The Respect Pendulum: Pushing Beyond Limitations

“You must find the courage to leave the table where respect is no longer being served” ~ Unknown

Once upon a time in a lush forest, there resided a community of animals who valued respect above all else. Among them was a young squirrel named Sia, known for her daring spirit and unwavering commitment to earning the respect of her fellow creatures and respect for herself.

Growing up, Sia had always felt like an outsider in the forest.

Despite her best efforts, she often felt overlooked and underestimated by the other animals. She didn’t truly understand what she was missing in being able to stand shoulder to shoulder with the other animals. She yearned to prove herself, to show she was capable of greatness like any other creature in the forest.

In the centre of the forest stood a majestic oak tree, towering above all others. This tree, known as the “Respect Pendulum” symbolised the pinnacle of respect in the animal kingdom.

Legend had it that whoever could climb to the top would not only earn the admiration of their peers but also gain a deeper understanding of the true meaning of respect.

Many animals had attempted to climb the Respect Pendulum, but none had succeeded. Some had faltered halfway, whilst others had given up in fear. Yet despite this knowledge, Sia remained determined to prove to herself and others she was worthy of being respected.

With unwavering determination Sia embarked on her journey to conquer the Respect Pendulum. Training tirelessly, pushing herself beyond limitations, honing her skills as she went. Perseverance prevailed as she encountered obstacles and setbacks yet she never forgot her commitment to herself.

Climbing higher and higher she could feel all eyes of the animal kingdom upon her, watching with bated breath, her courage and commitment to succeed. The animals were blown away with her determination and courage to surmount the challenge she had set herself.

Finally, she reached the summit, and at the top of Respect Pendulum she felt the accomplishment of what she had achieved. She knew with every fibre of her being that she had not only earned the respect of the whole kingdom in the forest but she respected herself.

The animals in the forest realised along with Sia, that true respect is not given but earned through courage perseverance and unwavering determination.

The Respect Pendulum

The concept of a "respect pendulum" isn't a widely recognised metaphor, that discusses how respect might fluctuate or vary in intensity in relationships, societies, or within oneself over time.

Understanding and managing the "respect pendulum" involves recognising the factors that influence these swings and striving for equilibrium. This requires ongoing effort, communication, and reflection to foster environments and relationships where respect is consistently upheld, despite the inevitable fluctuations in circumstances and behaviours.

“There is no respect for others without humility in one’s self” ~ Henri Frederic Amiel

Self-respect and respect of others is an essential component of human interactions and values.

Self-Respect encompasses a person’s view about themselves, their abilities and their right to be treated with dignity and consideration. Having a healthy level of self- respect influences how you treat yourself and how you allow others to treat you.

As Sia found respect is earned not given and finding out how to achieve it is key.

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Today, we are exploring the keys you require to harness respect.

Embarking on a journey to harness respect requires introspection and honesty. Here are some guided questions to help you explore your relationship with respect.

As you find a quiet space and prepare to write in your journal, remember that these questions are designed to uncover your current standing and feelings about respect.

Let your answers flow without judgement to truly understand where you are today.

Self – Esteem

• How much do you appreciate yourself and like yourself?
• What are the words you use towards yourself on a daily basis?
• Are they words of encouragement or are the words you use ones of discouragement and putting yourself down.
• Take an inventory for a day of how you speak to yourself and pick one thing you can spend the next week changing to words of encouragement.
• Respecting how you speak to yourself allows you to speak to others with the same level of integrity.

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Boundaries

• Are you the eternal people pleaser, the one who always is known for never disagreeing with someone else?
• Never saying no?
• Changing your point of view to fit the current narrative of a conversation?

We live in a world of duality and are not put on this earth to be liked by all eight billion inhabitants (even if we could connect with all 8 billion).

There are times when respecting ourselves means that an icky situation may arise yet standing up for what you believe and honouring yourself means you may feel uncomfortable for a short while but when you reflect you will realise that you are more comfortable with yourself for standing within your own boundary than disrespecting yourself.

It's a guarantee that the person you had the uncomfortable conversation with, will have moved on rather quickly and forgotten it yet, where as you may have harboured resentment and “stewed on it “ for a lot longer.

Self-Care

This is a tangible way of acknowledging and respecting yourself. Being constantly at the beck and call of others and not giving yourself the same level of care creates burnout, arguments, anger and frustration. All qualities that lead to misunderstanding.

• Do you schedule time for you?
• Do you reward yourself with taking care of your physical health, managing stress, pursuing hobbies and interests?
• Do you schedule time for your own personal growth?

?Self-compassion

• Are you treating yourself with kindness and understanding especially in times of difficulty?
• Are you always gentle with yourself?
• When you make a mistake, do you then turn the mirror to what you can learn from what has happened?
• Do you seek to see what you're being required to understand from a different perspective?

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Personal Integrity

Are you being honest with yourself and others?

Living true to your beliefs and values allows you to take a stand for what you believe to be ethical and allows others to respect you for your choices.

You will never going to agree 100% of the time on everything but being able to communicate what you believe allows others to evaluate your words to fit their own personal integrity.

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Confidence and Assertiveness

Confidence refers to a belief in one's own abilities and worth, whilst assertiveness involves expressing one's views and needs clearly, honestly and respectfully.

Developing and displaying confidence and assertiveness can lead to more equitable and balanced interpersonal and professional relationships.

?Acceptance

Accept who you are, acknowledge your own strengths and weaknesses.

Embrace your uniqueness, your own brand of eccentricity and don’t compare yourself to others.

They too have their own brand of eccentricity and uniqueness.

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So why the Respect Pendulum ?

Respect will fluctuate both in ourselves and our respect for others. The Respect Pendulum is a way of showing ourselves how we can earn respect, how at times we are being disrespected and how we may be disrespecting others.

The pendulum constantly swings, it is never still, always moving in one direction or another, yet as it does, we are given the opportunity to gain a sense of self, a moment of balance a constant opportunities to self-correct.

Sia learned by following her own compass that she was able to acknowledge her own sense of accomplishment, yet at the same time receive the respect and admiration of the animals of the forest for her endeavours which lead to her feeling valued for her place in the animal kingdom.

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In Conclusion

Today's exercises are not about finding immediate solutions but understanding your current position regarding respect. Take some time out to discover how you can respect yourself, which way your interpersonal relationships are swinging, with clear communication, clarity and focus.

Take the opportunity to see how you can improve on this.

Recognise the factors influence the swings and strive to improve this.

With commitment and effort an environment of respect can be built even through the swings of the pendulum.

Until we meet again, always remember that you are Simply The Best!

#RespectBeyondLimitations #EarningRespectJourney #PendulumOfRespect