Resistance to Change Is a Survival Tactic

Change is emotional. Listen to uncover the real roots of resistance.

Nerves aflutter, I took my position at the front of a large conference room and faced 50 stony glares from my client’s communications team. Before screening the expensive corporate video my agency produced for their company, I told them the backstory and excitedly urged them to embrace its message and promote it to the world. I knew before I even pressed Play that there was a zero percent chance of that happening. 

The communications team was already reeling from a number of organizational changes that they neither understood nor agreed with. Their newly-promoted leader, Jim, isolated himself and didn’t ask for guidance. His messaging strategy got underway without the team’s participation. Jim’s team greeted this deep violation of group norms with folded arms, which stayed folded until Jim left the company. 

The team resisted change, and they won.

Change management practices are filled with strategies to “overcome” resistance through increased communication, reassurance about training opportunities, and an inspiring future vision. And while all of those are important, they skip over the underlying cause of resistance. 

Change is emotional

People who resist change are typically worried that they will experience one or more of these losses: 

• Feelings of competence or mastery of a skill
• Sense of autonomy or control, where their actions result in clear changes
• Connection to other people and a feeling of belonging

Competence, autonomy, and connection happen to be the 3 pillars of self-determination theory, and they are required for us to maintain our well-being. Mess with them, and people will resist in a variety of overt and subtle ways.

Some resistance to change is warranted, natural, and an extension of loss. A favorite manager leaves and is replaced by someone the team doesn’t know or trust yet. Revenues fall sharply and a product team must scramble in a new direction. Change is normal, and the loss that people experience as a result of change is also normal. The staff might grumble, but if leaders handle that shift well and can link the change to an overall purpose, the discomfort will be short-term. Form, storm, norm, perform, as they say. It’s the surprises that keep people stuck in the Storm phase, resisting even the best ideas.

Intellectual arguments vs. feelings

We can’t always access our deeper feelings in a safe way at work, so we use intellectual arguments to combat emotional topics. Employees appeal to leaders with smart-sounding objective reasons that the change won’t fly:

• “This new product direction will harm our ability to recruit talent” 
• “This re-org will cause a slow-down in our revenues”
• “Jim doesn’t have the experience to run that division yet. Maybe next year.”
• “Jim’s messaging plan doesn’t adhere to the approved strategic direction.”  

They might be right, and those arguments should definitely be considered. But if the arguments seem puzzling, there could be more going on. Behind the scenes, employees calculate the personal costs of a proposed change. If Jim starts running that division, I'll lose my peer relationship with him (autonomy), our team will get shuffled around (connection), and my job responsibilities could shift (competence). 

Because people assume that only cold, hard facts will sway leaders, they present arguments backed by mountains of data. Leaders, seeking to increase participation and enthusiasm, might respond by holding a workshop to discuss the arguments. But that engages teams on the intellectual level, side-steps the emotions below, and adds power dynamics to the conversation which silences individuals who might have a different perspective.

Once that strategy fails, employees begin demonstrating their objections through behaviors, which could be one or more of: 

• Arguing with co-workers and managers about the change, nitpicking, refusing to adopt the change, or sabotaging plans.
• Working non-stop to prove a point, or putting blinders on & diving into an unrelated project.
• Clamming up, not participating in discussions, or not showing up to meetings. 
• Being overly complimentary/enthusiastic with leaders, saying yes without considering options, then saying the opposite to peers.

We are all battling ghosts

Many people who resist change are protecting something precious at the core of their identities. The objection to Jim's promotion might not be about that at all. It might be bigger and older, especially if the reaction seems outsized in comparison to the stimulus.

If you are familiar with the 4F trauma personality types, you’ll recognize employee behaviors as survival responses to cope with stressful events. 

When we’re young we react to threats to get our bodies out of danger and to find safety. We may fight, lashing out at our oppressor or hammering on our siblings. We practice flight by being a model student or trying to disappear. We might freeze, shutting down or dissociating. Or we’ll survive by being a fawn, saying and doing whatever it takes to avoid disappointment and punishment. 

