A Radiant Approach Towards Life - An Interview with Matthew Polefko

#enduringsuccess #chooseandbecome #trishkendallspeaks #micromoments #healthcare #leadership #mentor #strongfoundation

Hello from Trish

Newsletter Intro ??

In the Choose & Become Interview series, I delve into the five critical choices that led me to enduring success, and I unearth the inspirational stories of my guests as they share their journeys to enduring success with us using this five-choice framework.??

Each Create Enduring Success newsletter edition includes:

• One interview episode to link directly to or start by reading some quotes from my guest that stuck with me.
• A link to each chapter for a shorter, self-guided experience!

Today’s Episode—Matt Polefko - Healthcare Director, Leadership Developer, Mentor, Coach, Husband and soon-to-be Father

I met Matt through my dear friend and business partner, Jennie Geise . After attending a Harnessing Potential workshop where Matt spoke, Jennie immediately texted me and said, "Trish, we HAVE to interview Matt for Choose & Become." And I’m so grateful she did and that Matt said yes!

From our very first conversation, it was clear—we are completely aligned in our passion to create true, lasting, enduring success by giving and receiving love—the verb.

Matt is a leader in the healthcare industry, deeply committed to caring for patients, collaboration, coaching, and "rebuilding healthcare the right way." His insights, experiences, and the choices he has made on his journey will leave you inspired to reflect on your own path to enduring success.

Watch now . . . or check out the excerpts and some of my favorite quotes and reflections below the video link.??

A Little Bit About Matt

Matt, will you share a little bit about yourself to my community who has not met you yet?

I want to start with my childhood because it shaped who I am and why I do what I do today."

When I was five, my mom took me to several doctors, and I was eventually diagnosed with Tourette’s syndrome. My tics were mild—two were physical, one was verbal—but they shaped my early years. I struggled in school, often labeled a troublemaker simply because my body and mind processed the world differently.

By middle school, teachers insisted I had a learning disability—despite repeated testing that proved otherwise. Then, in eighth grade, after failing yet another test, my mom took me to my science teacher and said, “He knows this material. He understands it at home. Something’s not right.”

The teacher looked at me and said, “Well, he’s a C student, so he should just get C’s.”

That moment stuck with me. I internalized it. I believed it. And when I failed my first college classes, it seemed to confirm what I had been told—I just wasn’t smart enough. But at some point, I decided to challenge that belief. I gave everything I had to my education, and in my final semesters of college, I graduated with straight A’s.

That’s when I realized the truth: "I didn’t have a learning disability. My teachers had a teaching disability."

I’ve always been told what to do, but I’ve been relentlessly committed to understanding how.

Now, my mission is clear: helping others understand not just what success looks like, but how to get there—in a way that works for them.

Reflection Questions:

1. Think back to a time when someone underestimated you—how did you respond?
2. Where in your life have you built trust in yourself despite external doubt?
3. How can you help others see their potential beyond the limitations placed on them?

Create Enduring Success

I know that everybody has their own definition of success. And sometimes I have to pull myself back from projecting what my definition of enduring success is. So Matt, I am now even more curious - what does it mean to you to create enduring success?

Sometimes, understanding what enduring success is starts with recognizing what it isn’t.

For much of my life and career, I didn’t have a clear direction—I found my way by trying things, figuring out what didn’t serve me, and learning what I didn’t want. That process wasn’t just about jobs or career paths; it was also about habits. I used to tell myself, I don’t have time—for creative work, for relationships, for things that mattered—until I looked at my phone and saw I’d spent five hours a day doom-scrolling. Enduring success isn’t built on distractions; it’s built on intentional choices.

I like to think of success as a foundation. If you build on unstable ground—like clay—your foundation cracks. When challenges come, do you let those cracks spread? Or do you stay committed to the daily habits and values that make you strong?

True, lasting success isn’t about a single achievement—it’s about the foundation you build, brick by brick, that holds steady through life’s inevitable storms.

To build that foundation, I focus on two key things: vitality—bringing energy and presence into everything I do—and trust. I used to think I had done a lot on my own, but when I reflect on my journey, I realize—I’ve done nothing on my own. I wouldn’t be where I am without my family, mentors, colleagues, and my incredibly supportive wife. Trusting relationships are a critical part of building a strong foundation for enduring success.

Reflection Questions:

1. What habits or distractions are keeping you from the success you want?
2. What foundation are you building for your future? Is it strong enough to withstand life’s storms?
3. Who in your life has helped you succeed? How can you strengthen those relationships?

Five-Critical Choices—Matt's Journey

Come along with me as I explore Matt's journey to enduring success . . .

Make a First Choice

Is there a first choice, whether practical or profound, (outside of doom scrolling!) that really impacted your definition of and your journey to creating enduring success?

One of the most defining first choices I made was in college.

After years of believing I just wasn’t smart enough, I finally asked myself: Is that really true? Or have I just been told that my entire life?

I made the choice to give everything I had to those last two semesters—no holding back. Looking back, I realize that was a risky bet. If I had failed, it could have been devastating to my self-esteem. But I knew that playing small wasn’t going to get me anywhere.

