Reactions
People have all kinds of reactions to our condition. There are those that “should” on us, as in, “You should have taken better care of yourself.” There are those that deny the challenges of our condition saying, “Everybody gets tired. Just soldier on like the rest of us,” Some offer unsolicited medical advice. Others decide to avoid us altogether. Why do they do this? Why do they say these things?
Our presence makes healthy people uncomfortable. They don’t know what to say, so they say whatever pops into their brain. We make them uncomfortable at a deeper level. We are living, breathing evidence that they are vulnerable. If this happened to us, then it can happen to them. The search frantically for explanations that assure them that they won’t get sick. If we are honest, we probably did the same thing when we were healthy.
People may react to me with discomfort. I can allow that discomfort without trying to set them right.
#chronicillness #lupus #coping