Recognizing the Systems We Create: Lessons from a Barking Dog

This morning, I found myself retrieving my dog’s ball from under a piece of furniture for what felt like the hundredth time. Each time the ball rolls out of reach, my dog barks, I fetch it, and the cycle begins again. As I bent down to grab the ball yet again, I had a realization: this simple, repetitive action wasn’t just a one-off interaction. It was a system—a feedback loop we’d both created without even thinking about it.

This got me wondering: how often do we, as leaders and individuals, find ourselves in similar patterns? What behaviours and systems do we unconsciously reinforce in our teams, our families, or even ourselves?

The System at Work

In the case of my dog, the system is clear. He’s learned that barking gets results: I retrieve the ball. I’ve learned that retrieving the ball stops the barking. It’s a perfectly functional loop, but it’s also entirely self-perpetuating. Neither of us pauses to question whether this is the best approach; we continue because it works in the moment.

This type of feedback loop isn’t limited to dogs and their owners. Consider an example from leadership: imagine a manager who constantly jumps in to solve their team’s problems. Over time, the team learns that raising an issue will result in the manager taking action. The manager, in turn, feels validated by being helpful and indispensable. But what happens next? The team becomes increasingly dependent, innovation slows, and the manager becomes overwhelmed. What started as a well-intentioned behaviour has created a system that limits growth on both sides.

How We Do This to Ourselves

It’s not just about teams or dogs. We also create feedback loops in our own lives without even realizing it—patterns of behaviour that feel automatic, like they just “are” and don’t need thought. These loops might seem harmless at first, but over time, they shape our actions and outcomes in ways we rarely stop to examine.

Take overcommitment, for example. Someone asks for help, and without hesitation, you say “yes.” You help them out, and the gratitude you receive feels good—so the next time they ask, you say “yes” again. The cycle repeats, becoming an unthinking response. Before long, you’ve taken on so much that burnout looms, yet the loop carries on, fueled by the habit of saying “yes.”

Avoidance works in much the same way. A conflict or unpleasant task appears, and rather than face it, you avoid it. The problem doesn’t go away—in fact, it might worsen—but avoiding it feels easier than confronting it. When the issue resurfaces, you sidestep it again, reinforcing the habit of delay. Over time, unresolved tensions or tasks pile up, even as you convince yourself you’re “keeping the peace.”

Perfectionism creates its own loop. You start a task and quickly lose yourself in revisions and refinements, reluctant to call it finished. Each time you review your work, you find something new to tweak, which delays completion and increases your stress. The loop continues as you tell yourself it must be “perfect” before it’s done.

Micromanagement, too, is a common trap. You delegate a task but worry it won’t meet your standards. Stepping in feels like the easiest way to ensure it’s done “right,” so you take over. This teaches your team to rely on you for guidance or correction, reinforcing your need to intervene. The more you micromanage, the more dependent your team becomes, and the cycle feeds itself.

Procrastination is another familiar loop. You see a task you don’t want to do—cleaning the garage, for instance—and you find something else to focus on instead. The task sits undone, waiting, but the temporary relief from avoiding it feels good. The next time you think about tackling it, the same avoidance kicks in, and the loop repeats.

Sometimes, these loops even combine. Picture this: you overcommit, filling your time with tasks for others. Your schedule feels so packed that you keep postponing the garage cleanup or that difficult conversation you’ve been dreading. The “busy-ness” of your commitments becomes a shield against facing what you don’t want to do. The loop reinforces itself, as taking on more makes you feel productive while the task you’re avoiding grows larger and more daunting in your mind.

These loops all share a common thread, they operate on autopilot. They’re fueled by short-term rewards or relief but often lead to long-term frustration, burnout, or stagnation. The first step to breaking free is recognizing the patterns for what they are. Once you do, you can start asking yourself: Does this serve me, or am I stuck in a loop I’ve unconsciously created?

Breaking Free: Awareness is the First Step

Awareness opens the door to change, but breaking these loops requires action. Take a step back and ask:

·??What behaviours am I reinforcing?

·??What outcomes am I unintentionally encouraging?

·??Does this pattern serve my long-term goals, or just the immediate moment?

Breaking free might mean setting boundaries, encouraging others to take ownership, or pausing to reflect before acting. In my case, it might mean teaching my dog to retrieve his ball himself or, at the very least, reconsidering the furniture design in my home.

The Leadership Connection

Leadership is full of these loops, both visible and invisible. Whether it’s a habit of always solving problems for your team, rewarding speed over quality, or avoiding conflict in the name of harmony, the systems we create can shape our teams’ behaviours for better or worse. The first step to leading more effectively is recognizing these patterns and deciding whether they align with your vision for growth and success.

So, the next time you find yourself stuck in a repetitive cycle—whether it’s chasing a ball or chasing deadlines—pause and reflect. Recognizing the systems we create is the first step to shaping them intentionally.

As for my dog and me, our feedback loop remains firmly in place. He barks, I fetch, and the cycle continues. But hey, at least I’m getting up once an hour, hitting my stand goal, and squeezing in a bit of cardio on the stairs. Who knew that chasing a ball could count as part of a wellness routine? Sometimes, even when we recognize our loops, it’s okay to let a few stick around—especially if they keep us and our four-legged companions happy.