Reflection, Dishwasher, Gas Pump & Toilet Paper Roll

Reflect! You might be building Culture, not a Product. I certainly was. 

Let's talk about Reflection. When I reflect on the good that comes with cold Swedish winter I think the best time of Swedish winter is back end of it, February/March when we get a few cold sunny days…

On a day during the back end of Swedish winter a few years back, I’d like to take you to mid point of a phone interview I had. At this point, I was feeling on top of my game. I thought I was nailing it. I knew what it was all about, had explained both micro tactical actions and macro strategic vision I had in my mind. I was basically killin’ it. Then came this point when the interviewer asked me “What do you think about culture”. I gave them the 'Oh I know what you’re asking here'  look and started explaining how I liked and supported diversity as in how many cultures I have in my team, cultural diversity brings success, yada… 

Then came the mortifying ordeal! While it was great for the interviewer to know my thoughts on diversity, they interrupted me and said “I meant to ask about the culture in your organization as its Leader”. I felt things. I winced in agony. Shamed, Distressed, Exposed, Mistrusted, Worthless, Powerless are the names my shrink would call the things I felt. I barely remember the second half of that conversation. I buried myself into the abyss of failure that evening. It dawned on me 'I had failed to reflect on my Leadership Journey'. I wasn’t working just, on developing technology. I was, in fact Building A Culture. 

That call showed me how important it was to exercise Reflection. To look at what I did, am doing & will do. To look at what I thought, was thinking and will think. To look at what I said, was saying and will say… 

Next day was a wonderful winter day, I pulled myself out of bed, put on a brave face and went to work. Later that afternoon I worked out with my buddy in the park. I saw this old man walk by us with his eyes focused on the ground. I told myself he is very likely reflecting on his life. I wanted to go to him and tell him “Hey I am reflecting too”. I didn’t do it though.

Reflection is such an important part of my journey leading myself and leading others. It’s how I realize the importance of life’s biggest questions like ‘Best way to load the dishwasher’ or ‘Whether to hang toilet paper over/in front of the roll or under/behind it’. I believe us humans are analog circuitries not digital. Reflection is what gets me on the journey to find peaks & limits that define me and those I can travel beyond. Reflection is what taught me I like to dress up in alternative ways to build a culture where experimentation is just as welcome as routines and processes are.

While we reflect, there is this question that arises "How to reflect". We gotta compare self-introspection to ‘reflection with your network (caregivers or those you’re in charge of)’. Sometimes we gotta ask “What” sometimes “Why”. However that’s a whole other topic. A topic where we discuss how Tim Minchin annoyingly sends the message 'There is no meaning – stop finding it'. 

For now, I cap this dump of thoughts off by taking you back to the park scene where I worked out. I stopped by a gas pump to gas up my car (not a favorite chore). While I stuck the gas pump nozzle into my car that day, I realized (~1 millionth time) the importance of refueling. I wouldn’t be able to drive if I didn’t refuel. I think you get the metaphor I am going for, I needed to refuel myself just like my car. And I had found an important fuel for my journey “Reflection”. I promised myself to stop by the ‘reflection gas pump’ regularly, reflect and refuel.

And if you wonder what happened to that interview. Well, it wasn’t really an interview. It was just a respected leader of mine testing me for a potential promotion and coaching me by asking provocative questions. They coached me that day without saying the word advice or coach one single time. I figured this, by reflecting!

PS1 : The blurry picture you see at the start is from the workout day, I went through my Instagram story archive to pull it out. That old man can be seen in the background...

So to you all, Reflect! you might be having a Promotion Interview, not just a phone call.

PS1.1 : If you read this in public, I hope you wore a mask while...

PS1.2 : The overt use of quotes "" above is just because...