Read This if You’ve Ever Felt Guilty…

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“Mommy, do you love your clients more than you love me?”

Oof. He went there.

I’d just told my young son I wouldn’t see him in the morning because I had an early flight. His response tugged at my heartstrings. If you’re a parent or caretaker, I’m sure you can relate.

I said, “honey, I love you and your sister more than anything in the world. And I love my job. I wouldn’t be the best mommy I could be if I didn’t have my work. Every minute I’m away from you is really hard, but I have so much joy when I come back.”

Here’s the thing: My work is a really important part of who I am. And so is my family. I want to have both—and I can.

But not if I work a third shift.?

Let me explain.?

What’s the “Third Shift”?

Right after I got married, I heard an impactful piece of advice from another professional woman: Don’t work the third shift.

The wisdom wasn’t about working the graveyard shift. It was about the “shift” you voluntarily take on by feeling guilty that you’re not doing enough during your first shift — work — and second shift — taking care of yourself, your family, and your community.

Let me be clear: forgoing the third shift is not about doing more or being perfect. It’s about embracing “the good enough” approach to being a parent, a professional — or a person.?

It’s the idea of seeking harmony among your life’s priorities rather than trying to maintain that elusive balance.

This advice stuck with me, and now I share it with others because we all tend to volunteer to “work a third shift.” We constantly worry we’re not doing enough: taking on extra assignments at work, self-care, eating well, working out, parenting, cooking from scratch, caring for aging parents, and so on.

We need to free ourselves from the guilt that we have to “do it all” and be the best at everything all the time. When we allow ourselves to let go of the third shift, we'll start to see tremendous opportunities unfold.?

Personally, I know that if I’d let the third shift consume me, I never would have built an amazing career nor raised a wonderful family.

There is such freedom in gently lowering the bar, and no longer sacrificing personal needs and playfulness for the sake of “it all.”?

Everyone will be better off when we do.

Your Turn

I’m curious: Are you working a third shift these days? I know it can be a challenge during the summer time, especially when you have young kids!?

What’s one thing you can do to feel a little less guilty this week? Hit reply and let me know!

See you Tuesday!

I’ll be live on Tuesday looking at how to create compelling content for your personal LinkedIn presence. I hope you’ll join me for another great discussion at 9 am PT!