Purpose and adversity

1.? Adversity can help you find your purpose

When I was a little girl, tragedy transformed our lives. My brother passed away when I was three, and he wasn’t even ten. In search of answers and comfort, my family, consumed with grief, joined a cult-like organisation which became the centre of our universe. But at 19, I escaped the cult a minute before I was to marry another member. It was as liberating as jumping out of an aeroplane without a parachute. And this arduous journey had to be taken alone after losing all my social circles. But it was also an immense opportunity to undergo a deep meaning search, explore my set of values and beliefs, and define who I am. As part of this quest, I went to university to study philosophy, started volunteering, and became who I am today.

You live long enough, and you will endure tragedy and trauma. We all face losses – losing a loved one, our health, our job, or our home. It is tough. Adversity can lead a person to ask: Why did this happen to me? What did I do to deserve it?

Instead, we should ask: What can I learn from this? How can I impart meaning to this tragedy? Some use their trauma to learn and grow, while others choose to help others. Some people’s life purpose after a tragedy is to help prevent it from happening to others. Rosie Batty, AO, lost her son to domestic violence and became one of the most vital voices in Australia on these issues. Others seem to be the impossible, like terror attack victims who become a voice for peace. It can be gruelling, but it gives the person a deep sense of purpose and meaning.

It may take time to look at the tragedy and realise its positive outcomes or what you can learn from it. But purpose can be found in the darkest of places.

2.? Purpose can help you through the hardships

When I decided to study philosophy, my parents couldn’t fathom why I wanted to do it. They saw it as “impractical”. Yet that degree helped to shape my thinking and life approach, building the ethical foundation for my morality and teaching. When I studied Nietzsche, one of his famous quotes stayed with me:

We often speak about our purpose as our “why”. As I explained in the first edition of this newsletter, a purpose is the reason for which something was created or exists. This is true for objects, but it’s more complicated for people. We were not necessarily created for a particular purpose, but we need to cultivate it by living a more purposeful life. A good way of doing this is by considering the positive impact you want to create in the world and working towards it. When you do this, you walk the earth with a deep sense of mattering, which, in turn, can help you to endure the hardships better. It is not an easy recipe, but it can make life more meaningful and bearable if done well.

3.? Purpose in the face of adversity can lead to meaning

There is a famous saying that tragedy + time = comedy. When enough time has passed, you can laugh at it. I don’t know if this is always true, but tragedy + time + reflection + impact can help make life more meaningful. Meaningfulness increases when we have a deep sense that our lives matter. Research shows that people with the strongest feeling of life significance serve and help others.

Meaningfulness increases when we have a deep sense that our lives matter. Research shows that people with the strongest feeling of life significance serve and help others.

As Mahatma Gandhi once said: ‘The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.’ When we serve others to the point of making a real difference in their lives, we can lose ourselves and let go of our troubles, obsessions, and issues. However, we can also find ourselves by understanding who we are and how we help a person, a group, the community, or the world. Indeed, in Buddhism, the purpose of life is to serve all sentient beings, not only people but animals and nature too.

I define my life purpose as using my teaching and research to create a ripple-effect impact on the world. How do you describe yours?

?

?

?

?

?

?