Reaction

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Reaction. That's my one word resolution for 2025.

A reaction is a reflex, an action that is performed as a response to a stimulus and without conscious thought. An alternative definition is to respond with hostility, opposition, or a contrary course of action.

I want to become more aware of how I react to things. With that awareness, I want to do a better job of managing my reactions. I could enjoy less "hostility", "opposition", and "contrary."

Generally, these reflexive reactions are done to keep the body from harm. We jump out of the way of a speeding car. We put our hands out to break our fall when we stumble. We avoid a dark alley. Some reflexes are part of being a good human, such as the joy of greeting a friend or laughing at someone's joke (if it takes 30 seconds to laugh at a joke, it is very awkward). We also might react to appreciate something of beauty.

Those reactions I want to keep doing.

Sometimes a reaction leads me to act in a way that I don't need to. Those are the ones I want to work on managing. A reaction is often too emotional for the event. Or it is not appropriate (or necessary) at that time.

For example, I am prone to sarcastic remarks. I will sometimes (way too often?) speak without thinking. The snarky comment, the derisive comeback, and the over-the-top response all come out of my mouth before I have the chance to think about them. The emotion might feel good as I momentarily congratulate myself for being witty, but a few seconds later I am regretting what I said.

Social Media and influencers seek to capture my attention and get a reaction. I fall into the trap like a mouse going for the cheese in the mousetrap. Any reaction is what they want, but outrage, anger, and shock are winners for them. I want to respond without gathering enough information or even spending time deciding whether it is worth a response. In retrospect, it doesn't feel good to be manipulated like that.

Is it possible for me to pause for that moment and consider my reaction's cost/benefit? I think it is. If nothing else, I might make my relationship with others more civil. If I want to be a little self-centered, I won't let the other person goad me into reacting in a way that brings them joy and me negativity.

How do I measure whether I am "achieving" my resolution? I will know it deep in my heart. I'll try to note mentally when I did not react to something I would have in the past. A few less sarcastic remarks to my wife will be noteworthy. Not forwarding a controversial or inflammatory post or picture the minute I see it would be a good measure.

It's not the measuring that is important to me. It's the setting of the goal. Now I've put it out into the world (or at least the world that reads my posts). Maybe the world will remind me.

How about you?