Relationships as a Catalyst for Success
One of the most influential studies on relationships and success is the Harvard Study of Adult Development, which spanned over 80 years and tracked multiple generations. Findings from this study revealed that close relationships were more important predictors of long-term happiness and life satisfaction than wealth, social class, or IQ. Dr. Robert Waldinger, director of the study, shared, “Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period” (Waldinger, 2015). Strong relationships offer not only emotional support but also practical benefits, such as career opportunities, mentorship, and constructive feedback.
Positive relationships are associated with several advantages:
The neurobiology of human interactions also supports the benefits of positive relationships. Neuroscience shows that dopamine, a neurotransmitter linked to reward and motivation, is released during positive social interactions. Oxytocin, often referred to as the “bonding hormone,” is also associated with social connectedness and contributes to trust and cooperation (Zak, 2012). These neurochemical reactions underscore that relationships are not only essential for well-being but also fuel motivation and focus, directly contributing to success.
Bullies, Passive Attributes, and Leadership Outcomes
The manner in which individuals navigate relationships, particularly in the workplace, can significantly affect their own success and the culture of their organization. Leadership behaviors generally fall along a spectrum from aggressive or authoritarian (bullying) to passive or even people-pleasing.
The Cost of Bullying in Leadership
Research on bullying and aggressive behavior suggests that these tactics may yield short-term gains but ultimately hinder long-term success. Bullying in the workplace manifests as aggressive communication, misuse of power, or undermining others to gain personal advantage. Studies by the Workplace Bullying Institute reveal that bullying negatively impacts productivity, morale, and employee turnover, creating a toxic culture that impedes overall organizational success (Namie & Namie, 2011).
Furthermore, according to psychologist and professor Christine Porath, workplaces where incivility and bullying are present show a 66% decline in performance and 78% drop in commitment among employees (Porath & Pearson, 2013). Bullying behaviors may be perceived as dominant or powerful in the short term, but they typically result in isolation for the individual engaging in them, as well as resentment from others. Aggressive behaviors also increase cortisol levels in observers, leading to heightened stress and a decrease in team cohesion (Zapf et al., 2011).
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Passive or Collaborative Leadership
On the other side of the spectrum are leaders who adopt a more passive approach, which can be a double-edged sword. Passivity, particularly when it involves people-pleasing, may prevent a leader from making difficult but necessary decisions. However, collaboration and openness—a hallmark of healthy passive or supportive styles—tend to foster psychological safety, a vital element for team success (Edmondson, 1999). Amy Edmondson, a scholar in psychological safety, found that leaders who create environments where employees feel safe to voice ideas without fear of retribution experience greater innovation and productivity.
This collaborative approach aligns with servant leadership, a style in which leaders prioritize the well-being of their teams. Research has shown that servant leaders can inspire greater loyalty and productivity, creating a ripple effect that contributes to organizational success (van Dierendonck, 2011). However, excessively passive traits can be detrimental when they prevent timely decision-making, so balance is key.
The Best Approach: Adaptive Leadership
A growing field in leadership theory suggests that the most successful leaders are those who adapt to situations rather than adhering strictly to an aggressive or passive style. Adaptive leadership, introduced by Ronald Heifetz, involves adjusting one's approach to meet the demands of the context, blending assertiveness with empathy and assertiveness when needed (Heifetz, 1994). These leaders build trust within their teams while setting clear expectations and holding people accountable. This balanced approach allows for personal growth, team productivity, and a healthier organizational culture.
Conclusion: Building Meaningful Relationships for Success
Ultimately, relationships are fundamental to individual and organizational success. Social connections provide emotional and practical support, while leadership styles influence both the individual’s success and the organization’s culture. Research suggests that while aggressive, bullying tactics may yield some short-term benefits, they generally detract from long-term success due to the harm they cause to workplace morale and psychological safety. Alternatively, leaders who foster positive relationships, practice adaptive leadership, and value psychological safety often cultivate a culture that supports success, collaboration, and innovation.
The way we interact with others and the relationships we build serve as more than just support systems—they are foundational to how we navigate our personal and professional lives. Individual success, therefore, is not just about solitary ambition but about finding ways to grow alongside others. Embracing this perspective can create a more connected, resilient, and successful life path.
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International Speaker on Workplace Wellness | CEO of Motion Infusion | Bestselling Author | Workplace Wellness and Wellbeing Expert
2 周Well said, Patty de Vries. Thanks for the reminder. Hugs.