Reasons Why You Can’t Write A Book And How To Get Through It
Nothing to do with how to write a book, but this morning I was pondering the life, Universe and what it would need for me to make a cake? I have deliberately not purchased anything gluten-free and sweet and I want cake, so it occupies the top of my mind.
In second place for today at least has been some important journaling moments for me which make me feel like I am flirting with vulnerability and I feel uncomfortable. When I looked at my beliefs around these things I started to ponder why it is that some people who have a massive desire to write a book never do.
To be honest with you, I have books I have written and I doubt I will ever publish, but I have decided to blog them. It feels the right thing to do.
All of my writing starts as journals and these are typically turned into blog posts. While I have aspirations to turn some of my life stories into a book, something says that’s not right for me at the moment. My books remain practical, books about writing and journaling and that feels perfect.
I have a sense of acceptance this morning of what I want to publish, what will remain as naked dances in my journal, what will become blogs to inspire others and what I will put out there as a book to build my brand.
But something else happened this morning, I reached into my soul and asked my muse what would I really love to write?
Recently I was asked a question about working with A list celebrities. My response was to work with Lily Tomlin on the script of Grace and Frankie. This was because I wanted to learn how to write in a fun way and of course, hang out with two amazing ladies. How I love that program.
What I find is with myself and my clients there is always a reason why we don’t write or we do write and don’t publish. It’s exploring what lies beneath and then deciding what to do.
As I was journaling anyway, I made some notes about why I think some people can’t or won’t write a book and here they are.
You need to heal some more of your stuff before you can commit to writing a book
“Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart.” William Wordsworth
I often find that people want to write, start and give up because they are still in the story. The story has not been resolved and in reality, they need more healing.
In this case, I would use the book outline to look for healing themes and work on these. Journal the journey. Reflect and look for insights and aha’s. You will, if you decide to publish, have a much better book and will be able to serve your clients from a stronger position.
You are unclear of your direction
So many times I hear someone say, I want to write a book for my business about this or that. However, when we explore you can feel that the energy of the book is not there. Something doesn’t add up.
When the conversation opens up, what is revealed is that the aspiring author really wants to do something else but is fearful. Often this is because they are unclear about their direction. Something else is calling to their hearts.
In this case, I would suggest getting a journal for the journey and start exploring with say an IKIGAI exercise. This is where you look at what you love doing, what you are good at, what the world needs and what you can be paid for. There’s a key to doing this so that you don’t just write ‘coaching’ in every box. Look out for another blog where I describe how to get the best out of IKIGAI.
After this, it’s about noticing what comes up for you and recording that in your journal.
You are at a crossroads
“I speak to the paper, as I speak to the first person I meet.” Michel de Montaigne
This is like looking into the void and wondering what next? It’s not always about direction, this always feels bigger and life-changing. Like there’s more at play than the direction of your business. This is bigger and has life echoes in it too. The let’s pack a rucksack and run away to run a bar in the sun kind of crossroads.
What to do eh? Crossroads can be tricky, but also full of opportunity.
I remember being at a crossroads and a decision was made for me. I discovered something my then husband was doing (it would make a great novel) and six weeks later I moved country and started a new life.
My journal once again saved my life. My suggestion would be to take a step back, journal and when you are ready to ask for support.
The book idea may change. It could be about what you did in your crossroads period. All lessons learned are usually the things we teach.
You have lost focus and this feels overwhelming
When there is no focus, everything feels overwhelming. Your energy is scattered, nothing makes sense and if you are anything like me you may even shed a few tears. That’s great, get it out!
Again, get that journal out, write and if that feels stuck use journaling prompts. Give yourself space. Ideas come in the spaces, it’s where opportunities lurk.
Do the IKIGAI exercise (coming in another post). Set some goals. Put a 90-day plan together and get an accountability buddy or coach.
You are scared to share
I get this. It can feel vulnerable sharing your stuff, but if you don’t it will die in you and you will not have served the people that need to hear you.
Here’s the thing, you do not have to write a book right now. Hold that intention. Instead, map out the outline and blog it. As you release smaller chunks you will get used to the writing process, you will find your writers voice and you will get feedback. Best of all your confidence will grow.
When I look at blogs I wrote just a few years ago, I can see how my style has grown and changed.
Have faith and take baby steps.
You have other fears
“Don’t write what you know—what you know may bore you, and thus bore your readers. Write about what interests you—and interests you deeply—and your readers will catch fire at your words.” Valerie Sherwood
We all have stuff that bubbles beneath the surface. We may suppress it or be unaware of how it is holding us back. You may not even know that you have a particular fear or fears in combination that limit you.
You know what I am going to say talk to someone and journal. It is in the reflection when we are being truly honest with ourselves that the shit rises. I like the layers of the onion I peel daily. They don’t always feel good, but I know that it’s important to uncover stuff, forgive, be grateful and let go.
When you have walked through the fire and written your words then you can think about which book, why and when.
Here’s a bit of a strategy
- Release your inner book through your journal. Go and buy one or twenty. Dig out an unused one. Just start.
- Write in a way that suits you – freestyle or via prompts
- Listen to that quiet inner voice
- Reflect often
- Ask for support
Writing journeys
101 days of being me is 101 daily reflective prompts which will get you thinking, writing and reflecting.
101 questions to ask before writing a book is 101 questions that will help you to find clarity in all aspects of your book journey.
Blog your book is an online course for when you feel like jumping and getting on with it
Whatever you do, make it work for you.
What can you do next? Chat to me about planning your book marketing, blogging or writing your book.