I made a similar choice in love. I’ve always been a hopeless romantic, and at a young age, I knew I didn’t want to do life alone. I wanted to find my person. So I threw myself into dating—fully, wholeheartedly—despite knowing that heartbreak was a real possibility. And it was worth it. I met my wife, and after 11 years together, I can say with certainty: every moment of uncertainty and every past heartbreak was worth it.

This idea applies to so much more than love. It applies to work, relationships, personal growth—any place where fear holds us back. We tell ourselves we’ll take the leap tomorrow, but the longer we wait, the scarier it feels.

The truth is, the idea of doing something is usually scarier than the act itself.

If we choose to go all in—if we commit fully, even at the risk of failure—we can’t lose. Because no matter what, we’ll learn something that moves us forward.

Reflection Questions:

1. What’s one area of your life where fear is keeping you from going all in?
2. Have you ever believed a narrative about yourself that wasn’t true? How did you challenge it?
3. What’s a first choice you could make today that would change your trajectory?

Commit to Two Way Agreements

The second critical choice that I made on my journey was to commit to a two-way agreement. And that agreement was between me and my sister and her husband. And we really entered into almost a near contractual agreement. At that time in my life, what I experienced through that commitment is the joy in the ordinary. And I've kept that with me forever.

So let's talk a little bit about two-way agreements. Will you share with us one of the agreements that you've entered into, or even just your thoughts on two-way agreements and what you give and what you get?

One of the most impactful two-way agreements in my life was when I moved in with my wife, Solomiya. Anyone who’s ever moved in with a partner—or even a roommate—knows it’s an adjustment. I grew up in a house where things were a little lived in, while Solomiya grew up in a home where everything had its perfect place. At first, I thought, If she wants things a certain way, she can handle it. But I quickly realized how unfair that was. We weren’t just living in a shared space; we were creating a shared life.

So we sat down and committed—not just to dividing household responsibilities, but to showing up for each other in a way that mattered. And we also learned that life doesn’t always allow for a perfect balance. Some days, the split is 50/50. Other days, it’s 90/10 or even 100/0.

And that’s where grace comes in. Because love—the verb—shows up in the giving, but also in the receiving.

It took me a long time to understand that when Solomiya did something for me, it wasn’t because she had to—it was her way of expressing love.

But two-way agreements aren’t just for relationships. As the psychologist Barbara L. Fredrickson so beautifully describes, "Love is that micro-moment of warmth and connection that you share with another living being." It can be as simple as making eye contact with the grocery store cashier instead of scrolling on your phone, really asking how their day is going, and meaning it. These moments seem small, but they matter. Love isn’t finite. The more we give, the more we generate. Like a bank account that builds interest, love grows the more we invest in it—until we have more than enough to give away freely.

Reflection Questions:

1. When was the last time you truly received someone’s love - the verb?
2. What micro-moment of love can you create today?

Build Trust

The third critical choice that I made, we've already been talking about, but I want to get deliberate is around building trust. Will you dive in a little bit more and give us more of your perspective on building trust in yourself and inspiring the trust of others?

For a long time, I didn’t trust myself. I had been told for years that I wasn’t smart enough, that I wasn’t capable, that I should consider something easier. That voice stayed in my head, and every time I doubted myself, it reinforced that belief. I knew if I wanted to change my life, I had to change that voice.

So I started small. I practiced self-talk, as silly as it felt at first. I celebrated even the smallest wins—because if I told myself I was capable enough times, eventually, I’d believe it. And it worked.

Olympic gold medalist Lanny Bassham , who now coaches world-class athletes, teaches the power of reinforcing small successes. He says that when you accomplish even the tiniest win—whether it’s getting out of bed on time or finishing a workout—you should celebrate it as if you just won the Super Bowl. At first, it feels ridiculous. But over time, that kind of positive reinforcement builds self-trust and confidence.

Trust isn’t just about what we tell ourselves, though—it’s also about how we show up for others. I’ve found that three things are essential to building trust:

1?? Bring energy into your relationships. In How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie points out that no one greets you with more enthusiasm than a dog. The moment you walk through the door, they radiate excitement, tails wagging, completely unable to contain their joy. We could bring that kind of energy into our relationships—but we don’t. Why? We hold back, afraid it’s too much. But the truth is, people trust and connect with those who bring genuine warmth. A little enthusiasm can change everything.

2?? Be present. We build trust when people feel seen, heard, and valued. That means putting down the phone, making eye contact, and truly listening—not just waiting for our turn to speak. When I get home at the end of the day, I put my phone in the kitchen drawer and shut it away. That’s my way of committing to presence.

3?? Do what you say you’ll do. If you make a commitment, keep it. And if you can’t? Don’t just hope they’ll forget—communicate. The fastest way to lose trust is to let things quietly slip through the cracks. The fastest way to build trust? Keep your word, no matter how small the promise.

Trust isn’t built overnight—it’s built in the small moments, the quiet commitments, and the way we show up for ourselves and each other every day.

