus and response there is a space. ?In that space is our power to choose our response. ?In our response lies our growth and our freedom”.

Redirecting the conversation towards common ground or shared goals can shift the focus away from unproductive disagreements. Setting clear boundaries for respectful communication and disengaging when those boundaries are crossed can also prevent the argument from spiralling into unproductive territory. Finally, prioritizing in-person or private discussions over public forums can provide a more conducive environment for resolving differences without unnecessary public scrutiny. In essence, the key is to approach unproductive arguments with a thoughtful and intentional strategy that prioritizes constructive dialogue over reactive responses.

Another concept I came across while researching this week is Constructive Criticism Fatique. ?It can set in when individuals find themselves consistently bombarded with well-intentioned feedback, leaving them feeling overwhelmed and emotionally drained. While constructive criticism is essential for personal and professional growth, an excess of it without enough time for reflection and implementation can lead to diminishing returns. We need to be able to fail, get feedback, try again, be recognized for trying and then we might want another round. ?For those giving the feedback, keep this in mind! ?

This fatigue can manifest as a reluctance to engage with feedback, a sense of being constantly under scrutiny, or even a decline in self-esteem. To address constructive criticism fatigue, individuals may benefit from setting boundaries, allowing themselves time to absorb and apply feedback gradually, and seeking support from mentors or colleagues to navigate the process of self-improvement. Balancing constructive criticism with positive reinforcement and acknowledging one's achievements can also contribute to a more balanced and sustainable approach to personal development.

I hope you have a good day and week ahead and remember that, sometimes, the most impactful response is silence. Embracing moments of quietude allows for essential downtime, fostering both self-respect and respect for those around us. Cherish the balance between engagement and contemplative stillness, recognizing the strength that emerges from thoughtful pauses in our interactions. And remember that People Power Everything.

John

PS: If you like these, feel free to forward and encourage your friends, family, neighbours, colleagues, leaders, staff, and even mortal enemies to subscribe to the People Power Everything Podcast (Version Francophone) which has bonus material from time to time. ?You can also reach out to me at [email protected]