Reciprocity

Introduction

Reciprocity is a fundamental principle in human relationships, where people reward kind acts and punish unkind ones [4]. It is a moral norm that constitutes an important causal force in social life [1]. Reciprocity is vital for building long-term professional and personal relationships, as it affects trust in these relationships [2]. In this article, we will analyze reciprocity as a moral norm and explore the importance of reciprocity for building long-term professional and personal relationships. We will explain how individuals that don't reciprocate fail to maintain long-term relationships and how successful individuals learn and maintain solid bonds through reciprocity. We will also discuss how reciprocity affects trust in professional relationships and strategies for cultivating reciprocity in personal and professional relationships. Finally, we will touch upon the success of people who help each other versus people who act alone.

Reciprocity as a Moral Norm

Reciprocity is a moral norm that is one of the universal “principal components” of moral codes [6] which in turn become laws. Many of us are familiarized with the principle of Natural Law, which is a theory in ethics and philosophy that says that human beings possess intrinsic values that govern their reasoning and behavior. We know naturally that we should pursue good and avoid evil. Reciprocity is a pattern of mutually contingent exchange of gratifications, where people reward kind actions and punish unkind ones [6]. Reciprocity is a duty that is probably everywhere, at least under certain circumstances, regarded as a duty [6]. It is a guiding principle in research, where reviewing someone else's paper may be perceived as one of the less obvious ways of reciprocating [3]. Reciprocity is developed and woven into good enough relationships, sometimes without participants knowing that is what they are doing [2]. The principle of reciprocity is one of the basic lessons for selling anything; companies constantly engage in giving out samples or tokens in exchange for potential clients’ time and interest. Some of the best salespersons I have ever met started the conversation with gratuitous praise and acknowledgment that engaged the customer’s ego while addressing their practical needs. They made me feel good about meeting my needs “my way “while purchasing their product or service. I also felt a little guilty when I was given something and took it but didn’t have the time or inclination to listen to their pitch.

Importance of Reciprocity for Building Long-Term Professional and Personal Relationships

Reciprocity is vital for building long-term professional and personal relationships [2]. For intimate relationships to grow and become healthy, lasting, and committed, reciprocity is vital [2]. Human beings keep score unconsciously. If the person feels they are doing most of the giving, the bond is eventually unhealthy. Some folks think much more about what they are getting than what they are giving. If you don’t find joy in giving to a significant other because they never want to give back, then it’s time to talk. Reciprocity requires people to be invested in their relationships. If a relationship is important enough to them, partners will be emotionally invested in it enough to work at building and maintaining it [2]. People willing to give up on their relationships whenever it becomes uncomfortable or hard are doomed to live with unreliable, shallow connections. Reciprocity is even essential in participatory and other types of research, where it describes the respectful nature of good research relationships and essential exchanges [5].

Failure to Reciprocate and Its Consequences

Individuals that don't reciprocate fail to maintain long-term relationships [2]. They may be perceived as selfish, untrustworthy, and unreliable [2]. Failure to reciprocate can lead to the breakdown of relationships, creating an imbalance in the relationship [2]. It can also lead to a lack of trust, as the non-reciprocating individual may be perceived as taking advantage of the other person [2]. I have often met people who think they are smarter because they are always a step ahead in getting the most out of their connections. This is a mistaken approach; one should build uncollected favors or capital for when a real need or want arises. If you don’t have any reciprocated capital in the bank, your request for support may be automatically denied. I suggest that we stay away from people who are out to get “theirs” and search for people who are out giving their “all” without recompense as their only motivator. You deserve them, and they deserve you.

Learning and Maintaining Solid Bonds through Reciprocity

Successful individuals learn and maintain solid bonds through reciprocity [2]. They understand that reciprocity cannot be exact because what one person can do, another person cannot [2]. They recognize reciprocity as a valuable principle, like the Golden Rule [2]. They cultivate reciprocity by being kind, helpful, and supportive to others without expecting anything in return [2]. They also understand that reciprocity requires time and effort and is a long-term investment in the relationship [2]. One of life’s most important lessons is that every person is a gift. There are special skills, talents, and abilities that all human beings possess. Your competence in another field complements my competence in one field. Together we make a stronger force, even if all you do is cheer me on.

Reciprocity and Trust in Professional Relationships

Reciprocity affects trust in professional relationships [2]. When individuals reciprocate, they create a sense of trust and reliability in the relationship [2]. I love it when my colleagues and friends know they can rely on me. It empowers me to do the right thing by them, and I do it joyfully. Don’t just wait to call a friend only when you need or want something from them; touch base with them if you can, but even if you can’t, always acknowledge your appreciation for the connection. This trust can increase collaboration and communication and improve outcomes [2]. Reciprocity is essential in building networks and establishing professional reputations [2]. Individuals who help others are more likely to be helped in return and more likely to be seen as trustworthy and reliable [2]. Individuals who only come looking for assistance and never give back don’t understand reciprocity and fail to maintain strong, long-term bonds. When a real bond is formed, years can go by and be picked up where it left off easily because there are no unfulfilled obligations or expectations; we know that we are good and that we are busy with life, but we are still here for each other.

Strategies for Cultivating Reciprocity in Personal and Professional Relationships

Several strategies for cultivating reciprocity in personal and professional relationships [2]. These include:

- Being kind, helpful, and supportive to others without expecting anything in return.

- Recognizing that reciprocity requires time and effort and that it is a long-term investment in the relationship.

- Being aware of the strengths and weaknesses of others and finding ways to complement them.

- Being emotionally invested in the relationship and working at building and maintaining it.

- Being open and honest in communication and avoiding hidden agendas or ulterior motives.

- Learn to listen by remembering you have two ears and only one mouth, so use accordingly.

The success of People Who Help Each Other versus People Who Act Alone

People who help each other are more successful than people who act alone [2]. They are more likely to build strong networks, establish professional reputations, and achieve their goals [2]. They are also more likely to be seen as trustworthy, and reliable and to be helped in return [2]. In contrast, people who act alone may be perceived as selfish, untrustworthy, and unreliable and struggle to achieve their goals [2]. As an immigrant, I have always been interested in cultural dynamics. I find it fascinating how one community can be so close and helpful to one another while others don’t. What is it that makes us want to help someone and not another? Similarity, we identify with people like us, who think as we do and look like we do and reject those who don’t. Successful people identify common goals and dismiss common differences to build strong, successful teams that take advantage of each other’s talents and skills to get the job done despite superficial differences. It’s a terrible myth in our society that meritocracy requires us to pull ourselves by our bootstraps when most successful people rely on others for their success. If you don’t know something, ask, and if you know something, offer.

Conclusion

Reciprocity is a fundamental principle in human relationships, where people reward kind acts and punish unkind ones. It is a moral norm that is vital for building long-term professional and personal relationships, as it affects trust in these relationships. Individuals that don't reciprocate fail to maintain long-term relationships, while successful individuals learn and maintain solid bonds through reciprocity. Reciprocity affects trust in professional relationships, and there are several strategies for cultivating reciprocity in personal and professional relationships. People who help each other are much more successful than people who act alone. Relationships are based on the principle of reciprocity, so give as much as you can so that you can expect a helping hand when times get tough.

Citations:

[1] https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0265407595124001

[2] https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/relationship-reciprocity/

[3] https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10994-020-05892-6

[4] https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0899825605000254

[5] https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/1476750307083720

[6] https://www.jstor.org/stable/2092623