Rainbow Stories

About 16 years ago when our son's preschool decided to celebrate grandparents day, his innocent awareness of the world made him assume that he could bring his grandparents from India on his bike. Don't you just love their imagination! And as first-generation immigrant parents we were thinking what we can do, how much our kids are missing every day, is there any way that we can take his mind off that event in school? The biggest dilemma was how do you explain it to a toddler without breaking his heart? The very next day, our friend, Ray, who is family by choice, happened to stop by and learned of our dilemma. He is much more experienced in life than us. We've seeked his advice for a wide spectrum of our needs including how to paint the deck, our first home purchase, learning the culture as new immigrants etc. Based on his research on Indian festivals, he would bring sweets and new utensils on Diwali, colors for holi, treats for Halloween and gifts on Christmas; exactly like a family member following East-West traditions. When he heard of the matter, his immediate response with a big smile was "I am going with him since I fit the profile from every angle." 

Ray took that day off from work to attend grandparent’s day with our son. Not only the school, Ray took our son for ice-cream, bought him a lovely toy. That three years old boy was over the moon to have one more grandparent because until then, Ray was seen by him as mom & dad's friend. If you are parents, you can imagine the sense of gratitude we had for him. Because of many heartfelt moments like this, Ray has been a family member from last 22 years.

We often share this and many other Ray stories with our teenagers and they love hearing it. I think in these times, it's even more important to share such stories with young generation. Our generation has seen more life and we know there is goodness in the world, but I worry that young generation’s exposure mainly driven by social media might take them away from that belief in bonding, connecting and simply caring about each other. Unfortunately latest social injustice incidents compel me to add two things in this story that Ray is White, and my family is not. It is very uncomfortable for hearts to think of any specific color (diversity) when all it wants to think of, is a rainbow (inclusion).

You know, I noticed recently it took me some time to recognize that I need reading glasses now. After I got it, I thought it was the ultimate fix but slowly I realized that getting a book with larger print, adjusting the light around me, holding the book at a certain distance, could be beneficial as well. I think of same way for when it comes to conversation on race. Recognizing the need of open conversations is the biggest step. We’ve to also think of creating the right environment, taking some tangible steps for mindful and enriched outcomes. 

I am sure we all have Ray stories. It is very important for us to share those stories with young generation. Let them know we have glasses for a better perspective now. Let them know despite the uniqueness of colors, we still spot the rainbows and they will too.

Because Ray embraced us with an open heart and showed us to look beyond colors, I add this learning in my treasure chest as one of the rainbow stories of my life. Do you have any Ray or rainbow stories to share or the glasses that see beyond colors?