Recipe for a “Wisconsin Winter”
I believe that many have seen the weather in the Northern U.S. lately and how the weather is just being flat out mean. Been there... Done that! (It's why I live in Texas now!)
Just thought I would attempt to explain to the Southerners that here's what it's like "partying" with 'Old Man Winter', when he's feeling grumpy.
- Begin with approximately 9 inches of snow.
- Add 25 to 40 mph cold wind.
- Mix in a couple hundred pounds per square yard of sleeting and freezing rain or what we Northerners call “ICE” (You can find this anywhere in Wisconsin this time of year)
- Make sure Ice Chopper, Shovels, Snow Blower, Ax, and Flame Thrower are still usable from last year’s recipe. Also, check your supply of C-4 Explosives (In case of EMERGENCY)
- Drop in 6 to 8 more inches of snow and reduce heat by 40 degrees.
- Hope that you don’t have anywhere to go or anything to do.
- Pray if you do.
- Call your friends and/or relatives that live in a nice warm climate that have never endured the wrath of a winter season and tell them you wish they were here with you.
- Simmer your patience 4 to 7 days with minus zero temperatures until recipe is frozen solid.
- Wait 3 to 5 days for recipe to thaw and ENJOY!