Release the WHY and focus on the WHAT and the HOW!

The best way to get yourself well and truly stuck in your growth cycle, whether it be in horse training or any other subject, is to delve too deeply into the "why" of Life.

Why is the horse behaving like this??is kind of like asking?Why was I brought into existence?

You’re rarely gonna find the real answer.

It’s not always possible to know why. Sometimes the information isn’t available to us, sometimes things just happen, other times the answer might be obvious to a professional but not obvious to the person asking the question.

I find that I can’t use the word why for hardly anything productive. It’s a useless question unless your goal is not to be productive, but instead to philosophize and analyze everything to death…if that’s you, you know I’m gonna tease you.

"What", on the other hand, is a word that brings clarity to me right away.

Instead of asking "why" the horse is behaving a certain way and inventing all kinds of plausible or implausible stories about how he’s been abused or doesn’t like people with blue pants, etc., etc., I ask "what".

• What would I like him to behave like instead?
• What would I like him to feel like when I ride?
• What is physically up with him (if anything), i.e., is he currently lame, does the saddle fit well, have his teeth been done recently, does he have ulcers, has he had body work recently…

If I know the horse is up-to-date on my check list: (1) teeth; (2) has a well-fitting saddle; (3) isn’t physically lame; (4) is being treated for ulcers, if there is any suspicion; and (5) has had some recent body work and didn’t present with anything serious…then, I just decide that it’s a training issue and all the horse is demonstrating is good old natural resistance and a lack of work ethic. I might change my opinion later on, but only if I’m presented with new data I didn’t have before.

In the meantime, I skip the whole problem and go straight to the solution asking myself what will will it take (training wise) to make him happy, relaxed and balanced again?

I don’t need to know the exact why. I don’t need to know the exact story of the horse. I can read his body and see what he needs.

For me, the reason behind any riding or training issue in horses is usually a lack of balance or a lack of clarity. Both spring from bad previous training.?Fix the training and you’ll fix the horse.

Just like with people, a lack of clarity on how to perform a task will eventually create frustration and animosity because no one enjoys doing anything they don’t understand or perform poorly. It’s no fun. Horses feel the same way.

When it comes to balance, lack of physical balance is obviously a huge problem. When a horse is mounted, their center of gravity is completely changed by the rider's weight. The horse has no idea how to fix this and if the rider is unbalanced or uses their aids in a way that unsettles the horse, then it’s easy to understand why the horse is so uncooperative. He literally might feel like he can’t balance properly when the rider is sitting on him.

Imagine how uncomfortable it would be for you if someone was sitting on your shoulders, swaying or bumping out of rhythm with your movements, and at the same time pulling on your hair or your face and kicking you in the ribs. Would you like that?

I don’t think so.

Even if we know the why, it doesn’t really help us solve the problem which consists of the what and the how. What you should do and how you should do it are the only questions that will solve the problems you are facing.

• What will help the horse regain clarity?
• What will help the horse regain balance?
• What can I do to be a better leader to my horse so that he trusts and respects me?
• What can I do to ride better and use my aids better?
• What tools or equipment will help me fine tune my aids?
• What can I do differently that will give me a better result?
• What or who can I contact to help me with this?
• What will be my process and how will I go about making that a reality?
• What does the horse need physically and mentally to make that happen?
• What exercises can I practice to resolve this?

When riders get stuck on the WHY, they usually stay there and don’t progress as it is a mindset that?focuses awareness around the problem but not awareness around the solution.

Let me give you an example of why the "why" doesn’t really matter in horse training. Let’s say we have two completely different horses with completely different life experiences in the past:

1. One of these horses has been neglected, abused, treated and fed poorly or not enough. He is a good minded horse though, so he’s overbearing with people and doesn’t throw much of a fit, despite all that’s gone down in his past. He just avoids people, doesn’t like them much and runs away when you try to catch him.
2. The other horse is well taken care of, fed top quality feed, ridden 2-3 times a week, gets all the attention he wants and is allowed to get away with murder. He’s spoiled rotten, loved on since he was a foal and people make excuses all the time for his naughty entitled behavior. He will randomly bite you as you walk past his stall, will kick at you when you when you enter his stall and is just generally a hot headed rude dude.

Despite their VERY different experiences in the past and very different behavior patterns, both horses need the exact same training foundation.

They both need to learn 3 elements:

1. Trust
2. Respect; and
3. How to respond to the aids correctly.

The only thing that really differs in their education is how much of each element they need. The first one needs more focus on trust because of the abuse he’s experienced; the second one needs more focus on respect as he’s used to dominating people, and they probably both need to learn the aids as this is the most neglected subject.

In order to succeed in training both horses, I don’t need to know the past case of either one and I don’t need to read their thoughts.

Their behavior and body language gives it ALL away. Not in terms of why they are behaving the way they are, but what they need to learn in order to behave differently and create a new positive future.

Does it make sense?

That’s why asking "why why why" is a human thing where we are stuck in the past, not a horse thing.?Body language is all you need to read in order to understand a horse.

It’s like if your car was in an accident. The mechanic doesn’t need to know exactly what happened in the accident, he just looks at the car in order to see what parts are broken, and then he fixes them, never knowing the why.

It’s never about the why.

When we look for the why in horse behavior it’s easy to write stories in our minds to try and make sense of it all. These stories are often disheartening. We feel bad for the horse and then every time something goes wrong we blame ourselves and end up making it about us. A difficult horse becomes our personal failure every time something goes wrong.

Horses and animals put you face to face with your own weaknesses on a daily basis. It’s hard to face this brutal truth every day. But they also make you better in every way, if you’re willing to learn and avoid making it about you.

The horse doesn’t care about his past. His new life starts today, every day.

The best way to help a horse is to switch into a neutral mindset so you can observe the problem from the outside without taking things personally. This allows you to grow and learn the right skills needed for each horse.

A good rule to remember is:?Leave your emotions out of the equation…this goes for anything in life you want to improve at.

…skip the problem and go directly to the solution and collect $200 :-)

Create a new positive future for you and your horse today.

If your mind likes to live in the past and get stuck on the why, or live in the future and get stuck on expectations, I guarantee neither will work for your horse.

Your homework? Life is now. Go do something new today. Renew yourself, your thoughts and your actions.

And ask yourself:?What?can I do differently to get a different or better result today with my horse?

Forget about the why! :-)

Celie xo

For more articles and information on Celie Weston and Artful Riding Academy, visit their website by clicking here.