Rejection is Temporary, but The Future is Infinite!

"Dear Rahab, Thank you for your interest in the role of xxx with company ABC. At this time we have chosen to move forward with another candidate."

"Hello Rahab, We are happy to see that you applied for xxxx with us at xxxx. Unfortunately, we decided to proceed with other candidates and will not take your application further."

The freaking sound the same!

I sat at Starbucks staring at this e-mail, that e-mail, another one, and another one, 30 emails all sound familiar. The hot chocolate became bitter, the nice cozy sofa felt harder :( ...each slew of the sentence was meant to sound respectful but they all echoed so loud!

You’re rejected! You’re not good enough! Your experience is a waste of time!Oh Lord, what have I done wrong?

Every one of us experiences rejection—the no’s in life we fear to hear and find difficult to accept. I’ve worked hard for that, I thought I actually nailed it, this was meant to be my win, we mutter even sometimes out loud. But regardless how much we toil and pour out emotional investments over the things we pursue, we must remember that there are situations in life just out of our control. What made us deserving of those rejections, we really don’t know. But we should focus on how we should deal with them.

It’s so hard to move on from past rejections knowing the future only holds more. Because rejection feels like hitting a concrete wall, and concrete walls hurt. To slam your body into a concrete wall over and over, to keep bruising the same bruises over and over, to continually end up hurt over and over really hurts. So where do we draw the line? How do we cover these scars? I tell myself that these experiences of rejection are an important stimulant for maturity because it allows us to meet turning points that lead to better opportunities.

As a Keynote Speaker, Writer & Motivational speaker, I experience rejection every now and then, Here are few reasons am always very grateful when I receive the No Emails, the brutal No from VIPs, When clients reject the finished product etc:

1. Makes you stronger.

After 400 “no thank you” queries, or 700 job applications with no sign of life you learn that the important things in life do not depend on landing that job you are underqualified for or getting your book published by a major publishing firm or landing that sponsorship for career growth. You have your family, your friends, opportunity, and drive. Anyone who learns how to be resilient in these types of situations can “win” when other hard things may come their way. Resiliency is a trait that cannot be bought, learned or taught. It is something you have to grow from within and perfect through rejection, growth, and opportunity.

2. There will always be something better.

Whether it is a better relationship, a better business opportunity, or a better coffee order when your sommelier tells you they are out of your favorite, go-to Starbucks or Espresso House. You are forced into opportunity when you are rejected on your initial idea. That dress that wasn’t your size will lead you to a more beautiful, flattering and stunning find. That heel that was uncomfortable will lead you to find a better comfortable heel to boost your confidence as you stride to your next million dollar meeting.

3. You learn.

Whether you get rejected during an interview, a book pitch to a literary agent or that relationship that made you feel complete". These situations allow you see what you may have done wrong, or could improve on. Maybe you become too emotional when asked personal questions during an interview that led to not getting that job or partnership. It’s rejection that helps us see opportunities that we can improve on.

4. Pushes you to see comfort in the non-comfort.

Maybe you had always thought you would be a pilot, but you just could not pass. This is when you re-evaluate and think outside the box, what could you still be good at in that or related to that field that you would enjoy doing and can excel at? This may lead you to air host etc. Maybe, like me, you wanted to be News Anchor, but couldn't land in the TV business world, and through my re-evaluation, I knew I was a skilled writer, that I motivate the masses, etc. It is the rejection that helps us re-evaluate and think outside the box and see our perfectly planned life plan in.

5. Molds who you are.

When you finally achieve your “life goals” and have made it to where you want to be in life (because you have read this far I deeply know you will since you are resilient and will not let rejection hold you back from at least trying) others are going to look up to you and ask you how you got to where you are. You can tell them your story of trivial effort, rejection, and resilience. You are valuing people over profit when you see others that just need that chance that you were looking for when you first started.

Truth be told if we all got what we want we would be a society of spoilt adults :). Whether professional or personal, learning to embrace the rejections will only build your strength and capability to be fully ready and appreciative of when that ‘yes’ comes along. Remember, God’s plan will always be better than ours and sometimes that’s all the faith we need to get over the fear of rejection Shed your tears, but then find your inner rebel and boldly declare that you will keep going.

Dear readers, Can you resonate with me? What has rejection taught you? Share in the comment below.