Ready, steady, Interview!

Most women I work with don't like - and are horrible at - talking about what they are good at.

Oh sure, they can trot out a bit of a spiel in a?proposal or to fill out an annual review form that HR are chasing them for. But for the most part, they are not good at talking about themselves in a impactful or meaningful way.

This is really problematic when it comes to preparing for panels, promotions, interviews or any situation requiring self?advocacy.?

And it's why I LOVE helping women prepare for panels, for interviews and especially that - 'I would actually rather gauge my eyeballs out'?- pre-promotion question?you might be avoiding asking your boss right now:

'Am I going to be promoted this year?'

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Because the preparation for any of these kinds of conversations, begins on the level of?our thinking about ourselves. Otherwise? We're selling a pup. We're trying to make someone else believe someone is true about us but we don't really know what that actually is AND we don't believe it ourselves. This is hard.

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The resistance we have to speaking about ourselves objectively makes?absolute sense in the context of the?'nice girls not talking themselves up and putting their heads down and letting our work speak for itself', memos we've been?receiving for decades. But it makes zero sense in the context of you selling a potential employer or boss on why you. Imagine walking into a car showroom - actually interested in buying that car - and when the car sales man comes out of his office and you ask him to tell you about the car, he laughs nervously and looks to the floor. He doesn't want to toot his own horn but this is a really good car. Everyone who has it says so.

Compelling? Exciting? Not so much.

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Getting comfortable talking about what you're good at - to yourself, first and foremost and then putting that into words is simply a way for you a human to tell?another human how you're the right person to help them.

That's?it.?

?If the first time you're saying it is in an interview for a role you'd love and KNOW you'd be great at, you're not only doing yourself a disservice but also your employer isn't?getting a full understanding of what it is you're bringing to the table. Because....you - as their introduction to you - don't really understand it.

Even if you're not preparing for an interview or panel or anything of the like right now, I want to invite you to do the following exercise with respect to the role you're currently in.

And if you?are?preparing to interview, then don't even THINK about skipping over this or sliding this email into your 'maybe later' folder. I MEAN IT ??

?Write out the answers to these questions:

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1. What skillset does the role require??I want to invite you to consider this question in context of the value exchange you're entering into: You will be paid a salary in exchange for which skills? Write out those skills.
2. What is is that you think and do that lend yourself well to that skillset??What you will be most tempted to believe here is that there isn't anything special about what you do - sounds like 'sure everyone does/should do that' in your head. This sentence is a LIE. Everyone doesn't do it. You do, though. Write down what it is you THINK and DO and take credit for the words you see on the paper.

Here are some examples:

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Managing a team is valuable and a required skill

I THINK people do their best when they understand exactly what's expected of them.

I DO - take time to ensure that work I delegate is understood on the level of outcomes, with clearly stated deliverables and due dates, together with a plan for communication milestones I expect?them to meet as work is?ongoing.

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Completing large projects on time is valuable and a required skill

I THINK having?perspective of how the project will play out realistically is a key success factor and I'm THINKING about this from the very outset of the project.?

I DO - take time to plan in a meaningful,?rise focussed way,?drawing on my significant experience of projects I've managed in the past.?

I DO - consider risks comprehensively and in a meaningful way from the very beginning.

I DO - involve the team and client in these discussions.

I DO - prepare a plan with reporting milestones that I DO work back from so as to have no surprises in real time as work progresses.

I DO - communicate in a time efficient way with the team and take responsibility for knowing what information I need to get from them.

Do you see?

If you've been passed over for promotions, question your worth in the role you're in, are holding yourself back from a promotion or talking yourself into being fine where you are, this is such important work for you to make an hour or two for.

AND, I want you to know:?

Doing this work will most likely feel clunky and?uncomfortable.

You'll not want to do it.

You'll believe your brain when it says -?I'll sit down and do it one day?- because we've not been taught the importance of being able to steadily and certainly the value we bring. We've been implicitly - and sometimes explicitly instructed - that nice girls don't toot their own horns. They put down their heads and get on with the work and wait for someone to notice the great stuff they're doing. This strategy is a sure way to make certain that others are fuzzy about how valuable you are to the work your team and firm do. This equals less opportunity.

All this is to say - do this work.

Let me know how you get on?