Read then Respond - A Life Lesson

I think most of you know by now, since I have posted about it so much, that Ally has been taking ballroom dance lessons for the past couple of years. It has secretly been something that I have wanted to do since “Dancing with the Stars” began airing in 2005. I am sure I am like so many of you who have secret desires to do something like this, however, there just never seems to be the right time. Of course, Ally doesn’t drive (nor does she want to, as she says “it is too dangerous” LOL) so most of the time I am the one taking her to her lessons. I faithfully lug in my attaché with laptop in tow and sit in a corner to catch up on work. About a month ago, one of the other dance instructors, Garth, came over and said, “Lisa why don’t you let me teach you while Mike works with Ally?” I said, “Garth, I would love to, but I just always feel so behind in work and this is a good chance for me to sit here and catch up”. He replied, “Well, in my experience, work will always be there, but this is an opportunity for you to have some fun and learn something new.” He encouraged me to just think about it and I promised him that I would. The very next week when Ally had a lesson, the first thing he asked me was what I had decided. I truly was behind that particular day and thought I really couldn’t afford the time. However, the more I thought about it the more I thought – why not? This will be good for me. So, I set work aside and took the lesson. I will tell you – that was the most fun I had all week. 

I have now had three lessons and I am having a ball! During that 45-minute lesson, I can turn off every other thought and just enjoy learning the steps. It engages my mind in a totally different way. In ballroom dancing, as in many other situations in life, there can only be one leader. It can be disastrous if both partners try to lead. I have to admit, learning to follow has been somewhat of a challenge for me. LOL 

Garth always talks about keeping your frame. This is important so that the dance partner can anticipate how the leader is going to move. If you get slack in your frame, you will not be able to anticipate the next move nearly as well. As the follower, you READ and then you REACT. As I thought about this more deeply over the past couple of days, I realized how apropos this lesson is in life. With the people in our lives, and especially those that matter most to us, we cannot get lazy. We must stay alert and watchful. We must study how they move, how they think, how they are possibly feeling, so that we can read the signs. We must keep our frame. Otherwise, we may not respond appropriately, and possibly even step on a toe or two, instead of being what that person needs at just the right time.  Slow down, study the situation at hand … and then respond. Life -- just like dance -- will be much more beautiful and grace-filled when we get the order right.