"The Resilience Blueprint: Trauma-Informed Strategies for Growth"

The holiday season is often seen as a time of joy and celebration, but for many, it can also bring unexpected stress and sadness. The pressures of the season frequently create emotional challenges, leaving some feeling overwhelmed rather than uplifted.

Over the next four weeks, I’ll share practical, trauma-informed preventive strategies to guide you through this precious holiday season. These tools are designed to help you maintain emotional well-being, so you can emerge from this time not just intact, but renewed.

#1: Treat Everyone As If They Are Unaware – Allow Room for Error

Here’s an intriguing revelation: only 36% of people are aware of their emotions as they experience them. That leaves 64% who are either oblivious to their emotional state in real time or fail to connect their feelings to how they are interacting with others.

What That Means to Them

For the 64% who lack real-time emotional awareness, this can result in reactive or unconscious behavior. They may respond defensively, misinterpret your intentions, or fail to acknowledge the emotional undercurrents of a conversation. For instance, family members harboring unresolved negative feelings from the past might quickly turn hostile during holiday gatherings, leaving you bewildered by their outburst. Similarly, workplace colleagues may suddenly act distant due to external stressors, such as recent political tensions. Their visceral reactions often come without any conscious realization of the emotional shift on their part.

What That Means to You

When interacting with those in the 64%, you may face unpredictable responses or behaviors that seem disproportionate to the situation. This can complicate communication, deepen conflicts, and hinder collaboration. Understanding this dynamic creates an opportunity for patience and empathy. By recognizing that their reactions may stem from unprocessed emotions, you can approach these interactions with greater self-awareness and emotional control.

The Art of "Decoupling"

It’s essential to master the art of "decoupling" emotionally when faced with high-intensity conflict. Decoupling from your emotions means intentionally creating a mental distance from your feelings. This allows you to observe and analyze them objectively without letting their intensity dictate your actions or reactions. This rational approach not only protects your own emotional stability but also helps to de-escalate tense situations.

How Does That Impact Your Classroom?

In the classroom, the lack of emotional awareness—among students or teachers—can disrupt the learning environment. Students in the 64% may struggle to regulate their emotions, resulting in disruptive behaviors, disengagement, or conflicts with peers. For example, stressors from home may spill into the classroom, triggering trauma-influenced behaviors where minor misunderstandings can escalate quickly.

Teachers who lack emotional awareness themselves might unintentionally respond in ways that exacerbate the situation instead of calming it. Developing empathy and resilience becomes critical in managing such challenges effectively. By fostering an environment of understanding and emotional stability, teachers can better support students through these moments, creating a positive and productive learning experience for all.

How Do You Know Which Category You Fit Into?

Self-reflection and assessment are critical to determining your level of emotional awareness. Ask yourself:

• Can I identify what I’m feeling at the moment it arises?
• Do my emotions sometimes surprise me in hindsight?
• Am I able to connect my feelings to my behavior in real time? If you find it challenging to answer these questions, you may fall into the 64% category. However, the good news is that emotional awareness is a skill that can be developed through intentional practice and self-reflection.

Take the Survey:

Here’s a quick self-assessment to gauge your emotional awareness:

1. I can name my emotions as I experience them. (Always, Often, Sometimes, Rarely, Never)
2. I notice when my feelings influence how I treat others. (Always, Often, Sometimes, Rarely, Never)
3. I can explain why I feel a certain way in the moment. (Always, Often, Sometimes, Rarely, Never)
4. I reflect on my emotions after difficult interactions. (Always, Often, Sometimes, Rarely, Never)
5. I actively try to manage my emotions to improve my relationships. (Always, Often, Sometimes, Rarely, Never)

• A) Always (5 points)
• (B) Often (4 points)
• (C) Sometimes (3 points)
• (D) Rarely (2 points)
• (E) Never (1 point)

Scoring Metric:

Add up the points for all five questions to determine your level of emotional awareness.

• 21-25 Points: High Emotional Awareness
• 16-20 Points: Moderate Emotional Awareness
• 11-15 Points: Developing Emotional Awareness
• 6-10 Points: Low Emotional Awareness
• Below 6 Points: Minimal Emotional Awareness

More information about Wes Hall and his "Trauma-informed Preventive Practices" can be found here: Know your trauma