The resilience of resilience.

As I reflect on my past, I am amazed at the myriad situations and circumstances I have faced. They have left an indelible mark on my life, shaping the variables that make up my identity. It's remarkable that as challenging as these experiences have been, they haven't weakened me; on the contrary, they helped me to gain experience. They led me to think of the people who crossed my path, the many I have treated, counselled, and mentored. Many of them faced circumstances like mine, suffering from problems that echoed mine.

I often meet rigid, resilient, and hardened individuals who are or have become inflexible in the face of life's adversities. In my experience, this attitude rarely leads to healthy outcomes.

In nature, when a material is subjected to a force that wears down its structure, we say that it is experiencing stress. This is a term that is also used in psychology. The stress of a material is the point at which it is subjected to a stress that exceeds its strength properties. Currently, its properties suffer from molecular fatigue, where the molecules lose the energy that holds them together, resulting in a reduction in their durability.

When a material is subjected to stress, there is no turning back, except in some exceptional cases where rework is possible. However, this does not occur naturally, in special situations rework is necessary and often the only solution to restore integrity.

The harder and stiffer a material is, the less likely it is to compromise its characteristics when it comes to stress. I'm making an analogy, a transport of concepts, a metaphor between the mechanics of materials and our life. The psychology of human attitudes is for me something that is first in nature and then borrowed from us.

My theme is resilience, a psychological trait that fascinates me and I think in part it's a little bit of me and people I know. Resilience is to resistance and water is to fire. Some believe that resisting or being resilient is a formidable property, but I disagree. I don't even believe that resistance is a property of resilience.

Some characteristics, for example, of resistance properties seem to be resilience.

Toughness is the ability of a material to absorb energy before fracturing. But fracture.

Ductility is the ability of a material to deform plastically before breakage. But it breaks.

Fatigue strength is the ability of a material to resist failure under cyclic or repeated loads. But it's tiring.

Tensile strength is the ability of a material to resist tensile force before it breaks. But it breaks.

They all converge to stress.

However, resilience is not governed by the same laws, although it also has the same characteristics as resistance as tools of its existence, but it is itself a separate concept.

I compare resilience to quantum tunnelling (or the Tunnel Effect), a phenomenon in quantum mechanics in which particles can transpose a classically forbidden energy state, i.e., in classical physics, there would be resistance. Resilience doesn't absorb impact, but impact passes through it. Don't forget that we're working with the metaphor. Resilient people suffer contrary actions, with stressful characteristics, often designed to destroy, however, this force is absorbed by this permeability.

A hard and strong material is useful until it stresses, it is a traumatic process and there is no turning back, it will lose its resistance characteristics, whereas a resilient material will not oppose impacts, as it is permeable.

Have you ever noticed that there are people who don't fall? Have you ever heard that the higher the height, the greater the impact of the fall? This expression is used for people who hold high positions; Well, for resilient people, this phrase doesn't make sense. The same force that propels them down will be the one with which they return to their state of equilibrium.

When I was a child, I used to play with an inflatable doll that had a base full of sand, the "silly John" (punching clown), you could hit him at will, he never fell, and he always came back to the same position. The secret was that it had a very heavy base sitting on the ground, and everything else on the body was made of plastic, like an air balloon.

The center of gravity was not on the puppet's body, but rather on the sand base. In the same way, the resilient have their bases and foundations in their centre of gravity, and not in the construction visible to others. At first, the impact seems to knock "punching clown" down, but it is an illusion, that he will be back on his feet because of the weight of his foundations. If your centre of balance is not at the base, the fall is for sure.

In resistance, there is a loss of material, while resilience gains or preserves. The resisters stop to endure diversity—the resilient move forward in construction.

Difficulties are, in the eyes of the resilient, material for transformation and benefit, while the resistant lose material and waste time in constant repairs and rework.

The resisters get tired and stressed they just think about stopping. Retire and they will live peacefully. The resilient don't know the meaning of the word stop, why stop? Stopping doesn't make sense when you go through life immersed in challenges. Continuity is something they always strive for; in whatever form it takes. They are natural mentors, as they are always connected to the products of their development. They view retirement as a necessary evil. But it's not part of them.

While the resistant ones don't leave a legacy, because once they lose any of their durability characteristics, they are replaced and feel disposable, resilient ones generate repeatable models, because their model is great, sought-after, studied, and generates performance and savings. When something prevents them from continuing in some way, they go through a metamorphosis, for the resilient nothing is lost, everything is transformed, and they begin to form and shape the next generation using the guidance of their model. The resisters are full of themselves. And the resilient are in the middle of it all.

The resisters hide their weaknesses. The resilient use them as a trophy for their victories.

For some time in my working life, I worked in recruitment.

Guess who I was looking for?

Paul.

#psychology #mentorship #recruitment #leadership #reliability #humanfactor #mentoring

Robert Smith - Dan Goldin - Bettyna Beni - Will S.