To Be Real

As part of a leadership development course I attended a few years back we were read a quote from the Velveteen Rabbit about what it means to be real.

‘Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.'

'Does it hurt?' asked the Rabbit.

'Sometimes,' said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. 'When you are Real you don't mind being hurt.'

'Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,' he asked, 'or bit by bit?'

'It doesn't happen all at once,' said the Skin Horse. 'You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.

― Margery Williams Bianco, The Velveteen Rabbit

In the context of our always-on, social media driven world where leaders are always visible, this feels quite special. As a leader we need to ensure that we live with integrity, authentically and true to ourselves. We must ensure that we live by our core beliefs, stand up for what is just and right, and protect the values we hold dear. Being able to do this in a world that expects conformity, in which individualism is sometimes oppressed or hidden due to fear of isolation or ridicule is unique and shows a strength from within that embodies true leadership.

Being Real hurts sometime, you don’t become all at once and it doesn’t happen to everyone (and apparently you could loose some hair?).

But now that you know, you cant unknow…