Reflections on Option B

I just finished Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant’s Option B. Ever since it came out, I have wanted to read this, partly inspired by my own experiences with loss. I thought reading this book that it would be all about things that would resonate primarily in my personal life (and that is a much longer list). I was surprised how many parts could be applied to my professional life. I want to share a few takeaways:

• Write down your dreams. Write down the goals that will allow you to achieve those dreams. Boom, you have a roadmap. 
• List your contributions alongside your gratitudes. Both will make you feel better. 
• You don’t have to aim for perfection. As a few of the people who I have supervised over the years have heard me say “‘Good Enough’ is sometimes the goal.”
• Self-compassion comes from recognition that our imperfections are part of being human. Are you as compassionate for yourself as you are for your friends and coworkers? 
• Resilience can be thought of as a mathematical formula R=s+s/a (strength and speed in response to adversity). By building up the muscles of strength and speed in reaction, we can increase our capacity for adversity. 
• Some people avoid challenging topics. Some people are “openers” who ask questions that get you talking and listen without judgement. How can we be an opener for difficult conversations with our reports, colleagues, and supervisors? 
• The simple act of labeling negative emotions makes them easier to deal with. Think about this the next time you come away from an interaction not feeling great. What is that emotion?
• “Happiness is the joy you find on hundreds of forgettable Wednesdays”. To the camp professionals out there: how many camp forgettable days do we just let whiff by us? 

Ari Polsky is a marketing & fundraising consultant. You can reach him at [email protected]