Reflection Questions:

1. Do you show up with presence in your relationships, or are distractions getting in the way?
2. Where in your life can you bring more energy and enthusiasm?
3. What is a small win you can celebrate today? How about celebrating a small win for someone else?

Create Community and Belonging ??

The fourth critical choice I made was to create community and belonging. Will you share with me your thoughts around creating community and belonging?

For much of my life, I felt like an outsider. I had friends, but I never felt like I truly fit. I rotated through different friend groups in middle school, high school, college, and even now as an adult. And while I had great friendships, I never felt that deep connection I saw others have—especially with male friendships, which can often be built around drinking, video games, or sports. I liked sports, but beyond that, I didn’t always share the same interests as my peers.

For years, I assumed I just hadn’t found the right friendships.

But after a lot of self-reflection, I realized something big: I was the one holding myself back. I was the one keeping conversations surface-level. I was the one deflecting anything deeper. I was the one withdrawing before I could truly connect.

I had always thought of belonging as something others had to offer me, but in reality, belonging is something we have to choose for ourselves.

At its core, belonging is a choice we make moment to moment—to show up fully, to let ourselves be seen, to trust that we are enough. When we don’t, we create our own loneliness. And that feeling—loneliness—is what happens when we aren’t part of something bigger than ourselves.

We often tie our identity to our work, and I think that's a catastrophic mistake. Jobs change. Careers shift. If work is your only source of belonging, what happens when it’s gone? Instead, I believe in something bigger—whether it’s being the best partner, parent, or friend I can be, or simply creating micro-moments of connection throughout my day. Because those moments—a real conversation, a shared laugh, an act of kindness—are what make us feel like we truly belong.

Reflection Questions:

1. Where in your life are you waiting to be accepted instead of choosing to belong?
2. Have you ever held back from deeper connections out of fear?
3. What small act can you take today to create a moment of connection?

Embrace Boundless Love?

We're going to end our interview with what we have threaded through the entire interview. The fifth critical choice and actually the only and most important choice is to embrace our fullest capacity to give love and to receive love.

Anybody that is watching this can clearly see once you've made that choice, all the other choices, it's almost like not even conscious because you've made the choice to give all and to receive all. And therefore you make those tough first choices. You commit to those agreements. You build trust. You create community and belonging. It all comes together.

Because I know I can ask you this, is there an example that comes to mind where you know you made the choice to give all your love, and what did that feel like?

One of the most defining moments in my life happened when I was working one of my first jobs—mopping floors in the operating room of a hospital. Part of my role was transporting patients from their rooms to surgery, and one day, I was assigned to a woman who had traveled alone from another country for a critical operation. She was in unbearable pain—every small bump in the hallway made her wince. When we arrived outside the operating room, protocol said I was supposed to leave her there and move on.

But she was alone. Crying. In pain. Waiting in a cold, sterile hallway.

And I thought, I can’t do that. I won’t do that.

So I stayed. I broke protocol and sat with her. I let her cry, let her know she wasn’t alone. That moment shaped the rest of my career. It made me realize that a small act of love can change everything.

I believe love is generative—the more we give, the more we create. And we don’t need grand gestures. It’s in the micro-moments. A kind word. A hand on a shoulder. Simply staying when someone needs us. That’s how we embrace boundless love—by choosing, in every moment, to give what we can.

And when we do? We don’t just give love. We receive it back, in ways we never expected.

Reflection Questions:

1. When was the last time you chose to stay when someone needed you?
2. What’s one small act of love you can give today?
3. Where in your life are you withholding love—out of fear, hesitation, or doubt?

Final Thoughts from Trish

Matt, thank you. Thank you for choosing to give all of your love to us today. And thank you for choosing to receive all the love that I wanted to give."

I believe with my whole heart that we each have the power to create enduring success. Not fleeting success, not transactional success—but real, lasting, enduring success. And as Matt shared today, it all comes down to a choice.

A choice we make in every moment, in every interaction, to give all the love we have.

And when we do? We don’t run out of love. We don’t lose our ability to give and receive more love. Love is generative. The more we give, the more we create.

Matt, I am so excited to follow your journey. Thank you for sharing your story, your wisdom, and your heart.

And to all of you joining us—thank you for being here. Choose & Become.

Thank you!???

Don’t miss new Choose & Become Interview episodes! Subscribe on your favorite podcast player.???

Wishing you all the best on your journey to enduring success.?????

Choose & become!????

Trish???

Join us for more inspiration and community building throughout the week at Trish Kendall Choose & Become LinkedIn???

More About Trish????

Trish Kendall is proof that we each have the power to transform our lives and create true success—enduring success—no matter our story, experiences, or circumstances. We must choose.

Trish's inspiring and impactful approach helps organizations, teams and individuals create enduring success, together. ??

Inspiring people around the world, and providing a pathway to enduring success, Trish brings candid stories, humor in the face of true hardship, simple lessons, compassion, and love to all her speaking engagements and workshops.

Contact Trish for your next conference or team offsite.??

Watch Trish's TEDx talk: The Secret to Creating Enduring Success: Embrace Boundless Love