Radical Listening: A Leadership Superpower

In leadership, listening isn’t just a communication skill—it’s a strategic act of influence. For directors, VPs, and senior executives, what I call “radical listening” offers a path to deeper connections, fewer conflicts, and more effective team management. Radical listening is about more than just hearing words; it’s about managing yourself and maintaining presence and controlling the urge to fix, advise, interrupt or argue. In short, radical listening requires conflict capacity and self-discipline.

Here are five positive practices to help you become a powerful communicator who earns trust and alignment.

1. Focus without Distraction

“Busy” is the enemy of connection.

When you step away from multitasking and dedicate your attention to conversations, you communicate respect and build trust. For high-pressure roles, focusing on one conversation at a time ensures you don’t miss key insights.

Reality Check: Splitting your attention means you’ll miss subtle cues like hesitation, frustration, or excitement. This can lead to misunderstandings that impact decision-making and erode trust.

Pro Tip: If you need to monitor emails during a conversation, explain that upfront: “I have a pressing matter I need to monitor, but I want to give you my full attention for the next 10 minutes. Let’s make the most of it.”

What Not to Do: Don’t try to sneak in a text or email while someone is speaking—people notice. This not only feels disrespectful but also undermines the relationship. A distracted leader loses credibility quickly.

2. Let Others Finish

It’s not about efficiency—it’s about respect.

Resisting the urge to interrupt shows patience and allows others to fully express themselves. As a seasoned leader, giving others space to speak promotes trust and collaboration.

Reality Check: People don’t absorb feedback when they feel unheard. Interrupting sends a subtle message that your time or ideas are more important than theirs.

Pro Tip: Set the time frame in advance. You can say something like, “I have 20 minutes before a hard stop. Is that enough time?” When someone takes too long to explain their point, jot down key thoughts and wait for a natural pause to respond. It signals patience and control.

What Not to Do: Avoid saying, “Can you get to the point?” This phrase not only frustrates others but creates a defensive atmosphere, reducing psychological safety. Instead, guide conversations to an end result, with open-ended questions like: “What’s the outcome you’re hoping for?”

3. Understand First, Solve Later

Solutions aren't always what people need—validation is.

Offering advice only after understanding someone’s perspective builds stronger relationships and ensures better outcomes. People feel valued when their emotions are acknowledged before solutions are discussed.

Reality Check: When someone expresses frustration, it’s not always a request for a solution. What they need first is acknowledgment—help them feel understood before rushing to fix the issue.

Pro Tip: Use reflective statements like: “It sounds like this situation is really weighing on you. Tell me more.” This encourages the other person to share openly, leading to better solutions that they discover themselves. Comprehend before you counsel.

What Not to Do: Don’t jump in with advice right away, saying things like, “Here’s what I think you should do.” This can feel like you're dismissing their emotional experience. Instead, help them arrive at their own solution through coaching questions.

4. ?Validate to Build Trust

Every problem feels big to the person facing it.

Recognizing someone’s emotions fosters connection and helps de-escalate frustrations. When people feel heard, they are more open to productive conversations and solutions.

Reality Check: People interpret dismissal as disrespect. What may seem minor to you could be a source of deep stress or confusion for someone else. Acknowledging their feelings creates space for problem-solving.

Pro Tip: Ask fact-based questions to help them reframe the situation without invalidating their emotions: “What’s the core challenge here, and how can I support you?”

What Not to Do: Don’t say, “This isn’t worth worrying about.” This approach makes others feel their concerns are insignificant, reducing trust. After they feel heard, help them identify actionable steps.

5. Invite Input

Silence isn’t a threat—it’s a tool.

Allowing employees to share their thoughts creates a sense of ownership and improves decision-making. When leaders slow down and listen, they gain valuable insights that may otherwise go unheard.

Reality Check: People need space to process information and respond thoughtfully. If you dominate the conversation, you risk missing out on valuable input and alienating your team.

Pro Tip: After sharing your thoughts, pause and ask: “What’s your take on this?” This not only invites engagement but also encourages your team to think critically.

What Not to Do: Avoid filling every pause with more information. Silence can be uncomfortable, but it’s where reflection happens. Give others time to gather their thoughts and respond meaningfully.

Conclusion: Master the Art of Listening Under Pressure

Leadership is not just about making decisions—it’s about fostering connection. Radical listening takes practice, but the rewards are well worth the effort. When you master listening, you create an environment where people feel safe to speak up, solve their own problems, and align with your vision.

In a world where executives are expected to deliver results and navigate complex challenges, listening is often the most overlooked skill. Yet, it’s also one of the most impactful. By slowing down, resisting the urge to interrupt, and showing up fully, you signal to your team that their voices matter. And when people feel heard, they perform better.

The next time you feel too busy to listen, remember this: Listening isn’t a detour from your agenda—it’s the bridge to better outcomes.

Marlene Chism is a consultant, speaker, and the author of?? From Conflict to Courage: How to Stop Avoiding and Start Leading (Berrett-Koehler 2022). She is a recognized expert on the LinkedIn Global Learning platform. Connect with Chism via?LinkedIn ,?or at MarleneChism.com