REFLECTING ON THE PAST - PRESENT & FUTURE…

At the end of every year, many folks share their reflections, for me this years reflection is focused on who I am and how I might be perceived.? TBH, I was passed over for a gig that was perfect for my skillset and sensibility.? By passed over I mean not even considered. A job that in the past I would have been at the top any list. It never really gets easy, but at this point in my career, I take these hits in stride, I’m not sure I have a choice.? However,? that doesn’t mean I wasn’t manifesting like an MF, you know imagining getting the call that you were the ‘chosen one', you can see yourself on the plane to location, hiring crew and the excitement that that brings (I mean giving people jobs is one of the best parts of being the boss) prepping, laughing and having fun with the producers and agency, and of course going through the process of filming each and every scene. You even picture the pats on the back and drinks afterwards. But somewhere in all of that, you have to keep your armor close by for the chance of rejection.? So how does one balance the positive manifesting energy with the protective? I kinda don’t know, but I know, and more than not, as the song by Passion Pit, suggests I 'Take a Walk' : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZX6Q-Bj_xg

Which reminds me, in the name of reflecting, when my kids were much younger, my daughter and I use to exchange music mixes on CD’s, yes I still have them, one of the songs she included was ‘Take a Walk’. Hearing the lyrics became a profound moment for me. Did my young daughter have an intuitive insight into my life and who I am? I mean of course I wanted that to be true, just as I wanted to have an understanding of who she is and would become. So anytime I hear or think of that song, I think back to that time with such fondness that my heart swoons with nostalgia.

Now, dance with me, let me take you back to January 2019, pre-pandemic, pre- a lot of weird shit, which then causes me to reflect on my friends and family who have left this planet and how much life or at least my life has changed.? To a degree, it’s ‘End of the Innocence’ in a different wrapper, which then makes me ponder, I do that a lot, has anyone reconfigured that song to reflect these past few years of strangeness??

Ok, I just returned to those lyrics and by gum, they still work, disregard that last sentence. (here is a link, if you’re curious: https://genius.com/Don-henley-the-end-of-the-innocence-lyrics)

So here we are, 2019, I made my debut performance on Jordan Brady’s, Respect the Process podcast. Like most January’s I am newly energized by the dawn of a new year, heading in 2019 I was launching headlong into the production of FEAR (see trailer in this link), the film I lensed in 2019. A post apocalyptic pandemic film.? Who knew one year later...We’d be knee deep in a real pandemic! Here for your listening pleasure is that same podcast: https://jordanbrady.com/director-cinematographer-jimmy-matlosz-has-worked-almost-every-job-on-set/

I guess for me, the cool thing is, I have a pre-pandemic time capsule, thanks to Jordan! If I recall, our episode made the top 10 list for 2019. So ego aside, which we do discuss on the podcast, I realized I should be sharing this interview in my Linked In newsletter. It offers a glimpse into who I am. I must admit, ego aside again, I am quite proud it, the subjects we covered and the comedy that ensued. Ok I am exaggerating, but it has some funny moments. A little secret, in case you were wondering and TBH with myself, you’re probably not, I didn’t adhere to one of the tenants I subscribe to: Yes! I did use the restroom prior-to, but NO! I didn’t eat and I was potentially hopped up on caffeine. To my pleasure, I couldn’t tell I was loopy in the head, which lets me know, maybe, just maybe, I have it together after all, agency who didn’t hire me, be damned!? Ok I had to say that…No, I don’t mean literally damned, I mean you know, I 'Took A Walk!' (note, if you do listen to the podcast, Jordan mentioned his son Ben, who I met shortly afterwards. I then hired him, not based on our meeting, but a recommendation from a colleague. We worked together on a handful of gigs, I mentored him for while, he happily called me ‘Uncle Jimmy’)

Thinking further about 2019, my son had yet to graduate High School, my daughter was in her second year of college, I had completed 3 screenplays and we were all hurdling at 1.6 million miles per day into a global shut down. I have since moved a few times and found true LOVE! I have Five screenplays and One pilot completed, My daughter is a nurse and my son, upon college graduation in May, will be working for the Forest Service, fighting forest fires. Last summer, after his first tour with the Forest Service, my son looked at me and asked, ‘Did you ever think both your kids would be First Responders?’ Yeah, proud Dad moment! Well,? I guess I did something right with them. LIFE IS GOOD!

Now and with all seriousness:

How do I get back on top of those GO-TO lists?

Stay Tuned…