The Reality of the Polarizing Content Creator

Writing this edition of 'Mental Health Motivated,' is a risk. Some close to me will be less than enthused that I am choosing to bring light to something that in getting in the way of potential opportunity and has been a barrier.

The reason I am choosing to address what I will in the body of this newsletter is to get it out in the open and perhaps shed some light that has not been shed before. I want to provide context and clarity and if this still results in those barriers remaining or going higher, then at least it will not be for lack of context.

Let's get to it.

I am a polarizing content creator

Over the last six years I have spoken about:

• Anti-racism
• women's rights
• menopause
• maternal rights
• eating disorders
• body dysmorphia
• domestic violence
• sexual assault
• anxiety, depression
• neurodiversity, disability
• how corporations are tone deaf

and more...much more

I have created and hosted live events on the subjects including the son of a woman killed in the Topps shooting in Buffalo

Many of the things I have spoken about most people avoid talking about in their personal lives, much less on social media.

Due to my views, corporations have labeled me 'a liability, untouchable, not worth the risk.'

I've had friends be told to distance themselves from me due to 'guilty by association.'

I've had groups target me and report me to get me banned.

The result is sitting here, writing this newsletter with a negative in my bank account, barely any job prospects alone and depressed.

But is this the whole story? No, I don't think so.

Finding your voice takes time

Most people learn social nuance from an early age. They identify how to speak, both verbally and physically depending on the situation over time.

As someone that grew up with ADHD and a Language Processing Disorder, I learned to keep my mouth shut. To keep my opinions to myself. I didn't understand how to act and react in a neurotypical way.

I never felt comfortable smiling and sitting in one place was next to impossible.

Over time I figured out what was important to me, like women's and disability rights but I mostly deferred to others and worked for them to help create change. I wasn't basing anything on my opinion. In fact, I didn't know I could HAVE an opinion.

It was only when I accepted my ADHD when I came on LI at the start of the pandemic that I started speaking my truth and having real conversations.

I never expected people to follow me, to want to hear my voice, to listen to me for inspiration.

In effect, I had to 'learn on the job' and that included a lot of growing pains.

As I spoke out more and more I felt I had to use my platform for the greater good and I acted without always thinking about how I was acting.

This was especially true when I met Future Cain . Future, for those that don't know was the catalyst for me working (and living) in the world of anti-racism. It was a trial by fire and as I learned more and more about things like drowned towns, redlining, CRT etc I began thinking and creating content in absolutes.

It was all 'this is right and this is wrong.' There was no gray area. Though, I primarily still feel this to be true, the real mistake was in how I communicated this knowledge.

I was seen as abrasive, hard core and controversial and based on the language I used, the passion I conveyed during live interviews and podcasts I do not blame people for thinking this way.

I had no consideration for the feelings of others and I definitely had no interest in 'meeting people where they are.'

The Hyperfocus

With how dialed in I was, with how 'Hyperfocused,' I was, there were some real benefits. I got a TON of work accomplished while at Amazon to build inclusive and diverse teams and programs.

I earned the trust of those in marginalized communities who saw that I was all in.

I Made Mistakes but then I Changed

Looking back, I do not blame anyone for wanting to distance themselves from me. I can't blame corporations for not wanting me to work for them. Even those that believed I had great ideas and was heart centered could not have liked how I communicated those thoughts and feelings. I was intense at a time in which intensity did not create change, empathy did.

With Time Comes Humility

I don't know if it was the fact that I got let go last year, I couldn't isolate one specific thing but with time came self awareness.

As someone who prides themselves on being super self aware, I am always looking at how I am doing things to see how I can improve.

All I know is I woke up one morning realizing that no matter how heart centered I am, people were not seeing that because of the way I was acting. I had to check myself.

I spent a lot of time in introspection and then depression looking at not only what I should have done different, but what I needed to adjust going forward.

I identified those areas I wanted to focus on and what that looked like.

Those that truly know me, the Future, Gabe Leal Crystle Johnson Michele Olivier ????? Cherita Washington, MBA Toni McLelland MSc FRSA 's of the world, know that while some may see me as loud, the reality is that I am hypersensitive, care a ton about what people think about me, have high levels of anxiety and scrutinize everything I do. Behind closed doors, I am reserved and quiet and even a little scared.

In order to move forward, I needed to not completely change what I was doing, but to showcase more of the side of myself I never thought anyone wanted to see. That combination is the key to my growth.

From a content perspective, I understood I wanted to focus on areas that I could make a difference which meant sharing my story of having an eating disorder and body dysmorphia since I was 11 and that I am a domestic violence and sexual assault survivor since I was 19.

I still will talk about anti-racism and inclusion but these are things as a cis white male, it is important for me to speak about because of how few others actually do.

I shifted my moniker from 'The Honest Recruiter' to 'The Honest Accomplice,' to Mental Health Motivated. Why this shift? Because even when my mental health is at its worst, I am still mental health motivated. I still want to normalize conversations and bring awareness that others are not alone.

The other aspect is that when you are mental health motivated there is a higher focus on how I come across and ultimately how what I do affects others.

Keeping that at the forefront is a constant reminder that helps me keep centered.

Do People Care to See how a Person Changed?

Do people care? That is the million dollar question.

Human beings are not meant to stay stagnant and are constantly evolving. But, does a first impression prohibit others being open to that change?

I honestly don't know.

In my case, I feel like I've made incredible progress over the last five years. I am proud of what I have accomplished and understand that I had to go through these trials to get to where I am.

I believe, most neurodiverse individuals will understand that all too well.

What I do know is that the mistakes I have made during this learning process are certainly affecting how I am viewed today.

I get less opportunities whether it is paid speaking engagements or jobs because of the content I post and the fact that people can just look at my profile and see it, I have no place to hide, even if I wanted to.

I really hope this changes, because I am really REALLY good at the work I do, and like to think of myself as a 'learned leader.'

I guess we will see in time (hopefully not too much time)

Closing Thoughts

I want to be clear, wishing I had gone about things differently, does not mean I regret what I have done, the people and issues I have stood up for at all. I don't.

Writing this newsletter is not about regret, it is about growth. It is understanding that you can not judge every book by it's cover and sometimes a series of books have a common theme but totally different storylines.

This is also not a ploy to help get me hired.

I just wanted to get it all out in the open because part of mental health is making sure you take care of that which is boiling under the surface and this really has been boiling for way too long.

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To all of you reading this, thank you. You have given me the greatest gift anyone has ever given me...you have made me feel accepted, seen and appreciated.

I can't wait for the next chapter.

With Love,

Dan