Resolutions Don't Work: Try These Techniques Instead

Many people set resolutions at the beginning of each new year. We operate from the subconscious part of our brain 95% of the time and only 5% of the time from the conscious part of our brain where we set resolutions. Instead of setting resolutions, identify your limiting beliefs, set goals, explore and implement the Be-Do-Have Model, and create habits to achieve your goals.

The purpose of your brain is to keep you safe. When you work toward a resolution or try to achieve a new goal, limiting beliefs can activate your body’s fear response unnecessarily, causing what’s referred to as an “amygdala hijack” initiating the Fight/Flight/Freeze response. The stress hormone cortisol increases and the happy hormone/neurotransmitter serotonin decreases. Your survival is not at stake, but your body’s defenses act as if it is.

How To Spot a Limiting Belief?

Whenever you decline a challenge, take time to consider what belief is holding you back. Take an honest look at yourself. Your current results are a result of your beliefs, whether they are empowering beliefs or limiting beliefs. Your current bank account balance, your physical health, etc. are all a result of your subconscious brain programming.

By priming your brain with empowering beliefs, eventually your brain will see your new beliefs as safe. Then your Reticular Activating System (RAS) will get activated and be on the lookout for opportunities that will help you achieve that goal. Remember when you bought a new car? All of a sudden you see that same type of car everywhere on the road. The funny thing is....they were always there, but your subconscious wasn't focused on them then.

Below are three more techniques for achieving your goals:

Chunk Down Your Goals and Make them SMART

When you set a goal, your brain will act as if you've already accomplished it. It helps drive you. Planning and goal setting triggers dopamine in the brain, a reward chemical. Once you have the dopamine reward chemical associated with a particular activity you tend to want to continue doing similar things in order to feel good again. When you achieve a goal, serotonin, a neurotransmitter found in the brain gets released and contributes to well-being and happiness. It also plays a role in confidence and bolters self-esteem. To increase serotonin, challenge yourself regularly. Having an early success, for example, tailoring your resume or LinkedIn profile and seeing some results of your efforts can help release more dopamine and serotonin and increase the likelihood of you wanting to continue working toward your goals.

On the other hand, if you fail to achieve a goal, your brain react as if it’s lost a valued possession and can create anxiety, and fear. That’s why It’s important to set smaller goals to ultimately achieve a larger one. For each smaller goal we achieve we get gratification. Below are some tips for setting SMART goals:

• Specific:  Be sure you can define the goal. (Who, what, when, and why?) Example: I will develop my public speaking skills in an effort to help position me for a managerial role within my organization by completing my first Toastmasters’ manual by the end of this year.
• Measurable: Establish concrete criteria for measuring progress toward the attainment of each goal you set. Example: I will join a local Toastmasters club by January 31.
• Attainable: Do you have the time, money and drive to reach your goal? Example: A local group meets during my lunch hour at my company. Membership is paid by my employer. I am determined to move up in my company and developing my public speaking skills will help in those efforts.
• Relevant: Are you willing and able to work toward the goal? Example: Yes, my work/life schedule will allow me to allocate 3-4 hours a week toward this goal.
• Time Bound: Create a time frame for your goal. There needs to be a sense of urgency. Example: I will deliver my ice-breaker speech by 2/15. I will deliver one speech a month this year with the exception of July and August.

Simply the act of writing down your goals increases the chances of you achieving them. Combine that with specificity and you can soar. Get started on setting your SMART goals today!

The Be – Do – Have Model

This model is a powerful framework for lasting change. Once you are really clear about what you want and why you want it, then the focus is on 'who do I need to be' to achieve my goal, rather than 'what do I need to do'?

Be: If I am being a successful person, I will do what successful people do and I will get the results of what successful people have. My focus will be on my “being.” Success is an inside game. It doesn't start with what you do or have, but who you are being. If I’m not achieving what I want to achieve, I will ask myself:

• Whom am I being? How am I showing up in the world? Start with increasing your awareness through a self-assessment.
• Next, ask yourself: Who has want I want? Whom do I need to become to obtain what I want to have? What qualities does this successful person have? What thoughts, values, beliefs, and mindset do they possess? What are their behaviors, actions, habits, and decisions?

Do: Begin to model yourself after the person that has what you want. What new habits, disciplines or behaviors do I need to start? What current habits, disciplines or behaviors do I need to expand? In other words, what do I need to stop, start, do more of or less of if I were already this identity?

You will do what you need to do because you are being a successful person.

Have: The results of your behaviors, actions, habits, decisions, etc. will lead to what you want to have, i.e., achieve your goal. 

Habit Techniques

Two habit-forming techniques that I share with my coaching clients and students include:

• Implementation Intention: You make a plan for when something is going to happen.

I will [BEHAVIOR] at [TIME] in [LOCATION].

Let's say you have a goal of losing 30 pounds. To create a habit, first create one micro-goal: I will go to the YMCA three days a week after work. Your new habit using the implementation intention technique could be:

I will work out at 5:15 p.m. on M/W/F at the YMCA.

Once you are consistent for some length of time with the above, you could add another implementation intention to work toward losing the 30 pounds, such as:

I will make a healthy lunch for work at 9 p.m. each worknight in my kitchen.

• Habit Stacking: This is another technique where you stack a current habit with a habit you want to develop. Here’s the formula:

After [CURRENT HABIT], I will [NEW HABIT]

For example, let’s say you want to start meditating every morning. You could use habit stacking to pair a habit you already perform with a habit you want to create:

After I pour my cup of coffee each morning, I will meditate for five minutes.

Consistency is more important than intensity. Even trying something for two minutes every day is more effective to get a habit to stick than doing something for 30 minutes once a week. Repetition is key. What habits do you want to diminish and what habits do you want to create?

I would love to hear from you! What resonated for you with the above tips?

Joan Runnheim Olson is passionate about learning and understanding how the brain works and uses that knowledge to empower and inspire her clients and students to transform from stuck to unstoppable and live their best life ever. Subscribe to hear from us about new blog posts, specials, and events. Joan also offers a course titled, "Introduction to Brain-Based Coaching: Leveraging Neuroscience for Greater Impact with Your Coaching Clients." This course is designed for coaches who want to understand how the brain works to facilitate positive change with their clients and themselves through improved thinking.