Questions and Answers
With my 56th birthday coming up in a few days, I feel free and alive for the first time in a while! I thought this might be a good time to publicly answer some of the questions I hear almost daily when I’m home. A few of these questions were hard to answer without crying a while back, but I finally have the strength to answer themwithout shedding tears. Healing is a step-by-step process, and I am giving myself time to heal, and being honest and vulnerable is part of my healing process.
Here are the questions I’m asked most often:
1. “Are you still married?” No, I am not. After a year long separation, our divorce was final in July of 2018.
2. “I’m sorry, what happened?” After 30 years of wedded bliss, we stopped communicating. He’s a good man, I’m a good woman, enough said.
3. “Are you dating?” Well, there are memes out therethat describe dating in your 50s. They go something like this: “Dating in your 50s is like going to a thrift store and finding the least broken item that doesn’t smell or leak.” So, next question.
4. “Why did you become a flight attendant?” This one has a four-part answer.
(1) I needed a steady income. I was no longer part of the family business and my real estate license was on ice.
(2) I needed to get away from Longmont and find myself. Every time I went out in town, I was reminded of a marriage that no longer existed. (I felt as if I failed, I was extremely insecure about it, and I thought I was secretly being judged.) When I saw certain people, I couldn’t speak. I could only cry.
(3) I wanted a career where I could get paid to travel.
(4) I decided to live my life with no more regrets. I asked myself, “What did I want to be when I was a little girl?” A flight attendant was the answer.
5. “How do you become a flight attendant?” Youapply with an airline and pray you get an interview.
6. “Why does training take so long?” Because we are extensively trained on how to save your ass when an emergency happens, not just serve you a coke and snack.
7. “Do you make good money?” I started at $18 an hour plus a per diem when I’m away from my home base.
8. “Do you get to travel for free?” Yes, when I’m commuting on domestic flights, on certain airlines. I have to pay the airport tax on international travel. For example, my flight to Paris was $78 and Geneva was $48. (I also use a mobile hotel app that offers deep discounts at hotels/resorts.)
9. “Do you get buddy passes?” No, my company does not offer buddy passes. I work for a regional carrier that works for United. I actually fly United Express flights on a CRJ550 jet—there’s one flight attendant for 50 passengers. Right now I’m based in Chicago and soon I’ll be based in Newark. (Research the aircraft on Google for more details.)
10. “Do you fly internationally?” Only to Toronto and Montreal when I work. It’s a small jet.
11. “What’s the best overnight you’ve ever had?” Most all of them! I fly with the best crew and I always feel as if I’m with family. (However, Bend, OR, Traverse City, MI, Huntsville, AL, Charleston, SC, Memphis, TN, Kalispell, MT, El Paso, TX, Rapid City, SD, Atlanta, GA, Medford, OR, Louisville, KY, Birmingham, AL, Tulsa, OK, Cincinnati, OH, Albuquerque, NM, San Antonio, TX, Santa Barbara, CA, San Jose, CA, and Bangor, ME, weren’t too shabby.)
12. “Do you miss your kids?” Yes! However, I actually spendmore time with Chase now that I fly, and Madi and I try to connect a few times a month. Chase will joke that he doesn’t get to miss me anymore, since I’m in Portland all the time. (It’s nice that the kids and I have also been on a couple of trips together.)
13. “Are you still doing Coffee and Connections?” Yes, but monthly instead of weekly. And I now have a bigger audience online, which includes the incredible businesswomen I’ve met on my layovers, from Tipp City, Ohio to Tacoma, Washington. (I’m planning to do Facebook live meetings soon.)
14. “Who watches your pups while you’re gone?” I have a sweet, warmhearted young lady and her kids who take incredible care of my little boys. I feel I have an extended family with great support.
15. “Is your hair naturally curly?” Yes! And I also joined a Facebook group for curly-haired people.