Remember, you're powerful.

This is a bit of trick question because we all are already powerful, but sometimes we forget. So if you're in a forgetful phase, this question allows you to imagine what it would be like or what you could create without triggering a saboteur story that you're not powerful enough to do it.?

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To be clear about what power is, let's start with what it isn't. It isn't dominance or control. If you think of a surfing analogy, you don't control the ocean, you flow with the force of it to propel you forward. That's how it is with personal power too. You be with it, let it buoy and support you. It can be harnessed into courage, trust, and confidence.

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My favorite example of remembering my power from a forgetful stage was when a former boss once told me "I was too nice" during a performance review. ?I was gutted. This was the worst insult I'd ever received at work. I interpreted it to mean I was weak and ineffective, which was untrue. I sputtered in response and left the meeting to spiral for the rest of the day, questioning my very existence. This is an example of giving someone else my power. She didn't take it, I gave it, by letting her define me with one phrase that didn't have meaning. I didn't ask any questions like what did she mean by this? I didn't acknowledge that she was having an off day and wasn't prepared for my review. I'm not making myself wrong here, just noticing where I was and remembering when we know better, we do better.?

Fast forward to the next conversation I had with her, when I remembered that I was powerful. I asked that we discuss her feedback from my review and shared that I could understand she was unfamiliar with my approach. I reframed it as a superpower that allowed to me to build rapport, gain trust, and discuss hard topics without contention. I asked if there was anything in my results or work product that was problematic? She said no. I asked if there was anything specific she wanted me to work on? She said no. She owned that she was not having a great day when we last spoke and couldn't remember why she used that phrase. She also said to me, “wow, you're really powerful right now”. Please note, I was not yelling or saying anything rude. In fact, I was holding kindness in my heart. And while I prefer the word kind, I suppose you could say, I was being nice. ???

If you don't know how to access your power, would you be willing to play to find out?