These responses are the work of the amygdala, our lizard brain, whose function is to keep us safe. They are instantaneous, happening before conscious thought kicks in.

Fear responses become entrenched 

Because these responses work, they stick around, embodying themselves as personality traits as we grow into adulthood. Remember, these tactics helped us survive our childhoods: they were once our best available tools. But lizard brain habits are hard to break. Even if these behaviors no longer serve us, we continue to reflexively use them when confronted with any negative surprise, from a fire to interpersonal conflict. 

• Arguing with co-workers, managers > Fight
• Working non-stop to prove a point > Flight
• Clamming up, not participating > Freeze
• Being overly complimentary/enthusiastic > Fawn

To further complicate matters, threat responses can trigger each other. One person’s Fight response to a proposed change could provoke another person’s Freeze response, causing them to shut down. (An echo of “dad is in a rage so I will hide under my bed.”) So now you’re at work dealing with a toxic cycle of unhelpful responses and a barely-remembered rationale for the original change. 

New division leader Jim finds himself in the center of a storm, where his former peers have turned against him, the agency can’t move forward, and he doesn’t know whom to trust. 

The “No Surprises” approach to change

Change resistance isn’t satisfying for anyone. The constant stress response fries adrenaline and cortisol hormones, causing mental and physical exhaustion. Employees' fear about the possible loss of competence, autonomy, and connection is also time-consuming, interfering with daily job responsibilities. But leaders have some options.

Try to see resistance to change as a strength that can be redirected with empathy and planning. If employees are enacting all these behaviors to resist a change, it means they care. They want to feel safe and feel a sense of purpose. You can access their constructive energy by reducing fear and reestablishing safety. 

Allowing for transition time between change states is critical, as people need milestones and rituals to mark the shift. Adopt a “no surprises” approach to your change and keep the pillars of self-determination theory in mind.

Boost feelings of competence

• Engineer small wins that align to the new direction
• Formally honor and recognize what the team has accomplished in the past
• Provide feedback about why their current skills are critical to the success of the change

Preserve autonomy

• Bring in teams early and encourage them to author a change with you
• Let people make choices about their new work 
• Detail responsibilities so they know what’s expected of them
• Ensure that each person knows the critical role they play in the success of the change

Foster connection

• Create opportunities for new teams to work together on small projects in advance of a change to enhance group cohesion
• Encourage managers to create social moments for new teams
• Make time for new leaders to connect with their teams in order to develop trusting relationships

Go easy on extrinsic rewards

Extrinsic motivation techniques like bonuses, gift cards, and trophies are nice, but they are transparently manipulative. People who are already resisting a change might double-down on their resistance if the encouragement feels empty or transactional. It could also switch their motivation to work from purpose and intrinsic motivation to external reward. Proceed with caution.

When surprise is unavoidable

Leaders and managers might have to address a change after the fact, especially when openly planning for it could disrupt revenues or markets. The Covid pandemic is a sobering example of an external force that requires companies to turn on a dime regarding working policies, adjustments to revenue loss, and product pivots. These quick changes rob us of the adjustment period that we so badly need. 

A series of conversations will be required to repair the loss of trust. Here’s a proposed template for a conversation with an employee right after a sudden change:

• Here’s what happened and why
• Here’s how I feel about it [modeling the sharing of feelings is essential]
• How do you feel about it?
• Here’s why your feelings are valid
• What are your biggest concerns, and what are the opportunities?
• Let’s talk about how to fix the problems you identified
• What role do you want to play?
• Give me input but I will make the final call
• I will follow up with you on this date

Listen for deeper objections to change

Change doesn’t need to be a battle. Jim didn’t have to leave the company, the team didn’t have to spend so much time and energy resisting everything he tried, and they didn’t have to waste a ton of money on that video (it was a really good video!). 

By keeping the pillars of self-determination theory in mind as you design for a change, you can be more responsive to employee fears that they will lose their competence, autonomy, and connection to others. Pay attention to intellectual arguments that might be masking those concerns and ask questions until you get to underlying emotions. Resistance is a symptom. With patience and compassion, you can direct the light of inquiry to its cause.