In The Pursuit Of HAPPINESS....

I am sure this title must have reminded many of you about the epic Will Smith’s movie which  is one of my all time favourites too. Besides spelling difference, my perspective in this pursuit is a little more introspective than motivational. While Will’s movie used ‘The’ as a prefix, I am using ‘In.’ Since the time I came to know that Bhutan is World’s most happiest country, the same is on my travelling wish list & I am really looking forward to witnessing the same. We all talk about happiness multiple times during the day and most of us have invented our own unique ways to make an attempt to feel or pretend to be happy. Happiness which sounds such a simple word has become so complex that we sometimes take Google’s help to stimulate our understanding about the same. During my individual and group counselLing sessions, I often meet people who say they want to be happy in life. This validates the fact that happiness is indeed a pursuit for most and that’s how I got this idea to share my own version of happiness. Happiness has become too subjective of a term that we often have our own versions of happiness. Some are seeking happiness in relationships, some have regimented happiness to their future goals, for many, happiness is hovering around suitable employment opportunities, some are seeking happiness in wander-lands and the list goes on….

But the question is, how can we become happy? 

We have made happiness more of a physical thing and that’s why we always remain in pursuit of it. Let me share a small story before continuing further: One Day, a 10 year old misplaced his pencil box and he was searching for it in the backyard of his house. When his father came home from work, he asked him: Father: Son, what are you looking for? Son:  I misplaced my pencil box and I am searching for it. Father: Where did you keep it? Son: As far as I could recall, I left it somewhere in the living room. Father: Then son, your search is erroneous. Go and search in the house, you can only find it  where you actually lost it. We are behaving exactly like the 10 year old in this story when we aim at finding happiness in the physical realm. Our physical expression is just a reflection of our inner feelings and nothing beyond that. Happiness is an emotional state which can only be felt from within. The problem is that we have regimented happiness with a certain lifestyle or a life pattern which we are aiming to achieve. In Buddhism they say, ‘There is no path to happiness, happiness is the path.’

Despite being one of the most comfortable generations in human evolution, we are still floundering when it comes to finding happiness. Can we grant ourselves a few minutes during the day to introspect? When I say a few minutes, these minutes must be a complete cut off from our current thoughts and mental actions. We should rather utilise this time to focus on our past wishes which were granted, our desires which got fulfilled and we must utilise this time to observe our surroundings and must see those who are striving hard to make the ends meet. Well, this may sound a little philosophical and sermonising to many, but before putting it here, I have applied this to myself and it really works. Sometimes, a little reshuffling at our home or workplace helps in reactivating and channelizing energies around us and the same old place looks and feels more vibrant and pleasant. Let’s forbid ourselves from expecting others around us to transmute themselves in the version that we feel is the best. Let us try to turn inwards and work towards making ourselves as our best possible version. 

Let us try to replace our anxiety with serenity, our thanklessness with thankfulness, our wishes and desires with gratitude, our insecurity with love and affection, our prejudices with admiration, our expectations with generosity, our apprehension with letting-go and our ego with submissiveness. ‘One way of being wise is to be happy.’ 

The pursuit of happiness never ends as the word pursuit in itself means chasing something. ‘The beauty of happiness lies in living it and not chasing it. In Parapsychology we say ’Those who are depressed are living in the past, those who are anxious are living in the future and those who are happy are living in the present.’ Let us decide which category we would like to put ourselves into as living in the past or future would deprive us of enjoying our present. Let us not take life as a mutual funds investment which only talks about the future. Life is more about living in the present and spending each and every moment carefully and optimally. Let us not waste precious moments of our lives by worrying about all those things which we do not have, let’s rather focus on all those beautiful things we have around us and happiness will automatically take over. 

Happiness is not ready made, it comes with your own actions - Dalai Lama

Prince Dhawan

#karmaandyou

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