Respect the basics: 4.Choose to be KIND

?“People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel.” — Maya Angelou

Maya,s quote right there always reminds me why it’s crucial that in any given moment, at any place, and with anyone — that you are kind. That person you were rude to may be your next boss, who knows? It’s not worth the everlasting impression of you being unkind. Even to those who express negativity towards you. Because anyone who tries to bring you down, is beneath you already. Creating a habit of being kind is a difficult thing to do because there are so many internal and external factors working against us all the time. But everything begins with a little practice. You get what you give, so choose to be kind in an unkind world. Here are five reasons why you should be kind

1. Kind people are attractive.

A recent study, led by Yan Zhang of Huazhong University in China and published in the November 2014 issue of Personality and Individual Differences, found positive personality traits to increase perceptions of facial attractiveness.

The researchers tested 120 male and female adult Chinese participants, randomly divided into three groups, and asked each participant to rate 60 photos of unfamiliar Chinese women making neutral facial expressions. Two weeks later, participants rated the same pictures again. But this time, one group was given positive personality descriptions, like kindness and honesty, alongside the same photos. The second group looked at the same photos, but read accompanying negative personality descriptors (such as meanness or dishonesty). The control group was shown the same photos without any personality descriptors.

All three groups had similar attractiveness ratings in the first round of photo rankings. But in the second round when the descriptions were added, the group shown the same photos with positive personality descriptors assigned the highest attractiveness ratings to the photos, while the group with negative personality descriptors ranked the photos less attractive than the positive group and the control group.

Kindness brings people closer to you. And it makes them like you. Forget cologne or perfume, spray some kindness onto yourself.

 2. People will never forget how you made them feel.

Ever had an encounter with someone that was just awful? Either you were rude to them because you were just not feeling it that day or they were to you? You may only faintly remember what words were being exchanged, what actions sparked that awful encounter, but what you do remember fully well was that you felt irritated. Or mad. Or upset. You remembered how that person made you feel, as opposed to what he or she did.

That’s why it’s crucial that in any given moment, at any place, and with anyone that you are kind. That person you were rude to may be your next boss, who knows? It’s not worth the everlasting impression of you being unkind. Even to those who express negativity towards you. Because anyone who tries to bring you down, is beneath you already.

3. Happiness is a product of kindness.

Michael Norton, Professor at Harvard Business School , conducted a social experiment where he gave people an envelope with money. Some had $5 in it, and some had $20. There were two different directions being given. Some people were told to spend the money on themselves, while others were told to spend it on somebody else. Here are his findings:

1. People who spent money on other people got happier.

2. People who spent money on themselves had no effect on their mood.

3. The amount of money didn’t matter.

You think $20 would be better than $5, but what really mattered is that they spent it on somebody else rather than on themselves. Norton went on to conducting the same experiment in Canada, Uganda, Belgium, and more. And everywhere he looked, it became very apparent that giving money away makes you happier than keeping it for yourself.

It became very apparent that everywhere, kindness is a better and happier option.

4. Kindness is a cure.

The average person today has longings and our worries about their job, their family, their finances, the state of the economy etc. Being kind doesn’t always mean giving away something, or sacrificing tons. Being kind can be achieved through understanding and forgiveness, or the willingness to listen. No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. It heals the heart and soul regardless of the outward world around us.

Who can estimate the influence of a kind act? It may affect an entire life, or save a soul. Someone once truly said, “Blessed are we when we give joy even, for we do not know where it will end.” Who can tell how often the memory of a simple act of kindness will cheer and soften the heart for many years hence?

5. Using kind words makes you and others feel good.

Say please, thank you and sorry. Being polite makes you an appreciative and well-respected adult. It is important to keep quiet if nothing good can come from what is being said. Keep things positive and to hold back negative comments when words may hurt. The reality is, when you are kind to someone else even when you feel like the world is against you you'll probably feel better than if you acted cruel or rude towards them. I'm not saying you have to go out of your way to be the next mother Teresa or anything, but maybe just smile at the people you make awkward eye contact with instead of scowl, or hold the door for someone behind you instead of letting it slam in their face. Say thank you to someone you know has deserved it, ask someone if they are okay if they look a little down. The simplest things could change the outlook on a person's day.

While it is important to be kind to others, it’s as important if not a teensy bit more to be kind to yourself as well. I think we all know someone or we are that person who does so much for others, or wears themselves so thin with balancing everything in their life that they forget to be kind to themselves. Make sure you take time to appreciate the things you've done and what you are proud of. Be gentle with the words you say to yourself, don't think about the fact you haven't achieved your goals just yet, if its taking longer than you thought that’s okay. Do not give up on yourself. Encourage yourself and learn to say kind words to yourself so that it’s easy to say kind words to others

Pushing Boundaries…

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